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And They Didn\'t Live Happily Ever After	By : ElizabethStump Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 90306 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 80
- 81
- 82
“And They Didn't Live Happily Ever After”

Chapter Eighty:
“Missing Her, Missing Him, and a Narrow Miss”

Disclaimer: I'm a little fanfic, long and rambling,
Here is my plot, broad and ambling.
When lawyers get all steamed up,
Hear me blast:
Rowling owns it all
Don't sue my ass

WARNING: Minor character death and description of a murder scene (one paragraph) towards end of this chapter. I can't send all of you comfort food, but I can at least offer a recipe for a comfort food favorite. Don't forget to scroll to the author's notes at the end for a new recipe.

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Severus mostly enjoyed himself that first Friday for drinks with the Finaus and the Malfoys. Most everyone drank their alcohol laced with various fruit juices, flavored liqueurs, and crushed ice, except him. Eventually he was convinced to try a Muggle drink called an “Old Fashioned” which used Bourbon whiskey, bitters, a pinch of sugar, a splash of water, a maraschino cherry, and a slice of orange over ice. Though he preferred his spirits straight, Severus did find this rather refreshing in the tropical climate. While gin and tonic would have been a British gentleman's drink in hot climates, even in the wizarding world, he still was not too keen on gin after the bender he went on the night of Hermione's anniversary dinner. For good reason, that spirit had not quite appealed the same to him since.

The following week found Severus joining his friends for a drink after he closed up shop on Friday. He made sure to go to the bar on a full stomach. As diverse as the dining scene in London was, this small island contained a number of new cuisines he hadn't been exposed to back in wizarding England. A Korean restaurant that Severus had taken a liking to was open a few days a week. They had a very good tofu soup they served with black rice that was more purple than black. It had a nice nutty flavor to it he liked. And besides, the banchan – or side dishes – were worth the trip to the restaurant alone. They served kimchi so spicy that it could clear out even Severus' prodigious sinuses, as well as fishcake, glass noodles, steamed broccoli, pickled daikon radish and lotus root, turnips in chili sauce, chilled steamed bean sprouts with sesame oil, and seaweed with sweet vinegar and salt. Severus was also able to practice his paltry Korean with the waitress in an effort to improve his vocabulary, which expanded with each trip to the restaurant, though it usually involved learning new food names.

Severus entered the bar to find Arnold leaning against the piano, already belting out an Elvis tune accompanied by a pianist who was banging away on the piano keys. Maurice, a Cajun wizard who had fled for sanctuary back in the sixties – after getting himself involved with some Muggle war protest groups and using his magic in some “anti-establishmentarianism ways” – played the accordion. A witch who was clearly old enough to be Severus' grandmother was strumming away on a guitar.

After ordering an Old Fashioned from Bongo, Severus joined the Finaus and the Malfoys, who were already half-way through their first round of drinks.

“Severus!” Mounga called out, spotting his friend. The big man clapped Severus on the back.

“So is every Friday date night?” Severus asked.

“Yep. Gotta keep the passion alive, can't let the drudgery of day-to-day let me forget why I fell in love with Rainbow,” Mounga said, grabbing his wife around the waist and jostling her with a hug and a pat on the hip.

“So what, just drinks out?” Severus asked, wondering if this was all there was to their weekly “date night” night out.

“Oh, no!” Rainbow refuted. Leaning in, she said in a conspiratory whisper, “Sometimes we go out for a movie or theater show amongst the Muggles, but we go to a little hot spring after drinks most times. Moonlight, a waterfall, secluded. We share it with a few other friends. We've decided to let Draco and Ginny have Monday nights, and they just started going to it.”

“I didn't know there were any hot springs on this island, since I haven't come across any in my explorations,” Severus admitted. This revelation made him realize why Draco had looked exceptionally relaxed on Tuesday mornings during the past few weeks.

