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Frozen Love	By : Emeline Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 9129 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
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A/N: this chapter was supposed to be longer, but I decided I had already spent way too much time on this part.
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Thrnbrooke: new chapter is up. I hope you enjoy it.
Katina: huzzah! I�ve updated!
Cas: mios Dios, thank you very much.
Evila: much is revealed here, so read on. Thanks for reviewing.
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Now I�m supposed to understand
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Don�t you think you�re asking too much?
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What kind of fool do you think I am?
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Don�t you think you�ve hurt me enough?
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�So I was never supposed to find out,� Alyssa said
quietly. �I was never supposed to find out that Morgana Fontaine never existed;
you were never going to tell me the truth.� She forced herself to look at Mr.
Malfoy. The sight of him shot white-hot pain through her. Here was the one who
had abandoned her. �You�re who she was made to replace.�

Her gaze drifted over to her
father. �And you, you lied to me. You took my whole life and made it a lie.� He
tried to speak. �No. No, no. I don�t want to hear anything about it not being a
lie. It was.� Alyssa stared at the two men before her, wishing that something
could make her understand. �You�re caught. Now you have to tell me what
happened.�

Her father again tried to speak:
�Alyssa, I don�t��

�I�m sure it�s going to be the most
painful thing I�ve ever heard,� Alyssa sharply interrupted. �But you�ve wounded
me. You might as well finish me off.� The sting of her own words turned on her
as she saw into her father�s eyes. She looked away.

He took a long time to speak. �It
was a long time ago.�

Even those few words froze the
blood in Alyssa�s veins. It was the implication that really got her. �Oh, God.
You had a relationship and then you went your separate ways, didn�t you?� Her
eyes settled on him again, and she knew before he spoke.

�Yes.�

�How long was it? A year? A month?�
The words rolled out of her mouth without her bidding. She did not regret them.
She regretted what she saw in her father�s expression. It was pure guilt. He
never could hide what he was feeling.

But he did not speak, and it became
clear that her estimates were too high. A blur of emotions swept through her,
making it impossible for her to understand what she was feeling. �No. It was
just one night,� Alyssa said. It was a statement, and not a question.

Her father still did not speak. And
as for Mr. Malfoy, it was as if he was not there. It was rather fitting.

�Were you� drunk?� She knew that
tears would soon come to her. She packed them down into the dark hurt that was
pulsing within her.

�No, of course not,� her father
said.

Alyssa tried to bring back the
shocked anger she had felt in the first moment of confrontation, but it shrank
from dominance. �Then why did it�why did I happen?�

Her father let out a long breath.
�I don�t think you can really understand that.�

�I came to him,� Mr. Malfoy
suddenly said. Alyssa involuntarily looked at him. �I was looking for something
I couldn�t find in myself. He was the only person I could think of going to.�

�What were you looking for?� Alyssa
wanted his answer to make up for the hurt. She needed something to hold on to.

�Hope. I needed to see proof of
goodness.� Mr. Malfoy glanced at her father for but the briefest moment. She
did not understand that gaze.

�What about love? Was there any
love?�

Neither man answered; they looked
to each other.

�Was there love?� Alyssa repeated
with greater strength.

�Yes,� her father softly said.
�There was.�

So many questions, so many
accusations, were welled up within Alyssa, yet she only gave release to one
question. �If there was love, where were you, Mr. Malfoy? Where were you?�

�I wasn�t there for you. I ran from
what I had started.� This was stated as a confession, yet whose forgiveness did
he seek?

He ran; he had admitted it. A
confused anger squirmed within her, unable to cry out loud but unwilling to
die. �But why?� Alyssa whispered. She was ashamed of that voice, and of the
tears in her eyes.

�I wasn�t ready. I was afraid of��
Mr. Malfoy paused, seeking the true answer. �Forever. I feared putting myself
in two lives forever. I knew that every decision I made and everything I did
would directly affect two people. I chose to run before forever began.�

The anger rose up and found a
voice. �Coward,� Alyssa said, pouring every bit of emotion into that one word.
�Coward!�

Mr. Malfoy accepted the word and
the emotion behind it. �That is true.�

The turmoil inside her would not
cease. Alyssa turned away, knowing that she could not face them and say what
she intended to say. �Mr. Malfoy, I don�t know why you came back, and I don�t
want to know. I don�t want to know anything about you. I would hate you, but I
can�t give you that amount of power over me. And Dad�� She dared to glance back
at him. �I have nothing to say to you.�

Alyssa walked away from them.
Somehow, some outside force pulled her to her bedroom. She collapsed on her
bed, utterly drained. The tears freed themselves from the hurt, and she cried
without making a sound. Her pain didn�t lessen; she hadn�t expected it to.

