Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

You Will Not Kiss Me	By : Prosperosdaughter Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 22836 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: JK Rowling & her associates own the Harry Potter universe and I make no money from my stories.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
Chapter 7: Fear of Discovery

Snape was vaguely aware on waking that Lupin had left the bed and then returned to it. The bathroom seemed to be a good idea, so he made the same visit and then flopped back into bed. Not quite the outrageous hangover they'd both had a few days ago, but enough to leave him feeling rather woolly. However, he was awake now and he knew he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep this morning.

He looked at Lupin, who had gone straight back to sleep, with the covers thrown off him. He looked much more rested than he had yesterday, although still care-worn, even in sleep. T he past two days had clearly taken their toll. It was hard to credit the man was only in his early thirties, Snape thought. His thick brown hair was liberally flecked with grey, making him look older than he was. Transformations were traumatic to the human body and obviously drained Lupin's magical and physical core. Snape felt more than a twinge of pity for him.

He sat on the bed, and moved his way slightly towards the foot of the bed so he could take in the sight of Lupin fully, without being observed himself. Snape found Lupin so very attractive: he had a handsome, regular face, and his blue eyes entranced Snape. He found Lupin's mouth, with its full lips that seemed to almost permanently reside in a small smile, eminently sexy. His own dreams would often start with that mouth and what it felt like to kiss those soft lips and what those soft lips did to him. There had been a very good reason that he told Lupin not to kiss him in their first encounter: ultimately, Snape found kissing so powerfully attractive because he really hadn't had much experience of it as an expression of tenderness or passion and he found it very erotic. Kissing could enervate his senses in a way he would not have credited before.

His eyes wandered over Lupin's body and he took in his broad shoulders and chest, his flat stomach, his beautifully taut arms and legs. In his mind's eye, he was kissing every part of Lupin's body. He recalled seeing in Lupin's mind his admiration and longing for Snape; how this man wanted him and, knowing with certainty that Lupin desired him, made Snape feel ... just extraordinary. A small moan escaped from him at the thought. Snape's chest felt uncomfortably full and his stomach started to churn with desire as his blood pooled to his groin once more.

He was close to being overwhelmed by his desire again. But ... but... as beautiful as he was finding Lupin right now, Snape did not want intercourse. Not right now. Not yet. They were both still recovering from their injuries and Snape hadn't managed his memories properly yet. If he had sex now, he was sure he would entrench those memories of being brutalised by the wolf. But he needed to show Lupin he still wanted him, and trusted him as well has needing something physical for himself too. If he didn't reassure Lupin, he was sure that the viciousness of that encounter would overwhelm Lupin. It was important to Snape that the wolf should not win – every day lost was a day won by the wolf.

He looked longingly at Lupin again, who sighed and turned slightly in his sleep. He found he very much wanted to touch, no to taste Lupin's body. This surprised him. It was something he normally didn't care to do, undoubtedly because of his experiences when he was younger when he had been forced to do it, but also because whenever a lover had done this to him, it was rough, scratchy and vaguely unpleasant. But when Lupin had done this to him the other night, he had positively tantalised him to the extent that Snape thought he would lose his mind in the exquisite pleasure he had felt. It seemed to Snape to be the most natural thing in the world to do at this particular moment to show this man what he felt right now.

He moved nearer to Lupin and placed his hands gently on Lupin's stomach, stroking the skin upwards to his chest and softly kissed his breast bone up to the hollow in his neck, moving down again he slowly traced his tongue along Lupin's midriff to his navel. Lupin woke with a moan and his hands travelled in Snape's hair gently, encouraging him with soft sighs at every new touch. All the time, his hands were caressing Lupin's chest and his fingers rubbed his now hard nipples.

His mouth travelled to Lupin's hip, drawing in the hip bone to gently suck on it and kissing across to do mirror the caress on the other side, taking in Lupin's increasing gasps of pleasure. Then he moved his hands to hold Lupin's hips firmly, and he gently touched the tip of Lupin's erection with his lips then flicked it gently with his tongue, recalling how Lupin had pleased him and replicating it, listening to Lupin's breath hitch on that first touch. He licked hard down up and down the shaft and then took him inch by inch in his mouth, still using as much of his tongue as he was able. Lupin was groaning now and writhing softly under him, one hand in Snape's hair and the other on his back, and Snape's own erection had become desparately hard. He was hardly able to believe the increase in desire he felt knowing he was inciting the same in Lupin.

