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You Will Not Kiss Me	By : Prosperosdaughter Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 22836 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: JK Rowling & her associates own the Harry Potter universe and I make no money from my stories.

Chapter List
- 61
- 62
- 63
Direct quotes in bold from Chapter 24 of OotP are © J.K. Rowling

Chapter 62: Expendable

"Severus!" Snape felt his breathe exhale and tried not to flinch with it in front of Lupin.

Lupin was now at his side, and threw off the covers to inspect his injuries.

"Why ... why wouldn't you take your potions, oh Severus," Lupin whispered as he passed his wand shakily over Snape's body, Snape taking sharp intakes of breath with every visible tremor that ran over Snape's skin, shredding his nerves anew.

"Your wrist and shoulder – they're dislocated. I can do the shoulder, but – oh the wrist – I don't think I can - and your arm. Oh Severus – the bone is sticking out," Lupin almost whimpered. "That's too tricky for me to heal." Tippy measured out the potions and indicated them to Lupin, who quickly read Snape's manuscript labels.

"Yes, Tippy. Give those to Professor Snape now." Tippy spelled the potions into Snape and Snape started to feel the jagged edge of pain beginning to dull once more, but so did his other senses.

Lupin continued passing his wand over Snape. "Ribs too? God, Severus! Did he throw you like a rag doll?" There was a sob in Lupin's voice that twisted Snape's heart. He wished he could embrace him, desperately wanted to touch him and feel better. Then Lupin took a deep breath. "I can mend those, at least." He passed his wand over the shoulder and then three ribs and Snape felt them flare with the warmth of the healing charms and then the coldness that followed as the pain from those injuries receded. "There'll be bruising. Tippy, find the Bruise Salve and the Internal Injury Potion, please."

Snape heard the slapping of the elf's large feet as she ran to the bathroom to fetch it. He looked up at Lupin, who was running his hands softly over Snape looking for anything else he might have missed. Snape wanted to hold out his hand to Lupin. He wanted to kiss Lupin's hand that now cupped his cheek, but he was beyond weak, a prisoner of pain and potions. Lupin stroked his face. It set the flayed nerves under his skin on edge, but he didn't care. Lupin pushed away Snape's damp hair and he kissed Snape's forehead, crooning gently to him as Snape's overbright eyes stared at him, trying to fight the impending sleep.

As soon as Tippy had spelled the dose of Internal Injury Potion, Lupin turned to her: "Quickly, Tippy. Go to Headmaster Dumbledore. Tell him Professor Snape needs Madame Pomfrey to be invited here." The elf nodded and popped away.

Lupin knelt by the bed, holding Snape's other hand between his own.

"My love, I'm so sorry I wasn't here. So sorry." He rested his forehead against the clasp of hands. Snape wanted to tell him it wasn't his fault; it couldn't possibly be his fault, but instead he felt himself starting to drift between painful awareness and medicated oblivion, until he heard a faint pop.

Poppy Pomfrey bustled in and gently but firmly took hold of Lupin's shoulders.

"There, there, dear. I need to get to Severus please." Lupin looked up at Poppy and Snape could see the distress in his face and tears in his eyes.

"I've mended these three ribs, and this shoulder was dislocated, but I couldn't do the rest," Lupin said, his voice small with failure, as he wiped tears from his cheeks with his hands.

"Now, dear. Don't take on. I'm here now. Leave him to me," Poppy said, with a small squeeze of his shoulder and an understanding smile as she turned her attention to Snape.

"Come, Remus." Dumbledore stood at the doorway, his open arm indicating the next room. "Let Poppy minister to Severus now. Perhaps, Tippy can find us a nice pot of tea." The little elf was startled out of her own paralysis of concern in the corner, and she ran out of the room in front of Dumbledore and Lupin.

"Well, Severus," Poppy said, in her matter-of-fact tone, as her wand scanned his body, "I never thought after that Hallowe'en of 1981 I'd be tending your injuries from You-Know-Who again." She shook her head as her fingers gently moved to the broken radius bone protruding from his skin. "It will hurt, Severus, but only briefly, I promise." His eyes flickered upwards with the intense burst of pain as the healing charm pulled the bone back into place and knitted it with its welcome warmth. His eyes opened and he tried to relax again, trying to discern the words of the rumble of voices from the next room that seemed to be rising.