Mounga leaned in and quietly said, “That's because they are mostly held under the Fidelius Charm, passed down through families. People don't necessarily want to have their little spots overrun with others crowding them and ruining secluded romantic spots. Plus if word got out to the tourists... Usually folk share with a small circle of friends and arrange to have certain nights. Since the hot spring was handed down to me from my father, and I'm the Secret Keeper, I get first pick. Wednesdays are available if you want some place to soak one night a week.”

Severus nodded his head that he was definitely interested.

“Fine, you can follow Rainbow and me after drinks. We'll show you where it is, and you can start visiting it Wednesday nights.”

The night was spent chatting about various things. Mounga had a legal conference he needed to go to at the end of the month in Nevada, in a wizarding town in the middle of nowhere. It was an area often associated with space aliens. Setting up a wizarding village where the Muggle military helps keep nosy people away was definitely one way to keep Muggles from discovering your magical town and community. Then there was the Finau family trip in the summer to Germany to visit the village where one of Rainbow's great-grandmothers came from, plus do a little genealogical research.

Severus gave Rainbow and Mounga an update on their son's progress with Potions tutoring, and put forth the idea to Mounga about a standardized curriculum to guide parents to follow so that their children would be better prepared for their SAT's. Draco chimed in with his own observations on the irregularity of knowledge from child to child, even of the same age. Severus could tell Mounga was seriously considering his idea, since he got that very thoughtful look on his face as he silently nodded.

The Potions master had gone to court once so far in his time on the island, having to testify that a particular witch had been in his office seeking a private consultation. She was being accused of a small crime, but Severus was her alibi at the time of the crime. Severus had his appointment book and ledger as evidence to her whereabouts, and the witch was not in possession of a Time-Turner. Mounga had listened to the case and had the same serious look on his face, and nodded his head in the same manner, as he weighed the evidence and considered the testimony. In the end, the witch was found innocent.

“That is something worth serious consideration,” Mounga replied, which gave Severus hope it might come up at the next town council meeting.

Arnold was back up by the piano again, crooning yet another Elvis song. Granted, Elvis Presley was a Muggle savant, and known by many in the wizarding community, but even Severus was perplexed by Arnold's fascination with the singer.

“Does Arnold always sing Elvis songs?” Severus asked, gesturing to the older, balding Potions master with the slight paunch.

“Oh, Arnold never told you?” Rainbow asked, her eyes changing color from dark blue to bright golden with mischief.

“Told me what?” Severus asked cautiously. He wasn't sure he wanted to know if Arnold had not told him himself. He respected other people's private matters, a polar opposite compared to Rainbow, who was always eager to share everything she knew about everyone.

“He never told you why he sought sanctuary?” she prodded.

“No, and should he choose to divulge that to me, I will let him be the one to tell it,” Severus said shortly.

Rainbow's head jerked back in shock. Mounga hid a smile behind his hand, having rarely seen anyone shut his wife down when it came to opening her mouth.

“Well, I-I just...” she began to stammer.

Draco and Ginny could feel the tension mounting, and Mounga looked like he wasn't going to do a thing to step in. Draco knew Severus' temper and was familiar with his verbal lashings first-hand. He didn't think Rainbow had the fortitude to deal with a full-frontal verbal assault from Severus, should he feel provoked. And given the glint in Severus' eye, he could tell that his mentor was getting fed up with this witch's mouth that tended to run off a bit too much for discretion.

It would not be good for anyone should these two square off against one another. Draco knew he needed to diffuse the situation, and fast.

“Akela's Charms and Transfiguration work is coming along nicely. I think she will receive exceptionally good marks when she takes her SAT's eventually,” Draco remarked, noticing that the subject of Akela brought Rainbow's attention away from the near-confrontation as her gaze shifted to the young wizard and back to her family. “She hadn't told me what she is interested in studying. Has she expressed what subject she would like to pursue for an apprenticeship?”

Rainbow dramatically placed her elbow on the bar and plopped cheek into her hand. Her eyes opened wide with sarcastic flare and said, over-enunciating while giving Severus a meaningful look, “Potions.”

Severus could have sworn Rainbow's eyes changed to three different colors just during those two syllables.