Then he found Lupin's hands pulled Snape's hips around and Lupin himself turned on his side so that their bodies now faced each other. Lupin placed both hands around Snape's hips and pulled him towards his own mouth and took his erection in, sucking him greedily. It took all Snape's control not to release immediately. He moaned against Lupin's erection in his own mouth, finding that too made Lupin groan in response, vibrating against his cock. It was almost more than he could bear. They mirrored each other's greed, pulling each other's erections in and out of their mouths, using lips and tongues and nipping with their teeth, and massaging with their hands to increase the friction and pressure.

Snape's was finding it almost impossible to maintain any concentration and difficult to maintain any rhythm, so he manoeuvred Lupin over him so that he was directly underneath him, hoping Lupin would take the lead with his own thrusts into Snape's mouth. He did, thrusting slowly into Snape's mouth which welcomed him as much as his own distracted body could allow and Lupin also worked against Snape's own cock hungrily and deeply. Both were utterly breathless and slick with sweat, the noise from both no more than guttural moans of pleasure. Snape could no longer stop himself and his fingers dug into Lupin's hips hard as he came into Lupin's mouth, quickly followed by Lupin releasing himself. Both men took each other's hot seed, swallowing, draining and moaning with primal satisfaction for the release. Lupin relaxed onto his side next to Snape and then laid his head on Snapes's stomach, breathing deeply. Snape laid his head on Lupin's hips, feeling completely boneless, his mind full of hot fog and trying to steady his breathing. They both stared unseeing at the ceiling for a while, minds coming back into focus.

Then Lupin sat up, leaned forward and drew Snape into an embrace and kissed him deeply, his tongue tasting them both.

"Good morning Severus," Lupin smiled cheekily as he released him from the kiss, but not from his arms.

"Isn't it," Snape said silkily. They kissed luxuriously for some time.

"I didn't expect..." Lupin started, but Snape kissed him to stop the rest of the sentence.

"I wanted that very much. I needed it too," he breathed in Lupin's mouth. "But I don't know how long before I can..." This time Lupin kissed him quiet.

"Whenever you're ready," Lupin said, still kissing him.

They only broke off because Snape pointed out that Poppy might check on Lupin again this morning. It was coming up to 8 in the morning and Snape didn't think he'd be able to think of an explanation for Poppy if he were still here when she came, although he wasn't completely sure she was fooled yesterday.

He and Lupin agreed that they would go down separately to breakfast. Between them, they cast various charms to clean the room of bottles and glasses, and change the bed linen. Snape cast a freshening charm on the room when Lupin commented that it smelt like a bordello on a Sunday morning.

"I wouldn't know," he drawled with a smirk. Lupin chuckled.

They kissed deeply again then Snape dressed, although he didn't tie his cravat or don his outer robe. He watched admiringly as Lupin wandered naked to the bathroom then he took the Floo to his own quarters to shower.

What he did not expect was to find Dumbledore waiting for him in his drawing room. Dumbledore had his back to the fireplace investigating the contents of Snape's bookshelves as Snape came through. Snape rushed to close his shirt neck as the Headmaster turned to greet him.

"Ah, Severus," Dumbledore smiled, quickly turning back to the book shelves. Snape hurriedly tied his cravat, although he knew Dumbledore had probably seen what he was trying to hide. "After breakfast, I would like to call on your expertise, if I may."

"Of course, Albus. What is required?" Snape was now composed, although he realised he probably looked flushed and dishevelled.

"Harry Potter has received a gift of a Firebolt anonymously. Minerva suspects Sirius Black sent it to him. Before Filius and Rolanda strip it down, I'd like you to check it for Dark magic."

Snape's mouth thinned and he nodded curtly. Trust Potter to ruin his plans for the day.

"Good, good," Dumbledore peered at Snape over his glasses. "Come to my office after breakfast if you will, Severus. Now, I'll leave you to ... er ... clean up." Dumbledore quickly took in Snape's appearance, and then left by Floo.

Snape was furious. How dare he wait in his rooms, knowing Snape wasn't there. He knew, he just knew, that Dumbledore had seen the bites on his neck, his high colour and his dishevelled appearance and will have connected the dots as only Albus bloody Dumbledore could do. Insufferable man, he knew! Snape's mind screamed at him.

His temper suddenly froze. Their research! Where was it? He strode to his desk and exhaled deeply. He'd forgotten that he'd locked it, with the book, in his desk on Christmas Eve. He didn't believe Dumbledore would stoop so low as to break into his desk. However, if it had been on the desk, nothing could have stopped him. He breathed deeply a couple of times, but he was still angry and went to his shower, far less relaxed than he had been ten minutes ago.