"Now then, this wrist ..." but her head snapped upwards as they both heard Lupin's raised voice from the next room.

"You knew? You knew Voldemort always summoned Severus on Christmas Day, and you told me to be elsewhere! Albus ... why would you do that?" Lupin shouted. Snape closed his eyes and relished it through his pain. "I could have been here and got him help straightaway. I don't understand ..."

"I'm not having this," Poppy grumbled under her breath as she bustled out of the bedroom door.

"That's quite enough, Remus Lupin!" Poppy ordered sharply. "I need to concentrate on my patient. I'm sure this can wait! And you, Albus, stop agitating him! You can talk about this later."

She returned, closing the bedroom door gently and smoothed down her pinafore.

"Now then," Poppy said quietly, "this wrist." Her finger gently padded around the wrist and then her wand followed the same course. "It's broken and dislocated, Severus. I'm going to give you more potion to knock you out."

"No," Snape gasped, "Don't want ... to be ... knocked out."

Poppy gave an impatient snort. "You don't want to be awake for this," she chided. "There's too much damage ..."

"No," Snape insisted breathlessly.

"Be it on your own head," she huffed, but her touch and expression were still tender as she cast the charm to mend the break, the warmth of the charm this time doing nothing to disguise the agony of the break moving against the dislocated joint and Snape spasmed with renewed agony and uttered a hoarse, dry cry as Poppy then quickly healed the dislocation, the second spell following speedily on the heels of the first with its warmth. Snape struggled to breathe as the pain of the breaks and dislocation receded so all that remained was the Cruciatus and the bruising.

"There," Poppy said. "Just Bruise Salve now and then we can see about making you take some more Cruciatus Potion."

"Sherry," Snape croaked.

"What's that?" Poppy said as she started working the Salve into and around his ribs.

"I smell ... sherry ... dry," he rasped, the faintest trace of a pull at the corners of his mouth, now his broken bones no longer jarred his body with every breath.

"Yes, well, I may have had a Christmas tipple, Severus. That hardly constitutes being drunk in charge of a patient. An impatient patient at that!" Poppy snorted, and she started to work the Salve into Snape's arm and shoulder. "I was just sitting down to a four for bridge with Albus, Minerva and Filius, I'll have you know. Nearly jumped out of my skin when this ... well ... disembodied bow appeared by the table." She snorted again. "Piece of work, your house-elf, isn't she?"

Snape managed a bit more of a smile. "Smart," he managed to say.

"Now, Severus," Poppy said, as she breathed in deeply, clearly expecting a fight. "I need you take your Post-Cruciatus Potion."

"No," Snape gasped again. "Remus ..."

"I can look after that," Lupin said quietly, from the doorway. "I can at least do that."

"Well, I don't see ... oh," she stopped short as if she had suddenly recalled something. "Of course, Remus dear." Her cheeks coloured a little, and tidied around the bed to cover her embarrassment. "I'll leave you to it then. I'll return tomorrow morning to check on you. After … well, when the worst of the tremens is over, see if you can eat something." She pressed Snape's hand gently and gave him a small smile and did the same to Lupin. "

"I'm sure Tippy will take care of them both on that score, Poppy. We should leave them now," Dumbledore said genially from the doorway now that Lupin had moved inside and ran a lone finger on Snape's hand, and he smiled a sad smile at Snape and then moved to usher out the two visitors.

Snape closed his eyes as they all left the bedroom and he heard murmured thanks and farewells at the door and two cracks of Apparition just after.

Lupin returned to the bedroom and took off his robe and boots and sat on the bed and leant over Snape, and kissed his lips as lightly as he could, pushing back his hair from his neck and then kissed the Claiming bite lightly at first before starting to tongue it and, with each brush of his tongue, Snape felt his senses dim further bit by bit, until he was lost to bliss.

oooOOOooo

When Lupin called Snape back, he was cradled in Lupin's arms against his chest and the pulsing of the Cruciatus had faded to little more than pins and needles. It was unpleasant, but by no means painful. Lupin kissed Snape's hair and tightened his embrace slightly when he realised Snape was awake.

