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The Reluctant Highlander	By : Tigerrr Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 15152 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
*******DISCLAIMER********* All characters either belong to
JKR or KMM, the only thing I�m in charge of is making them look stupid.

A/N: Well, I�m so
pleased that everyone is enjoying the story so far! I had to take a few days
off to update my SS/HG/LM because I was close to facing a riot over there at
the m/f section. I�ll try not to
disappoint anyone this chapter *bites nails anxiously* and I think it�s time to
find out what Ron and Harry are getting up to!

**********************************************************************

Hogwarts Castle

�D�you see her?� Ron
hissed to his friend. They were
currently hiding behind the heavy curtains in the Transfiguration classroom,
waiting for their chance to steal the book.
Unfortunately Professor McGonagall was not making it easy, as she was
constantly reading and re-reading it saying things like, �Oh, my stars!� or,
�Slytherins alive!� Harry was growing
desperate � they had to get Hermione out of there before the Potions Master got
naked in front of her again, no one should have to endure that twice � and was
rapidly reaching hysteria. He had heard
Dumbledore remarking that they had kissed at least once already, and Harry wanted
to Obliviate himself over it. She was
coming out of there if it was the last thing he did, he decided with a sharp
nod. Ah, finally! Ron nudged him. The Transfiguration Mistress
set the book down and walked to the door as a sharp knock echoed through the
room. He sent Ron up to the desk to
steal the tome and replace it with a bog-standard Harlequin enchanted to look
just like The Book, as the two Gryffindors had taken to calling it�they had
pilfered �Sleeping Bag Sojourn� from Dumbledore�s personal collection just last
week.

Their objective accomplished, they tucked The Book into
Ron�s pack and climbed back out of the window, racing to Gryffindor Tower
to see what had been happening. The
words were still steadily appearing, and it looked as if Professor Snape was
currently being waylaid by a trio of randy maids who had tied Hermione up in
the buttery so there would be no interruptions.
The Potions Master was making a good showing of it, even climbing a tree
to escape their clutches�and they never would have known that Hermione had such
words in her vocabulary if it weren�t being printed before their very
eyes. Harry dug out his quill and some
ink, looking thoughtful. �What should we
have happen to them? I�m thinking that
if we start writing things down, it will affect them in The Book. I say we mess
with that git.� On a whim, he replaced
the professor�s leather trousers with the kilt and continued with other
scenarios that he and Ron made up as they went along, roaring with laughter�their
original plan for a rescue slipping from their minds.

************************************************************************

The Book

Severus hauled himself up the tree quickly, trying to escape
the amorous serving maids yet again � why couldn�t they leave him alone? He�d
never given them so much as an ounce of encouragement! As he thanked Merlin for having the leather
pants to protect his legs (and other areas) from the branches, he set his feet
apart widely so that he could boost himself up further�as he did so, his pants
disappeared and he felt the familiar breeze that meant he had that damned kilt
back. A chorus of delighted and awed
gasps and shrieks confirmed this. Damn
it! He clamped his legs together firmly.
Hermione was definitely going to lose all her House Points, so many that it
would take ten years to replenish them.
Expulsion was certainly an option to consider, as well�and he would have
all the time in the world to do so, because there was no way he was going to
get down from here. He looked down and
saw that the entire female population of Castle Keltar was below the tree,
looking up hopefully.

****

Adam Black looked up from where he had been arguing with Sir
Gilderoy, who was still looking bedraggled from his foray into two feet of
water, even days later. Something was
wrong, very wrong�but what was it? His
eyebrows almost jumped off of his forehead as Gilderoy was suddenly dressed in
a black bowler hat, lime-green bustier, lacy orange skirt, and red pumps. �Did you mean to do that?� he enquired
between guffaws. The other man stomped
delicately and retorted that of course he hadn�t! �I ken it�s just Hermione,
then, lad. You look rather�bonny,� Adam
coughed. Of course. It had to just be the wee lass getting some
of her own back.

Gilderoy preened.
�You think so?�

*****

Hermione suddenly felt her ropes slacken, and she pulled her
hands out of them angrily. She had
enough of those maids already! Surely
the MacKeltars wouldn�t allow this to continue any longer once she told them. She charged through the buttery door and
outside where she saw a large crowd gathered around one of the large trees�was
that Severus up there? What in Merlin�s
name was he up to now�? She ran over to
demand that he come down when she heard the titters and the gossip.

�Did ye actually see
it, or were ye jus� imaginin� aught?�

�Nay � �tis an impressive sight indeed! Why Lady Granger�s no� by his side ev�ry
moment �tis beyond my ken!�

�How large did ye say�?�

Hermione broke in.
�Okay, everyone back to the castle � leave him alone! Severus, get down from there�are you a wizard
or not? Go on, you lot!� she shooed away
the crowd who grumbled and grudgingly dispersed, leaving her with the treed
wizard. �Why aren�t you wearing pants if
you�re going to climb trees? I swear,
you must really love the attention,� she scolded. He carefully made his way down, hanging onto
his plaid all the way so it wouldn�t get caught on any of the branches. She obediently closed her eyes when he caught
her looking up and ordered her to stop �right this instant.� I
swear, he�s worse than my mum, she thought irritably and sneaked a peek
anyway.