Lifting his drink up to his lips, tempted to down it in one go, he muttered, “It's probably just a phase.”

“Let's hope so,” Rainbow bit back.

Arnold and Ranjit had never taken any apprentices over the decades. In addition, it was common knowledge about how many single Potions masters wound up bedding and usually marrying their female apprentices. This was something that Severus was somewhat guilty of himself with his work with Hermione, though they had already fallen into the sack before she began her work with him.

Severus had no interest in taking Akela as an apprentice, and even if he did, there was certainly nothing romantic that would ever happen between them. Ever. Besides, Severus didn't think he could stand the idea of a mother-in-law who was nearly ten years younger than him, who couldn't keep her mouth shut. If anything, if Akela was interested in a Potions apprenticeship, he'd see if there was a Potions Mistress back in England who was interested in a female apprentice.

“Why not let Severus tutor her?” Ginny suggested, which garnered looks of shock from Draco, Severus, and Rainbow. “Trust me, anyone who had studied under Severus, who can be a hard taskmaster when it comes to brewing, would certainly lose any interest when faced with his demeanor in the classroom.” Draco smirked at the thought and Rainbow's face began to brighten, seeing the wisdom of Ginny's idea. Severus could only glare daggers at Ginny.

Severus had been exceptionally patient with his new students who patronized his business, and took exception to Ginny's old characterizations of him, though they were rather accurate.

“It's true, Severus,” Ginny insisted, looking him square in the face; he noted she left out any mention of Hermione, since she seemed to be the exception to the rule. “One verbal dressing down by you, and she will definitely not be interested in a Potions apprenticeship.”

Severus looked at Mounga, knowing the larger wizard could read the look on his face.

“Hey, if taking your kid gloves off with her will help Akela get over her infatuation, then fine,” Mounga offered, throwing his hands up in surrender.

Akela's parents didn't want to destroy her crush on Severus, but they felt it a tad inappropriate for a girl so young to be attracted to someone so much older, especially one who was not interested in her that way. Severus thought of her like a niece, especially since Kaimi, Akela's younger sister, had started calling him “Uncle Severus.” The Potions master had been unceremoniously adopted into the Finau family. And given that Mounga knew all of Severus' secrets, as a father, he certainly didn't want his daughter to remain too attached to him as well.

It was still quite the surreal experience for Akela's parents to openly discuss their daughter's infatuation with Severus.

A second round of drinks were ordered.

“So, Severus, are you going to the Singletons' Ball tomorrow night at the community center?” Rainbow asked, slowly nursing her drink, a dragon blood wine spritzer. Since coming to Malu Palekaiko, Severus had shunned all advances of the single witches on the island, and her curiosity was getting the better of her.

“No,” he replied firmly. Severus didn't even bother looking her in the eye, instead choosing to acknowledge the question with no more than a simple one-word response.

“Aw, c'mon, it's for charity,” she cajoled him. “A single wizard like you, half the single witches in this town chasing after you, you'd fetch a handsome price.”

Severus glanced at Mounga, who gave him that fleeting look he had on his face when the larger wizard would otherwise say, “I can't say anything, dude.”

Draco, Ginny and Severus had heard about the charity event in which the unattached witches and wizards, who were at least age of consent, got together on Valentine's Day for a ball. Some – from both sexes – offered themselves up for bidding of a date that night or a future night, in order to help raise money for various causes. At the auction, items were also offered up for bidding, and many items were donations from the community at large.

One of the places the money raised would go for was the cost of maintenance of the community center. Another place was for a fund for sanctuary-seekers who came to the island without any money. Draco, Ginny, and Severus were fortunate to have money, while many who came did not. The monies for the fund were used to house, feed, and clothe sanctuary-seekers and help them get back on their feet. There was also a fund for helping children whose parents could not afford to send them to the mainland for their SAT's, which usually involved staying the night in a nearby wizarding hotel, food, and other travel costs. There was also a widows and orphans charity, and a few others.