"My love," he said, his voice hoarse. "How do you feel?"

"On the mend," Snape said stoically, his strength improving, but slightly breathless, "thanks to you." He held Lupin's arms with his hands.

"Good, for the chef has prepared a Christmas Day broth for you," Lupin said with a smile that was somewhere between amused and appalled. Snape's brows knitted. He hadn't even thought of Christmas since the curse struck him. Why would he?

"Does that mean my Christmas dinner has been liquidised?" Snape asked with some trepidation. One of the things he had particularly looked forward to this Christmas was not having honey roast ham, turkey, topside of beef, several types of stuffing (sage and onion; chestnut; sausagemeat; garlic; lemon and thyme), chipolata sausages wrapped in bacon, potatoes: roast, mashed and croquette, carrot and parsnips wrapped in Parma Ham with a honey glaze and, not to forget, brussel sprouts.

With gravy.

He had given Tippy strict instructions: roast goose and gravy, prune and apple sauce with roast potatoes and red cabbage and some vintage elf-made red wine. And nothing else. No, nothing. No.

"Please let's have bread sauce, Severus!"

"Very well. No, nothing else. Nothing. No."

It had been a hard-fought negotiation.

"Tippy would never just liquidise a dinner she had prepared!" the bow at the end of the bed squawked with indignation.

Snape twisted his head to Lupin. "Even our house-elf sees fit to terrorise me," he said wryly, still feeling remnants of the delirium of the Kiss, the relief of no longer have a body racked with pain and, he realised, the light-headedness of hunger. He had had nothing since their breakfast early that morning. Lupin chuckled as Tippy, bearing an inordinately large tray, hoved into view with a silver soup tureen that Snape was sure they did not own and suspected might have a Hogwarts crest upon it.

"Tippy had only done some of the preparation for Christmas dinner when Professor Snape was summoned and so waited until it was safe to cook," Tippy informed them as she Conjured lap trays for them both, with napkins and cutlery and a jug of water and then dished up two bowls of soup, with fresh bread rolls. "While Master Lupin was healing Professor Snape, Tippy went back to Hogwarts kitchens and used Hogwarts Christmas dinner leftovers to make the soup. It is turkey and ham soup."

"You see, Remus, my goose is not yet cooked." Lupin grimaced at the pun.

oooOOOooo

"What time is it?" Snape asked woozily, having dozed off after Tippy's admittedly very tasty soup. Lupin still had hold of him, but was now undressed and in bed with him.

"Still Christmas Day, but only just. Why?"

"I need to get an owl to Narcissa. She got me to Spinner's End. She said she'd visit me tomorrow. Obviously, I won't be there," he said, making to get out of bed, but Lupin held on to him and Summoned parchment, a quill and ink and a lap writing desk and helped Snape to sit up and he scrawled a quick note:

I am safe. Stay where you are.

SS

He summoned Tippy to take it to Hogwarts Owlery to despatch it.

"Why didn't she stay with you? Try to heal you?" Lupin asked after Tippy had left.

"She risked a lot to get me home. The Dark Lord expects his – ah- examples to be left until they can make their own way home: it is part of our punishment. She didn't dare stay. I knew that. I called Tippy."

There was a long, dangerous silence, during which only their breathing could be heard.

"Are you listening to this? Can you hear yourself? How did you ever come to serve him, Severus? To make yourself slave to this ... this monster? Did you have no respect for yourself at all?" Lupin said quietly, his fingers of one hand pressing his temples.

Snape could not hide his distress as his eyes brightened but he turned to face Lupin.

"Do you think he was like this when I was first introduced to him? You think I am so lacking in self-worth? He was never kind or anything so mawkish. But he was inspirational, hypnotic, powerful. But he became this madman as his power increased. Once we were at war, and recruits were coerced rather than attracted, conscripted rather than volunteered – his attitude to his acolytes became more violent. I won't pretend however that there was a time that he was not violent – it was just –ah – not so frequent. Then he would leave us for weeks at a time and return looking less human and behave more viciously, as if his humanity were being sliced away piece by piece. By then, we were all in so deep, there could be no escape. We were still promised power, glory and riches, but it had also become a fight for our own survival. I can never make you understand how we were also expendable at that time. We were all pawns to the madman."