He only saw Lupin briefly at breakfast as Lupin had come to breakfast later, with Poppy, so those two had sat together.

Snape made sure his mind was well Occluded as he joined Dumbledore in his office, and they had a cup of tea whilst they waited for Minerva to bring the Firebolt.

"Is it Remus?" Dumbledore suddenly enquired, as Snape took his cup and saucer from the tray on the desk.

Snape replaced the crockery on the table carefully and sat very straight to look directly at Dumbledore challengingly.

"Albus..." he started, intending to tell him to mind his own business, but Dumbledore cut across him, unusual in itself.

"Under any other circumstances, not only would I not ask, but I couldn't be more delighted, if somewhat astonished given your unflinching distaste for Remus previously. But Severus," Dumbledore's tone was low and confidential, "I believe you are physically harming each other. Since I know you both, and that this kind of damaging behaviour is not in the nature of either of you, I am asking if there is anything I need to know or if you need my help?" Dumbledore was leaning forward in his chair, peering intently at Snape.

"I don't know what you mean, Albus," he said coolly, although he was completely unsettled.

Dumbledore spoke very slowly and deliberately, never looking away from Snape as he did so, his blue eyes piercing Snape's, looking for understanding. "I not only saw the injuries on your neck before breakfast, Severus, rather distinctive injuries, if I may say so, but I saw your face at Christmas Eve dinner, so recently healed, and noted how you held yourself at the table. It was clear you had other injuries. You will, of course, admit that I had reason to become accustomed to how you hid your injuries all those many years ago." Dumbledore returned the look of challenge. "

"Then, of course, there are Remus's injuries. The hex to his hand, the damage to his ribs and back. I detected magic on those. I believe you inflicted them in self defence, Severus. Am I right?" His voice was gentle and supportive.

"Albus," Snape breathed deeply. "Please. It is our business. I ask you not to pry," he said softly. What can I possibly say that will not make me sound either like some kind of glutton for battery, or a Dark wizard who's enslaved a werewolf causing his very being to fracture? There is nothing I can tell him that doesn't damn me! He was going to say that it wouldn't happen again, except that sounded so ... weak and unbelievable, even if he believed it himself with all his heart.

"You were always a difficult man to help, Severus. If you change your mind, do not think twice to call on me." Dumbledore sat back in his chair. "Minerva is coming."

Minerva walked in briskly with the offending broomstick following her by levitation.

"Albus, Severus," she nodded and motioned for the broomstick to rest itself on Dumbledore's desk. "Of course, Mr. Potter is desperate to get the broom back so he can fly it, but I can't think of anyone that would send the boy such an expensive broom anonymously and heaven knows Sirius Black can afford it! It would be a simple matter to hex it to injure the boy, but I'm worried there may be Darker enchantments, Severus."

"Such a fuss," Snape snorted, his mask in place perfectly. "There could be any number of worshippers of the boy-who-lived who would make such a foolish gift. It could have been anyone. Nevertheless," he sighed dramatically, "I will assist." Minerva rolled her eyes.

Under the interested gaze of Minerva and Dumbledore, Snape removed his wand and passed it slowly over the broom several times, occasionally levitating it to pass his wand underneath and around it, chanting softly all manner of revealing incantations for Dark magic. As he did so, Dumbledore also sat, as if mesmerised, following Snape's wand movements and chanting himself. As Snape was about to start his final incantation, he noticed Dumbledore shoot Snape a sharp glance. It was remarkably brief, but Snape knew he hadn't imagined it. Dumbledore had sensed something; not with the broom but with him. His stomach knotted, but he continued.

It took over an hour, but finally Snape pronounced the Firebolt devoid of any Dark enchantment that he knew and took his leave. He nodded to both Minerva and Dumbledore and strode away.

What on earth had Dumbledore seen about Snape in his revealing incantations? Had he discovered the Thrall? If not, then what? He felt his panic rising and he felt nauseous again. He got to his quarters feeling wretched. The day had started so perfectly and had just spiralled out of his control completely.

He resolved to work on repairing his memory matrix that he'd started before Christmas. He'd neglected it what with all that had happened and there was no time like the present and he very much needed to be in control of himself if Albus Dumbledore thought something was off with him. He called for lunch in his room, undressed to his shirt sleeves and trousers, and then began his meditation.

He had worked very hard through his mental Occlumency exercises and hardly noticed how much time had passed. He had missed dinner but he wasn't really concerned. He was satisfied that he'd done well this afternoon.