Draco had offered some blocks of time for Charms and Transfiguration tutoring, which – considering most of the single witches and wizards attending had no children – would most probably fetch a small price, or someone might bid on it for their niece or nephew.

The Potions master had not offered his time, but elixirs. All of them tended to be more advanced potions that required a great deal of time and expensive ingredients, including a few vials of the ones that were being sold at The Sirens' Secrets. It was Valentine's Day, and those types of potions might fetch a good price at the auction that night, especially by a wizard who thought he was definitely going to get lucky. Severus thought many of the charities were worthy causes, which is why he bothered to donate the potions in the first place. Had it not been for Draco having Galleons in other Gringotts banks around the world, Severus himself would have been in need of the Sanctuary-Seekers' Charity Fund.

Severus glanced at Draco, gauging just how uncomfortable he was with the subject of people offering themselves up for money, and noticed the younger wizard's jaw clench a little. The two Slytherins had closed that chapter of their lives permanently. Ginny was also looking mildly irritated at the subject, but was trying to not let her face give anything away.

“Madam,” Severus drawled coolly, “I find the idea of someone having their flesh peddled repugnant.”

Surprisingly, Mounga kept his face impassive in response to Severus' comment.

Rainbow scoffed, tossing her hand forward dismissively as if batting away his objections. “Pfft! It's not like we're running a prostitution ring. I didn't take you for a prude, Severus.”

Before Severus could reply and address Rainbow's dismissive attitude, Draco spoke up.

With restrained anger, Draco replied, “After the war, a former classmate of mine was 'disenfranchised,' and forced into prostitution. She was later found to be murdered in a most gruesome fashion, a murder that would not have happened had she not been driven into such a profession. This is not a subject Severus or I take lightly, Rainbow.”

Rainbow's eyes went wide with shock. “I had no idea,” she gasped.

“And your discretion on this matter is strongly suggested,” Severus added, glaring at Rainbow in full Death Eater-mode.

Severus could have sworn he saw Rainbow quail a little bit, getting a glimpse at how dangerous and formidable he could be if push came to shove.

The subject was dropped, and Rainbow's curiosity to ask why Severus wasn't dating any witches was tempered for the moment. Given how they had clashed twice in one night, the group silently decided to stick to less inflammatory subjects.

The tension finally began to ebb away between Rainbow, Draco, and Severus as they finished up their second round of drinks. It did not escape Severus' attentions that Mounga did not defend his wife when Severus called her out on her penchant for gossiping earlier in the evening. The larger wizard even looked bemused.

Draco and Ginny eventually excused themselves and wandered off into the night for a stroll before heading home. The Finaus and Severus walked to the edge of town before Mounga Side-along Apparated with Severus to the hidden hot springs while Rainbow Apparated by herself.

Looking about, it was pitch black. The stars were their only illumination since the last quarter-moon had not yet risen. They used wand-light to make their way up the embankment with lava stones set as a stairway into the hillside.

Mounga cast about some glowing orbs to float above the water to illuminate the area, and Severus saw the light reflected in the gentle ripples of the water. The softly-glowing light revealed the jungle that sheltered this area, enrobing it in a verdant tangled wall of wild vines and vegetation. Only from the middle of the hot spring, which was more of a hot pool, could you see the sky above.

The ripples were caused by a waterfall that spilled into the pool, cooling the magma-heated water to a wonderful 100 degrees F – up to a simmering 105 degrees F, depending on what part of the pool you soaked in. Severus was amazed that someplace so ideally perfect existed, looking as if this place was designed on purpose for lovers. It was truly romantic.

“This is amazing,” Severus said. “Wednesday, can I come here during the day to see what it looks like in the light?”

“Sure, all day Wednesday, starting from sunrise, until Thursday, just before dawn. There are a few of us who like a morning soak, just in case you arrive a little early or leave a bit late,” Mounga warned him.

Looking back across the slope of the volcano that gradually descended down to the seashore some distance away, Severus looked at the stars and gauged that he was somewhere along the north-eastern side of the island. Off in the distance, straight ahead was the Big Island, a few faint lights in the far distance indicating where the Muggles lived, unaware of this place.