Snape had known this would come: Lupin's fear would become so great, his temper would fray and they would row. In a way, he took solace from it, but he hated to argue with Lupin when he felt so vulnerable. He knew after the fright, the recriminations would come for not keeping himself safe. He knew it was borne of worry, but what could he do?

"Why didn't you tell me he always summoned you on Christmas Day? I would have stayed – waited for you to return. Made sure you were safe." Lupin's voice was gentle now and he pulled Snape back into his arms, now facing him.

"I had not recalled it until it happened. I promise you I didn't deliberately keep it from you." Snape stroked Lupin's face.

"You may not have, but Albus remembered. I can't believe he didn't tell me. He should've told me."

"Albus doesn't think of the individual. He didn't send you to Grimmauld Place just to get you away from me, but to keep the image of both of us as solitary men and so you could be with your friend and his godson on Christmas Day and also to form part of Potter's guard to the hospital and he probably knew about the newly-Turned werewolf you spoke to. He doesn't miss much. It all feeds into his master plan."

Snape spoke matter-of-factly, although he had started to feel sickness rise in the pit of his stomach that Dumbledore had remembered, but had discounted Snape's safety as being of any consequence. He tried to shut the feeling out. Sometimes, he couldn't bear to recall that it wasn't only the Dark Lord who saw him as expendable.

"Don't you understand? What if he'd used the cutting curse on you, like before? You could have bled to death! We should have stayed at Spinner's End. Tippy could have fetched Poppy to heal you straightaway," Lupin stated crossly, his voice rising now. Snape moved away so he could look at him full on.

"If we'd been at Spinner's End, and Narcissa had brought me any later, she would have discovered you there! If 'if' and 'and' were pots and pans, there'd be no need of tinkers." Snape shouted back.

Lupin looked startled. "I have no idea what that means!"

"Oh, something my Muggle grandmother used to say. Deconstruct it – it makes sense." Snape waved a hand angrily at him, looking away.

"But what's a tinker?" Lupin said, clearly frustrated.

"What's a ..." Snape rolled his eyes. "It was an old name for gipsies. Some gipsy men worked iron to make pots and pans to sell and to mend and they were called tinkers, hence ..."

"Oh, I see," Lupin said, brow still creased. "You just deflected me, didn't you?"

Snape huffed impatiently. "What it means is: we could discuss different permutations all day, but ultimately, it's irrelevant. I see no purpose in continuing. It is what it is. The fact remains, it is safest here under the Fidelius if we're together and here we'll stay." Snape said, his jaw now firmly set. If anything, every time he himself was injured, it stiffened his resolve to keep Lupin safe. The prospect of Narcissa catching Lupin at home in Spinner's End kept playing over in his mind and it made him shudder with its lethal consequences. Narcissa and he got on well, but she wouldn't keep such information from her husband, and her husband would fall over himself to discredit Snape with the Dark Lord, he knew.

oooOOOooo

Dumbledore and Poppy had called in the morning and Poppy checked on Snape and was impressed by his recovery and had given Lupin's arm a squeeze, Snape thought to show she recognised his responsibility for it.

After she had left, Dumbledore took a seat with Snape. Lupin was still angry and paced the room constantly as the two men talked. Snape was very aware that Lupin was feeling impotent and anxious. Yet again, Lupin felt wrong-footed by the man he trusted like a father, and his mate had been put at risk.

"I'm shocked he expects you to have been able to start lessons so quickly. Even if you begged me, I would not bring Harry back to the school early. So the question has to be whether you are in danger between now and the start of term?"

"The Dark Lord has made his example of me now," Snape said dispassionately as Lupin stopped in his tracks and stared at him in horror. "I believe I am as safe as I can be – until the start of term."

"So, in that time, we must formulate how we can make Voldemort believe you are giving him what he wants, without giving him anything of the sort." Dumbledore took a cup of tea from Tippy. "Simple, really. Will you be able to find out what you missed while you were unconscious?" Dumbledore asked lightly.