�Stop looking!� he
bellowed.

She turned her back on him to avoid the temptation of
looking up at Seriously Hung Slytherin.
She couldn�t help it, it was human nature to gawk at an impressive piece
of anatomy! Something rapped her hard on
the top of the head, and she jumped.
�Hey! Did you just throw something at me?�

�No, but I wish I had,� he retorted, finally dropping to the
grass with a sigh of relief.

************************************************************************

Hogwarts Castle

Ron was aghast � Hermione actually wanted to look up that big bat�s dress? Unbelievable!
He raised the quill from where he had just made something knock her on
the head (hopefully to her senses as well) and looked over at Harry, who was
making gagging noises. �I�m all for
writing him having a smaller dick,� he announced. Harry stopped retching and nodded
enthusiastically, and Ron dipped the quill in more ink. Preparing to lower it to the page, he was
startled into leaving a rather long smear across it as the door crashed open to
reveal a very angry McGonagall and a stern-looking Dumbledore.

�How dare you steal from me?� she demanded, swooping over to
snatch the book from Ron�s ink-stained fingers.
She scanned the pages, locating each spot where the boys had altered
details and pointed at them. �Do you see
this, Albus? Do you know what could have happened?� Her voice was shaking with anger.

Albus took a seat and regarded the trembling young wizards
solemnly. �Professor McGonagall is
right, Harry, Ron�if you had kept altering details before we discovered the
substitution, things could have turned out very badly for Miss Granger and
Professor Snape. They must follow the
storyline to its conclusion before allowed back into the real world. I realize
that you are, of course, worried about your friend�s welfare, but I assure you
that Professor Snape will take every precaution necessary to protect her and
return them both to Hogwarts.� His eyes
twinkled over the rims of his half-moon spectacles as he continued. �But
luckily, Minerva knew something was wrong when she read a passage concerning a
camp fire and the creative uses of marshmallows. Severus happens to detest them with a
vengeance ever since I forced the entire staff to go camping�but that�s a story
for another time, and another audience.�
He got to his feet and ushered Minerva out of the door so that she
wouldn�t beat the boys about the head with the book, and kept reminding her
that they didn�t use capital punishment all the way back to his office.

They hurried there and flipped open to the last printed
page, relieved to see that words were still popping up onto it. �Oh, look, Minnie � he�s in the kilt again!�
Albus exclaimed. The Gryffindor Head of
House had a fondness for her countrymen�s mode of dress, to the extent of
gifting him with a purple and red one on his last birthday. �Up a tree�!
Oh, my � he�ll think Hermione did it to him.� They read on avidly.

************************************************************************

The Book

�For the last time, Severus � I didn�t do it! Though you do
have nice legs.� She teased him probably just to hear the snarl he emitted with
increasing frequency these last few days.

Severus was glad that he still had his shirt intact � the
last time he hadn�t had one on, there had been alarming consequences. Alarming, confusing, and�not entirely
unpleasant consequences. He kept
thinking of her hands resting on his chest as she craned her neck for his kiss
� what on earth had made him give it? Probably just a temporary brain fever,
he tried to convince himself. He wished
it would come over him again, watching her hips sway in front of him as they
walked back to the castle. A gust of
wind made his plaid flip up just as she glanced back over her shoulder and he
cursed as he tugged it back down � she probably thought he did it on
purpose! Like you didn�t notice how she was looking at you in the bath? He shook his head sharply to clear it of such
maddening thoughts and made a section of his long hair swing around and whip
him in the face. He resolved to cut it
off, along with the beard, as soon as they got back inside where he could
borrow a knife.

For a wonder, he wasn�t molested by his �fan club,� as
Hermione called them, and made it to his rooms without incident where he began
to grasp handfuls of his hair and shear it off with the blade Drustan had
loaned him. It was finally at the normal
length he maintained it at, just at his shoulders, and he carefully began to
shave. He almost sheared his nose off in
surprise when the irritating little witch popped in to see what he was doing,
and though he yelled fiercely, she didn�t seem to be scared at all. She just took the blade from his hands, told
him to sit up straight and not to move, and announced she was going to do it
for him. She gave a little scowl and a
slap when he tried to protest, so he subsided with ill grace and fixed her with
the �detention for three years� look which she had the nerve to ignore. As she carefully scraped the last of the hair
from the side of his cheek, she washed off the last of the soapy foam with a
dampened cloth and stared at him.