Severus bent down and stuck his hand in the water, feeling the warmth. It was a perfect temperature. He made a mental note to tell Draco not to book any after-hours clients on Wednesday.

He thanked Mounga and Rainbow for their offer to enjoy this private spot before Apparating back to the hotel, so the Finaus could begin enjoying the rest of their date night alone.

Back in his hotel room awaited the photograph of Hermione.

“You should have seen it,” he said, imagining the conversation he would have had with her, had she been there. “Waterfall, lush foliage ensuring privacy, a Fidelius Charm to keep others from bothering us, perfect temperature, it was just as beautiful as those photos in those Muggle tourism books.”

Undressed and lying on his bed, the proper charms in place to avoid being overheard, Severus began stroking himself, thinking of Hermione's nude body standing in the pool near the edge. He could envision her skin glistening with beads of water catching and refracting the moonlight, a single white plumeria flower in her hair, placed on the left side signaling that she was a taken witch: his witch.

He sighed her name as he came, fantasizing about making love to her in the jungle at night. He wished she could be there with him to celebrate Valentine's Day tomorrow. As it was, his memory of her would be the only thing to fill his aching heart.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hermione awoke to find herself surrounded by a pile of books on Hawaii. She had gone to the bookstore on Friday night and bought the large stack of books, then promptly fell asleep while reading them. Some of them were travel guides, others were on the culture of Hawaiian and Polynesian islands, and a few were “coffee table” books featuring beautiful photographs of some of the most breathtakingly gorgeous places in the Hawaiian Islands.

Lava tubes, lush tropical jungles, beaches with swaying palm trees, moonscape fields of recently-erupted lava cooled to a shiny and wrinkled black, papaya and coffee farms with rows of trees, jaw-droppingly beautiful waterfalls that poured into a series of pools with Muggles diving head-first into the cool looking waters, dry grassy lands surrounding a lava stone church built in the 1800's, and dark and seemingly impenetrable forests of bamboo. All these scenes and more filled the pages of the books she'd bought.

Gazing at one particularly tranquil photograph of a cascading waterfall and pool, edged with bright tropical flowers, Hermione imagined herself and Severus skinny-dipping there.

Reaching her hand down between her legs, she began to think of Severus, pressing her up against the side of the pool near the waterfall, the rush of water drowning out her cries as he filled her. Blindly reaching to her bedside table, Hermione grabbed a bottle of lube and a dildo the twins had given her months ago. After lubing it up, she inserted it into herself and set the charm to slide in and out of her. Her eyes shut tight, she could almost see the vivid colors surrounding her, the call of wild birds in the nearby forest, the scent of strange and exotic flowers in the air.

She sighed longingly, “I need you, Severus. God, how I've missed you.”

Stroking her clit, she tried to remember the sensation of his body between her thighs, the feeling of his skin moving against hers, his weight bearing down atop her as he moved into her.

Hermione came, but it was not quite as satisfying as she had hoped.

“Happy Valentine's Day, Severus,” she whispered to the pillow next to her.

Feeling more depressed than relaxed from her orgasm, Hermione dressed for the day. She would be working in Albert's garden that morning, followed by an afternoon with Neville at his nursery business.

The one bright thing to her depressing day ahead was that instead of sitting alone at home on Valentine's Day, she would be joining Albert for a monthly gathering with other Potions masters. A bit of intellectual stimulation with fellow academics was just what she needed to keep her mind off of Severus for the night.

Marf served Hermione up a hearty breakfast, since Saturdays were particularly laborious for his Mistress.

As she nibbled on her toast absentmindedly, she continued reading “Antigone” by Sophocles, mumbling the words aloud, her pronunciation hindered by her breakfast. Hermione got in a couple good hours of studying before heading off to Albert's. It seemed that for most Potions apprentices, working on a Potions master's garden was a daily chore, but with Hermione's arrangement of working for Lavender as well, Albert kept her duties down to one day a week. The weekly half-day apprenticeship with Neville would more than make up for her lack of practical Herbology experience in his own garden, as it would expose her to a greater variety of plants than what he grew solely in his garden.