"Albus!" Lupin hissed in shock. Snape held up his hand to catch Lupin's and hold it.

"It is not a homework group, Albus," Snape said snidely. "No-one will give me their notes." He sighed. "I will get what I can from Wilkes."

Snape could see that Lupin was still standing, listening unhappily to the conversation. A diversion was necessary.

"Albus," Snape said. "Tell me about Tippy. She seems remarkably collected in stressful situations. Self-composed. I have never met a house-elf like her."

Dumbledore smiled and looked at Snape over his glasses. "There are, of course, as many levels of intelligence amongst house-elves as there are amongst people. Most don't bother to listen to their house-elves to know how capable they are, and not just in the realms of domestic servitude." Dumbledore took a sip of his tea

"When I decided to ask a house elf to look after you both when you bonded, I made sure I asked one of the elves I knew to be articulate, intelligent and efficient, knowing your intolerance of any ineptitude or whimsy." Dumbledore's gaze met Snape's. "Tippy seemed to work so well, you even called on her after. When you had to be on your own in Spinner's End, I assigned Tippy to you because Voldemort proved his capacity for viciousness had not dimmed and you might have needed help. Of course, house-elves have the ability to enter and exit those places we magical folk cannot, and to find their masters. These are some of their best kept secrets – or perhaps – some of their many talents that are so wilfully ignored! I had a feeling these would be useful to you. As it turns out, she has proved her suitability both in temperament and ability and, if I may say, developed quite an affinity with her masters. She is, I think, one of my more inspired choices."

oooOOOooo

The following days were remarkably quiet. There were no Order meetings and no Death Eater gatherings and Dumbledore managed not to send Lupin on any guarding missions. Snape and Lupin spent the time in quiet contentment with each other, each day Snape's body recovering more fully whilst Lupin's inflamed protective instincts towards his mate relaxed slowly, although he had now firmly wrested control of their love-making from Snape as the full moon approached.

Lupin declined an invitation from Black to spend New Year's Eve "with everyone" at Grimmauld Place.

"Bring the wife!" Black had said in his Patronus invitation. Snape sent a hex at the luminescent canine Conjuration, pointless though he knew it to be, so furious was he. Lupin had pulled him onto the settee with him to kiss him as his silver wolf sprang from his wand.

The silver wolf loped away to deliver the message: "Busy."

Lupin turned his attention back to Snape. "Sometimes, Severus, economy is preferable to verbosity when dealing in the subtle art of the put-down."

"Did you want to be with him? It is New Year, after all."

"No, Severus. We've had this conversation before. Your side is where I should be, especially on our anniversary."

There had been vintage champagne, asparagus and poached eggs with Hollandaise sauce, and a platter of seafood, all prepared and set out by Tippy for their anniversary and then she Disapparated to Hogwarts for the night.

They only just finished the starter, before Lupin took Snape to the floor. Dominant, but attentive, Snape lost himself as Lupin took him using every technique and act he knew would fulfil every desire of Snape's, leaving him exhausted and sated.

When they had calmed, Lupin wrapped his hand around Snape's upper arm, around the circlet. "We have to check how we've done with our Circlets," Lupin said, reminding Snape of his intentions for the Circlets when Snape had first noticed that they had filigree additions to them, even after the first night of bonding.

Snape wrapped his long fingers around Lupin's upper arm, and Lupin did the same. Snape traced the patterns now gracing Lupin's Circlet. Of course, he had noticed the licks and curls that combined to make ornate arabesque curlicues which had accreted to the Circlet before, but he had never just looked at it as a thing in itself. The curlicues had indeed covered Lupin's upper arm from above the elbow to cover the whole of the bicep, just as Lupin had boasted they would. Snape thought it was a beautiful record of how much they had loved each other this year – beautiful as well because it was identical on both of them. They remained silent for a long time as their fingers investigated the filigree patterns, relishing the manifestation of their bond.

More happy than he thought he could ever be, Snape Levitated the seafood and set it out on the table cloth on the floor with the champagne and, as they fed each other oysters, prawns and lobster, Snape wondered how their next anniversary could possibly better this one.