Mr. Malfoy ran, and my father
lied.

She grasped the pillow tightly. She was numbed by
shock, but soon that good medicine would be gone. And all she would have left
was the dark hurt.

Why? her soul demanded to
know.

Was there even an answer?

-----

The sun shone through the window,
and the rays of light fell on Alyssa�s face. They did not warm her, for the
first thing she thought of was the previous night. She did not want to get up:
she knew that if she did, she�d see her father, and she wasn�t ready to face
him. She almost wished that she could cry, but the tears weren�t there. She
felt so empty�and so full, all at the same time. She did not really know what
she felt, and she was too lost to try to understand.

Alyssa knew that she couldn�t stay
in bed forever. Eventually, her father would come up. She could hear him down
in the kitchen. She couldn�t avoid him. That simple realization filled her with
anger. Why should he have that power? What gave him the right to be a constant
in her life? She didn�t even really know him. He had so easily lied for so many
years. The father she knew couldn�t have done that. He wouldn�t have.

So Alyssa didn�t really know Harry
Potter. She was so confused. She didn�t want to think anymore. She wrapped the
pillow around her head, willing her thoughts to stop, stop�

There was a knock at her door.
Alyssa knew it was her father. �Leave me alone.� Her voice was low enough that
only she heard it. She had no strength, though, and therefore had nothing to
empower her words.

�Alyssa?�

His voice gave strength to her
convictions, and she yelled, �Go away!�

�You can�t stay in there forever,
Alyssa.�

Alyssa stayed silent.

�Alyssa, please.�

She threw aside her pillow and let
anger carry her to the door. When she opened it, all her cruel words faded; the
anger became mute. The sight of him brought the lost tears to her eyes. They
were uncontrollable as they flowed down her face. Suddenly, she was on the
ground, her back against her closed door.

He was still out there; she could
sense him there. �I�m sorry,� he said.

�That you lied?�

�That you found out.� And he was
gone.

The minutes blurred, and as reality
lost its meaning, Alyssa viewed herself from afar. All her movements were
automatic; though she was awake, her consciousness had retreated to her bed.

She felt that Harry was always
watching her. While she was in the kitchen, eating food that had no taste, he
was watching her. While she moved listlessly through the house, he watched her.
But he only saw an empty shell, so she did not mind.

She would have continued as that
empty shell, if she hadn�t seen Abby heading for the door. Quickly, she put
herself between her friend and the front door.

�Where are you going?� Alyssa
asked.

Abby�s eyes were both desperate and
determined, and those qualities were heard in her voice. �Alyssa, please move,�
she said.

Alyssa stood firm. �You have
nowhere to go, Abby.�

�I can�t stay here. I don�t belong
here.� She glanced back, and her pose betrayed her fearfulness.

�Are you afraid of my father?�

�I�m afraid of my past,� Abby said.
�I�m afraid of everyone knowing it. They�ll know! They�ll know all about me. I
can�t survive that, Alyssa.�

�Abby, you don�t know how much I
need you right now. I don�t understand anything, and everyone else has lied, I
know they have.� Alyssa felt short of breath, and she paused to take in deep
gulps of air. �Stay with me, please. Please, I need you.�

Abby�s determination faded away.
�What�s wrong? What happened?�

The doorbell rang before Alyssa
could speak. She turned around slowly and opened the door with dread in her
every movement.

�Alyssa!� Hermione threw her arms
around the blonde girl, pouring all her relief into the hug.

Alyssa stiffened. Hermione and Ron
were both there. She knew, somehow, that they knew. How could they not? She
wordlessly accepted Ron�s embrace and allowed them in, even though she didn�t
want to. She stood with her head bowed, seeking to feel empty again. Hermione
was speaking at great length about how worried she�d been. At some point, she
noticed that Alyssa was unresponsive. She stopped, her eyes sad.

�What did they do to you?� Hermione whispered,
lightly touching Alyssa�s face. Alyssa jerked away.

�This is what dad did to me.� She
knew he was behind her. She fancied she could feel his pain under her own.