There was a gentle knock on his door. He opened it to find Lupin, leaning against his door frame with a cotton drawstring bag in his hand. Snape flushed with the sudden, unbidden memory of this morning and it warmed and clenched his stomach. "Come in Remus," he said warmly.

"I haven't seen you all day, Severus, or lunch or dinner. I know you got roped into looking at Harry's Firebolt, but I thought I might have seen you by now. Is everything well?" Lupin followed him in.

"I've had a strange day. Sit. It concerns you too." Snape said, in a distracted manner, and indicated the chairs before the fireplace. "I could do with a drink. Would you like one?"

"Yes please Severus." Lupin removed his outer robe and sat, looking expectantly at Snape. Snape poured them both a drink.

Snape told Lupin about his conversation with Dumbledore. He saw Lupin's face drain and then Lupin knocked back his Firewhiskey in one. Snape knew Lupin was not just thinking about the Thrall but about his assault on himself. Dumbledore had known Snape had had to defend himself. Lupin worshipped Dumbledore like a father. He would be mortified that he thought him capable of assaulting Snape. He noticed Lupin's hands trembled as he topped up his glass.

"Severus," Lupin voice sounded strained, "even though I know Albus has something akin to preternatural acuity, that is truly unsettling."

"That's not all of it. I was asked to examine that broomstick that was sent to Potter for Dark curses. As I conducted my investigations, Albus was doing likewise and... " Snape paused to breathe deeply ".. I think he discovered something about me. But I do not know what – just the way he looked at me." He looked to Lupin, he realised, for reassurance. How had it happened that he was looking to Lupin for reassurance? He sat, facing Lupin. "Perhaps there is a trace of the Thrall. If Albus thinks I have cast a Dark enchantment of this nature, Remus, I don't believe he will spare me Azkaban ..." Snape's voice dropped to a whisper.

There, he had said it. His absolute fear that Dumbledore would discover this Dark enslavement magic and put him out of Hogwarts – put him in Azkaban. Without Albus, there would be no-one to speak for him.

Lupin reached for his hands and held them firmly. "You did not cast it. You know you did not. Perhaps he detected the trace of it, but not the casting of it."

"Perhaps," he agreed, not wanting repeat his fear out loud. He squeezed Lupin's hands in return, noting that Lupin looked nervous, even haunted, and cursed himself for telling him any of it. He thought he had made real progress this morning in assuring Lupin of his trust in him. But now, he could see the wolf's attack was preying on Lupin's mind once more. Dammit, this was not what he wanted. Now they were both unnerved.

"Remus, come and sit with me," he said softly. Lupin moved over to him and sat between Snape's legs, leaning against them. Snape ran his fingers through Lupin's hair and kissed the top of his head, hoping it would calm him. He got off his chair and sat behind Lupin, with his legs either side of him and wrapped his arms around his chest. He could feel Lupin's heart beating hard, nearing panic.

"Remus, please don't fret this way," he murmured in his ear and kissed it gently. Lupin leaned into the kiss. "Promise me, not to fret. I thought we had understood what that was between us. You and I. Remus," he murmured still, becoming aware himself that his voice had taken on an hypnotic quality. He murmured Remus's name over and over again in his ear, slightly rocking with him. He felt through his arms, Lupin's heart-beat slow and his breathing ease until his whole body started to relax into Snape's arms.

Once he felt Lupin had relaxed again, he loosened his arms and then he pointed to the cloth bag on the table. "What's this?"

Lupin shook his head as if waking from a day dream (that is interesting, thought Snape). "My chess pieces," he said brightly. "Thought you might like a game. Boxing Day type of thing to do, I thought." Lupin smiled at Snape.

"Now then, Mr. Lupin," Snape got up and collected his chess board and pieces, "you have yourself a match," he said firmly as he set up the board on his coffee table with a smirk. As Lupin set up his own pieces, smiling, as if he didn't have a care in the world, Snape wondered at the change his chanting Lupin's name had wrought. He had not expected that but everything about this Thrall surprised him.

"Do you play much, Severus" Lupin asked mildly.

"I do," Snape replied, confidently. "Do you?"

"Gryffindor House champion, Severus," Lupin chuckled.

"Really?" Snape raised an eyebrow witheringly. "For the honour of our Houses then?" Snape challenged, producing the Firewhiskey with a flourish.

"Challenge accepted," Lupin slapped the table emphatically and held out his glass for a refill grinning broadly.
- 6
- 7
- 8
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

You Will Not Kiss Me