Following the full moon, Lupin and Dumbledore had agreed that he would visit one of the packs in the West Country that Greyback had failed with. Lupin and Snape had agreed that Lupin would not spend longer than a week, shorter if it became in any way obvious the pack was intransigent or worse: hostile. There were many packs to visit, and Lupin did not have the luxury of time. Once more, they arranged to speak by the mirror each night but this time, Snape was taking no chances. He had taken Lupin's ordinary belt that he wore with his usual patched robes to Dumbledore as Secret Keeper and he had enchanted the buckle.

"There," Dumbledore said, passing back the belt, "the incantation is Porta ad domum. It will bring Remus through the Fidelius of the flat. Let's hope he doesn't have need of it. Now," he presented Snape with what appeared to a small brass curtain ring, "I have charmed this to alert you if the Portkey is activated so you can tend to Remus, if required. Also, if Remus goes missing again, whilst Tippy is inestimably reliable, there may be good reason you cannot use her to find Remus so: the incantation is Porta ad virum. It will take you to him. Let us hope, it does not take you into danger. Use it wisely, Severus."

oooOOOooo

The pack on Bodmin Moor was theirs! When Lupin had got there, he found an Alpha so outraged with the behaviour of Greyback and his pack that he had welcomed Lupin and within days of discussing Lupin's proposals, he had pledged the whole pack against the Dark Lord.

Lupin had returned to the flat, elated and yet exhausted, took a bath and then took Snape to bed for Snape to make love to him; to return him to the world of wizards rather than wolves.

Flush with the satisfaction of their love-making, Snape was disappointed to have to leave Lupin, who was now sleeping deeply, to visit Grimmauld Place as already arranged with Dumbledore with his letter.

oooOOOooo

Snape had let himself in and made his way to the library. He had told Lupin about the book he had started to look at, but had forgotten about it following Black's attack on him and the aftermath. He intended to pick it up today and they would study it together when their time allowed. It might also give him some ideas to help him with the invidious position he'd been placed in by his masters.

As he scanned the shelves, he became aware of Black watching him. He did not try to hide himself and his wand was not drawn, so Snape did not draw his.

"Black," he said, inclining his head.

"Snape," Black acknowledged. "Back at the Dark section, I see."

Snape's first instinct was to ignore him or make some sarcastic comment, but his conscience told him he should make something of an effort at conversation, even though the thought of it galled him. Lupin had put him first over and over again. He had nothing to fear from Black and everything to gain from facilitating his husband's happiness.

"I had been reading a book – Josephus Endor on Soul Magick – when ... that night," Snape felt his jaw muscle working at the unbidden memory but contented himself when he saw Black's face drain. "I was going to research your godson's scar."

"Oh," Black said, dropping his eyes to his feet. "Albus asked to borrow whatever I had ... he took all the books I had on soul and mind magic."

Snape exhaled in annoyance. This library had had an extensive collection and now these books had gone the way of the books from the Hogwarts Library – to Albus – never to be seen again.

"I see," he said shortly. It would mean another trip to Borgin & Burke then. "In any event, Albus has sent me to talk to Potter." He passed Dumbledore's rolled up parchment to Black. Black looked at it suspiciously and took his wand out to check it. Snape rolled his eyes and sighed heavily and meaningfully. He read it carefully, his mouth pursing. Then he dropped his hand to his side and stood uncomfortably as if deciding to what to do next.

"Did you and Remus have a good New Year?" Black asked, clearly trying to make conversation for the same reason as Snape had.

"Yes," Snape said, not wanting to tell this man it was their bonding anniversary. He knew Lupin had told him before and had assumed Black had chosen to ignore it when he issued his invitation that failed in its crass humour for New Year at Grimmauld Place.

"You managed to make it up after that rigmarole in November then? I wondered. What you said to him was pretty strong." Perhaps he had been just trying to make conversation, but Snape felt his blood boil immediately that Black should have heard that conversation, as private as a conversation could possibly be, especially after what Black had seen that night too.