�What?�

�You knew,� Alyssa bitterly said.
�You knew all along, didn�t you? You knew about Mr. Malfoy. And you too, Ron.�

Hermione�s eyes connected with
Harry�s, but she spoke to Alyssa. �How did you��

�Get out,� Alyssa cut in. �Go away;
I don�t want you near me.�

�Stop. I�m the one who lied,� her
father said from behind her. �Don�t say those things to them when you mean to
say them to me.�

Alyssa�s gaze remained on the
floor. The room was still. They were waiting for her to do something. She
reached her hand out to Abby. Abby took a step back, but Alyssa persisted. Finally,
Abby let her touch her. Alyssa leaned heavily on her, then moved toward the
stairs.

Hermione spoke without meaning to.
�Alyssa, you�� Her words stopped themselves; her voice had no place here.

No other words were spoken as
Alyssa and Abby ascended the stairs, entered the guest room, and shut the door.

-----

Hermione held her tongue as she sat
with Ron and Harry in the kitchen.

�I know what you two are thinking,�
Harry said.

�After all these years, that�s not
surprising,� Ron said. His comment didn�t lighten the mood.

�You think I should have told her,�
Harry went on.

�Well,� Hermione began weakly, �she
is young. I mean, you were right not to tell her.�

�No, you think I should have told
her.�

Hermione stirred her tea. �Maybe.
But I�m not her mother. I�m not raising her.�

The relief showed on his face.
�Thank you, Hermione.�

�So now she knows,� Ron said. �What
are you going to do? She�s taking it pretty hard.�

Harry shook his head. �She�s taking
it just the way she needs to. I don�t think there�s much I can do at this
point.� He looked away. �It shouldn�t have happened now. Not after the Eximo.
She�s just a little girl. How can she take all this?�

�She�s your little girl, Harry,�
Hermione reminded him. �Once she accepts the truth, she�ll turn back to you.
She�ll be all right.�

�I tried so hard to protect her.�

�There�s nothing more you could
have done,� Hermione insistently said.

He sighed. �Maybe.�

Hermione took a short sip of her
tea. Though the mood weighed heavily on her, she felt comfortable with the
silence.

�Who is that girl?� Ron asked.

�A very complicated issue,� Harry
replied. �Her name�s Abby Smith. She was in the Eximo.�

Hermione nearly choked on her tea.
�She was in the Eximo? What is she doing in your house?�

�Alyssa won�t let her leave,� Harry
said. �I had Meg check up on her. She is the daughter of the Smiths. She
disappeared when she was four. She was presumed dead, but it turns out that
she�s been with the Eximo the entire time.�

�Lysistrata raised a child?� Ron
said.

�Yeah. Alyssa says that Abby tried
to help her. I don�t know what to do. Her whole family is dead�mostly unsolved
homicides�and if I just throw her out, the Ministry will snatch her up. They�ll
imprison her and probe her, and I don�t think I can do that to her,� Harry said.
�Then again, I can�t keep her here. She worked for the Eximo, for God�s sake.�

�You have to hand her over to the
Ministry, Harry,� Ron said. �You don�t know what information she has.�

�The Ministry will probably show up
here anyways,� Hermione added. �It�s chaos there. No one can believe that the
Eximo was hiding out all along, but we�ve got a lot of dead bodies and a huge
amount of evidence.�

�You wouldn�t believe what they
found in that church,� Ron said. �Sophronia�s books, soul stones, every kind of
weapon imaginable� and they found Mordecai. He�s dead.�

�I thought as much,� Harry said.

�When they find out there�s a living member of the
Eximo, you won�t be able to hold them back,� Hermione told him.

Harry understood all that she was
saying was true. But the truth was a fickle tool. �I can�t do it. I don�t
understand why, but right now, Abby Smith is the only one keeping Alyssa
together. I just can�t.�

Hermione watched him. �I don�t
understand, but this isn�t my battle. It�s yours. But if you need us, you know
we�re there. Right?�

�Of course.�

�Harry, I have only one more
question,� Hermione said. �Is Draco gone?�

�Yes, he is.�

Hermione did not trust that answer.
�He�s gone forever?�

��Mione, Draco�s left me forever so
many times that I�ve forgotten the meaning of forever,� Harry replied.

Hermione placed her hand on his,
speaking softly: �You know that if you want him to be gone, he�s gone.�

�Yeah,� Harry quietly said. �That�s
the catch.�

Ron started to voice his disbelief,
but Hermione threw him a warning glare. �Don�t make me worry about you, Harry,�
she said.

He smiled slightly at her. �I don�t
need to make that effort. You do fine on your own.�

�Ah, that may be true.� She hugged
him, wishing that everything could be all right for him. �Take care of
yourself, Harry, and take care of her.�

�I will.�
- 7
- 8
- 9
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Frozen Love