Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Whiskey Colored Eyes	By : tbird1965 Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 7429 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
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Snape is sinking further and further into depression...please read and review.

Hermione sighed heavily as she snatched her now familiar instruction note from the dungeon door. It had been 4 days now. She had caught glimpses of Professor Snape, in the great hall and in his classroom, but for the most part, he had managed to completely avoid her, almost as if she no longer existed.

Snape was trying everything he could think of to stave off the feelings that were building inside of him. When he had first come to the realization that she had lied to him and betrayed his trust, his overwhelming fury had overshadowed any other feelings. But as his initial fury began to wane, other more frightening emotions seemed to be waiting in the wings to take its place. Feelings of loneliness, despair, anxiety, emptiness. A painful emptiness that he feared might actually consume him if he allowed it to run unchecked inside of him.

Rising from his bed, he walked over to his dresser. Lifting the bottle of whisky to his lips he sucked out the last drops, before tossing the empty bottle aside. Pulling open the top drawer, he removed another bottle only to discover it too was empty. Cursing under his breathe, he stalked to his private potions cabinet. Yanking it open, he rummaged through it, only to discover that he had already emptied it of any potions capable of numbing his building emotions.

Glancing at the clock, he realized that it was the middle of the night. Pulling on a pair of black lounging pants he left his room and walked quietly to the kitchen.

When he reached the door, he was surprised to see light. Glancing in, he saw that Hermione was sitting at the small table, her back to the door, and her head in her hands. A forgotten cup of tea sat beside her. He hadn't really seen her since the day in the Headmistress' office. His breath caught in his throat when he noticed the large dark bruises on her arms. Bruises the exact shape and size of his own, large hands. His mind flashed to the image of him grabbing her up and screaming into her face, shaking her by her arms. Guilt settled into his stomach to take up residence with all the other emotions he couldn't bare to face.

Hermione lifted her head from her hands. She had a feeling she was no longer alone. Turning quickly, she was shocked to see Professor Snape standing in the kitchen doorway. He was dressed in a pair of black lounging pants and his bare chest almost glowed in the light. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it quickly at the impassive look on his face. He strode past her into the kitchen and pulled open a cabinet door. Reaching in, he took out a small potion bottle. She watched as he flicked the cap off with a practiced ease before upending the bottle and drinking its entire contents. Tossing the empty bottle in the sink, he turned and left the kitchen.

Hermione sat staring into space for a long time after the rapid appearance and disappearance of Professor Snape. Finally her curiosity got the best of her. Walking to the sink she reached in and pulled out the empty potion bottle. She had never seen it before and it was not labeled. Sniffing it, she was still unable to discern what it had contained. Knowing that she would be unable to sleep, Hermione carried the empty bottle to the dungeon. Setting at her work station she lit a small fire under her cauldron.

Slamming his door, Snape entered his bedroom and lay down on his bed. Turning on his side, he curled up in a tight ball, his arms crossed protectively across his stomach. He tried desperately to ignore the painful ache inside of him. Rocking gently he began to recite all of the potions in his storeroom while he waited for the potion to take effect and plunge him into blissful emotional and mental oblivion.

'Aconite, Acromantula Venom, Agrippa, Angel Trumpet….'

The painful image of Hermione Granger staring up at him with desire and lust, visions of her bruised arms.

'Baneberry, bat spleen, beetle eyes, belladonna, bezoar….'

Olie purring against his hand, the feel of her silky coat as he petted her, the feel of her dying body cradled in his arms.

'Ginger, Goosegrass, Graphorn horn, Griffen claw, Haliwinkles'

The images were getting fainter now. Lily Evans sitting with him as they played silly, childish games, Lily walking away from him, laughing at him. James Potter sneering….

'Honeywater, Horklump juice, horse hair…'

Snape's thoughts grew quiet and his posture eased as he slipped into a painless and a dreamless sleep.

Sitting back on her stool, she glanced over the list of ingredients * she had decanted and tossed the notebook aside. Hermione reached up and wiped her eyes, trying to catch the tears that threatened to fall.

*Snape is self medicating to try and ease the pain. I haven't listed the ingredients Hermione finds in the potion, but imagine a strong Wizard form of Valium or Xanax.
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