"If listening at doors is how you get your pleasure, Black!" Snape snarled through gritted teeth, not wanting to be reminded how he had turned on Lupin and driven him back to the pack and wounded him so he neglected his Wolfsbane. If Black made one crack about what he had seen that night, Snape didn't think he could, or would want to, control his reaction. His wand hand twitched over his wand.

"If you don't want me to hear, perhaps a silencing charm! They're quite simple, you know," Black shot back. "But don't expect me to creep around my own house, Snape!"

Black strode out of the library. Snape inhaled deeply to calm his temper and then followed.

Molly Weasley was at the range (Where else? thought Snape) where she tended a huge stock pot with something superbly aromatic bubbling away inside.

"Hello, Severus!" said Molly, brightly. "Christmas holidays suit you. You're looking less peaky." Snape gave her a tight smile and had been about to respond when Black spoke, stiffly, still bridling.

"Molly. Would you get Harry please and then leave us for a while?"

"Of course, Sirius dear." Molly gave the stock pot one large stir and bustled off.

Black and Snape sat at the long kitchen table, glaring in opposite directions for what felt like a long time before the boy entered the kitchen. The silence between them was heavy with mutual dislike. A letter lay open on the table in front of Black.

'Er,' said Potter, to announce his presence.

Snape looked around him. The boy's usual eloquence, he thought.

'Sit down, Potter.'

'You know,' said Black loudly, leaning back on his rear chair legs and speaking to the ceiling. Snape thought how childishly easy it would be to hex those chair legs so the man ended up on his arse in front of the boy to whom he so wanted to show off. So very easy. He restrained himself. 'I think I'd prefer it if you didn't give orders here, Snape. It's my house, you see.'

Snape felt his face flush as the boy sat down next to his godfather, facing Snape across the table.

'I was supposed to see you alone, Potter,' said Snape, the familiar sneer curling his mouth, 'but Black –'

'I'm his godfather, said Black, louder than ever.

'I am here on Dumbledore's orders,' said Snape, whose voice, by contrast, was becoming more and more quietly waspish 'but by all means stay, Black, I know you like to feel … involved.'

'What's that supposed to mean?' said Black, letting his chair fall back onto all four legs with a loud bang. So easy, thought Snape smugly. His control is no better than his godson's.

'Merely that I am sure you must feel – ah – frustrated by the fact that you can do nothing useful,' Snape laid a delicate stress on the word, 'for the Order.'

It was Black's turn to flush. Snape's lip curled in triumph as he turned to the boy.

'The Headmaster has sent me to tell you, Potter, that it is his wish for you to study Occlumency this term.'

'Study what?' said the brat blankly.

Snape's sneer became more pronounced at this confirmation of the much vaunted Boy-Who-Lived's magical ignorance.

'Occlumency, Potter. The magical defence of the mind against external penetration. An obscure branch of magic, but a highly useful one.'

Snape could almost feel the boy's fear rising. He could pick up the boy's fear of possession. Perhaps he does have some understanding, then.

'Why do I have to study Occlu- thing? he blurted out. Or not, Snape thought with derision.

'Because the Headmaster thinks it a good idea,' said Snape smoothly. 'You will receive private lessons once a week, but you will not tell anybody what you are doing, least of all Dolores Umbridge. You understand?'

'Yes,' said Harry. 'Who's going to be teaching me?'

Snape raised an eyebrow. Does the brat think I am an owl, only fit for delivering messages on behalf of other teachers? Snape thought with mild affront.

'I am,' he said.

He watched his statement produce an almost electric effect on the boy who spun to his godfather for support.

'Why can't Dumbledore teach Harry?' asked Black aggressively. 'Why you?'

'I suppose it is a headmaster's privilege to delegate less enjoyable tasks,' said Snape silkily. 'I assure you I did not beg for the job.' Unfortunately, my life depends upon it, he thought to himself with disgust. He got to his feet. 'I will expect you at six o'clock on Monday evening, Potter. My office. If anybody asks, you are taking remedial Potions. Nobody who has seen you in my classes could deny you need them.'

He turned to leave, his black travelling cloak billowing behind him.

'Wait a moment,' said Black, sitting up straighter in his chair.