�Now you look like yourself again � your hangers-on won�t
appreciate it,� she mused with a smile.
He was set to give a stinging reply when her fingers came up to stroke
his face, sending tingles through his entire body. �It�s�a lot smoother than when we�� she passed
her index finger over his lips, moving closer and closer until she was astride
his thighs. Hermione�s eyelashes
flickered and her breathing came faster � somehow his arms had crept around her
again � as she began to run her lips over the freshly shaven skin of his face. Ummm�student? The irritating voice reminded him. He told it to go to hell, slid his hands over
her body, and sought her lips with his as he pitched reason out of the window
for the second time in as many days.

Their second kiss was fiery with passion, full of desire,
and rife with heat. He didn�t care where
she had learned to kiss like this, but would be sure to send the other wizard a
thank-you note. The witch slid her hands
into his hair, scraping her nails lightly against his scalp just how he liked
it, and moaned into his mouth as their tongues twined and twirled
together. She freed one hand to grab one
of his and thrust it imperiously inside her blouse, then tugged on her skirt
and his kilt.

**********

Hermione couldn�t believe she was doing this with her
Potions professor. With a man who obviously doesn�t mind at all, she amended as a
mental image of Chloe and Gwen popped into her head, their fingers waggling in
admonition. She kissed him fiercely as
he rolled her nipples against his palms and tugged on them gently, making her grind
down against him. She pulled her skirt
as well as his plaid up so that his arousal sprang free, and she moved so that
he was placed directly against the vee of her thighs. Severus pulled away and looked down at her
with a wild look on his face, and she braced her feet on the floor to rub
against him in answer to the question in his eyes. He released her breasts to slide his hands
around to the small of her back, bidding her to lean back. Just as his mouth brushed her heated flesh, a
knock came at the door.

�Whu�What is it?� she croaked as Severus pressed her down
and rubbed the length of his shaft against her cleft. He continued to lick and suck on her breasts
and neck, murmuring for her to just tell whoever it was to go away. Hermione curled her arms around the back of
his head so that she wouldn�t fall unceremoniously off of his lap and repeated
the demand after clearing her throat.

�Um, it�s Chloe and Gwen�we�we just wanted to let you know
that lunch would be ready in five minutes,� came the embarrassed reply. Why should they be embarrassed? She flushed.
Oh. This was �Laird Raven�s�
bedchamber, not hers! She gave him a
swat on the shoulders that made him look up with a classic �What did I do?�
look on his face. The giggles in the
corridor effectively cooled her ardor and made her realize that she was about
one millimeter away from student-teacher sex.
�We can�t do this, Severus,� she panted as he pressed on her hips again.

�Yes we can, you heard as well as I did that we�ve got five
minutes,� he protested.

She rolled her eyes. �That�s
all you need?� she asked disparagingly.

�Well, no...� at least the man had the grace to look embarrassed. She eased away from him and hauled her skirt
back down from around her waist and he laced her blouse back up for her, not
meeting her eyes.

�Look, Severus�this is all kind of sudden, don�t you think?
I mean, until a few days ago you were yelling at me for helping Neville
Longbottom not blow himself into smithereens and now here we are, acting as
randy as all get out! Maybe if we just
take it slow for a while, you could take me out somewhere and we could get to
know each other better,� she said in a rush.
An errant thought popped into her head. Fuck that, just fuck him.

He quirked an eyebrow at her. �Take you out? Where, to the peat bog? Be serious.�
It was obvious that he was coming to his lust-crazed senses as well, but
it was still taking a while � all that blood had to rush back up into his other
head first. They finally made an
agreement to go out on �dates� (the very word made Severus snort in derision)
before doing something as rash as having wild intercourse on a rickety old
chair.

************************************************************************

Adam Black folded his arms and glowered at the two
women. �You couldn�t have waited just a
bit longer to announce lunch? They were nearly tupping,� he complained. Chloe and Gwen glared right back at him.

�The object of this whole game is to make them fall in love with each other, not just lust
after each other like two male prison inmates in a secluded cell! They either have to get married or Hermione
has to be pregnant by him before they can leave, but let�s not forget they must
be in love! Back off the lust potions in
their food a little, Adam,� Gwen ordered sternly. Another woman wouldn�t have made such a
mistake, knowing that a loveless marriage was wrong and that Hermione certainly
wouldn�t appreciate having a child by a man who didn�t love her. Yet.
She knew that Severus Snape was very, very close to it, though he had no
idea of it�the Slytherin wizard and the Gryffindor had practically been tailor
made for each other. She thought that
Hermione would figure it out first, and then beat her surly professor over the
head with it until he capitulated.

�We�ll take over for now, Adam,� Chloe told him. �Women have more of a sense for these kinds
of things.�

He threw up his hands and left them to it.

************************************************************************

A/N: Aren�t I just
the biggest tease? Hee hee. That�s two kisses down, ladyofthemasque! And the hair is officially history�but I just had to bring back the kilt, I missed
it.
- 6
- 7
- 8
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The Reluctant Highlander