Snape turned back to face them, sneering.

'I am in rather a hurry, Black. Unlike you, I do not have unlimited leisure time.' He met Black's stormy stare with a smirk, knowing Black understood just how he wanted to spend that limited leisure time with his husband, who had chosen Snape over Black. He knew the knowledge burned him.

'I'll get to the point, then,' said Black, standing up. He was rather taller than Snape who … balled his fist in the pocket of his cloak over … the handle of his wand. It would be just like Black to try to put on a show for his godson, and since Black had never learned to fight fair, Snape was prepared. 'If I hear you're using these Occlumency lessons to give Harry a hard time, you'll have me to answer to.'

'How touching,' Snape sneered. 'But surely you have noticed that Potter is very like his father?'

'Yes, I have,' said Black proudly.

'Well then, you'll know he's so arrogant that criticism simply bounces off him,' Snape said sleekly.

Black pushed his chair roughly aside and strode around the table towards Snape, pulling out his wand as he went. Snape whipped out his own. They were squaring up to each other, Black looked livid and uncontrolled, Snape calculating, his eyes darting from Black's wand-tip to his face. He couldn't fail to note that Black appeared to have no notion of reading a caster's intentions from his wand movements.

'Sirius!' said Harry loudly, but Black was intent on trying to prove himself.

'I've warned you Snivellus,' said Black, his face barely a foot from Snape's so Snape could smell Firewhiskey on his breath. 'I don't care if Dumbledore thinks you've reformed, I know better –' Such a weak riposte – so transparently designed to denigrate me to the brat. Well two can play at that game, Snape thought angrily.

'Oh, but why don't you tell him so?' whispered Snape. 'Or are you afraid he might not take very seriously the advice of a man has been hiding inside his mother's house for six months?'

'Tell me, how is Lucius Malfoy these days? I expect he's delighted his lapdog's working at Hogwarts, isn't he?'

Snape's eyes narrowed. He knew what Black was referring to, even if it was completely over the boy's head. Pureblood shit. Well, I have some news for you that won't be welcome, courtesy of your friend, Pettigrew's big mouth.

'Speaking of dogs,' said Snape softly, 'did you know that Lucius Malfoy recognised you last time you risked a little jaunt outside? Clever idea, Black, getting yourself seen on a safe station platform … gave you a cast-iron excuse not to leave your hidey-hole in future didn't it?'

Black raised his wand as Snape levelled his own to Black's face.

'NO!' the boy yelled, vaulting over the table and trying to get in between them. 'Sirius, don't!'

'Are you calling me a coward?' roared Black.

'Why, yes, I suppose I am,' said Snape with as much malice as he could muster – such a perfect insult for a Gryffindor.

'Harry – get – out – of – it!' snarled Black, pushing him aside with his free hand.

At precisely the moment that Snape read Black starting to cast Incarcerous and he himself prepared a shield charm, the kitchen door opened and Snape heard, 'Cured! Completely cured!'

Arthur Weasley and the other Weasleys froze on the threshold, gazing at … Black and Snape looking towards the door with their wands pointing into each other's faces and the boy immobile between them, a hand stretched out to each, trying to force them apart.

'Merlin's beard,' said Mr Weasley, the smile sliding off his face, 'what's going on here?'

Both Black and Snape lowered their wands, looking at each other with utmost contempt, yet the unexpected entrance of so many witnesses brought them both to their senses. Snape pocketed his wand and swept back across the kitchen, seeing no-one else in his fury. At the door he looked back: he didn't want Potter using that fiasco as an excuse to assume the lessons were cancelled.

'Six o'clock, Monday evening, Potter.'

oooOOOooo

"Mmmmm, how did it go?" Lupin murmured, his eyes fluttering open as Snape got into the bed behind him, snaking his arms around Lupin's waist as he kissed Lupin's neck and shoulders.

"Could have gone better," Snape said, as his fingers drew up and down Lupin's chest making Lupin stretch out with pleasure, having no intention of being deflected from what he wanted, knowing Lupin would be disappointed he had lost control again. Well, that disappointment could wait. He had belated birthday presents to claim.

Next chapter: Occlumency
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