Besides, Albert liked puttering around in his garden after work as a way to unwind and feel connected to his late wife, since it was a chore they had shared together during their many years of marriage.

Her gardening chores for the week involved adding more mulch for the spring, but not before raking and aerating the winter mulch that had compacted over the season from snow and being trod upon. Hermione could tell that her back was going to really enjoy a hot soak in the tub tonight, since many of these chores could not be done with a wand. Wizards used wheelbarrows, as using one's wand to move mulch was a somewhat messy process, usually resulting in lots of particles being airborne and making one cough. Shovels and rakes were the way one moved and hauled mulch, even in the wizarding world. Hermione understood how Neville suddenly got his broad shoulders.

'So much for magic making things easier,' Hermione groused silently to herself, wishing there was a charm with which to do some gardening chores.

Once the mulching for Albert was done, it was time for her to go over to Neville's nursery.

Apparating near the gates of Longbottom Horticulture & Herbology Ltd., she found Neville digging up fruit trees, bare-rooting them before heeling them in a soft berm of soil. He was digging up the trees in expectation of those who would be planting fruit trees soon, since it was the beginning of the season for that garden task.

He handed her a shovel and showed her how far away from the trunk to use the spade to cut the roots. He used a garden fork to gently lift and rock them from the soil, before taking them over to the berm of soil to heel them in for easy selection. There were a few customers throughout the day's work who snatched up trees she had bare-rooted not moments before. In each section for each variety of tree was a photograph showing the tree blooming and fruiting, like Muggle time-lapse photography. Hermione barely had time to attach little tags to each tree showing the genus, species, and variety before some customers took them over to the cashier for purchase.

“So how's your Greek coming along?” Neville asked as he brought the blade of his spade down sharply to cut a root.

“Not bad, though I feel I should be progressing faster than I am,” Hermione admitted. She periodically grunted as she gently lifted an apple tree from the ground, rocking the garden fork up and down.

“What are you doing tonight?”

“Albert's taking me with him to some monthly social with other Potions masters tonight,” Hermione replied.

“Oh.” Neville sounded a little crestfallen, and Hermione suddenly wondered if he was asking her out on a date.

“But I guess I'm free next Saturday,” she added, feeling a bit awkward.

“Oh, great,” he replied more cheerfully. “Because I thought what better way to improve your Greek than hanging out with some. There is a Greek restaurant and bar I used to go to when I was trying to improve my Greek. I thought I might take you there to help with yours.”

Hermione suddenly felt a little silly, thinking he was going to ask her out on a date. She was recently divorced, and Neville was probably still pining for Luna. It was nothing more than an offer to help her with her language skills.

Finally done with her Saturday gardening and Herbology chores, Hermione dragged her tired arse back to her flat. Now she had to take a shower and make herself presentable for the social function. Fortunately, Marf had a nice, hot meal waiting for her.

Albert had told Hermione to dress lady-like, but on the conservative side. Many of Albert's colleagues were older like him, and they had certain notions regarding witches wearing trousers. And given that some of these Potions masters were still bachelors, she needed to dress as non-provocatively as possible, especially since she was recently divorced and Albert was recently widowed. Anything else would set tongues wagging in their circle, even if Albert was old enough to be Hermione's great-grandfather, and that he was still mourning his wife.

Arriving at Albert's home, he complimented her on her choice of outfit, indicating it made her look quite respectable. She wore a simple black skirt that went to just above her ankles, a pair of sensible boots that were freshly polished by Marf, a high-necked emerald green blouse, and a long black cloak.

They Floo'ed over to the home of Niles Goggin, a fellow Potions master who was about a decade Albert's junior. Niles greeted Hermione warmly and offered to get her a drink, to which Albert said he would fetch one for her.

Albert had warned his apprentice that because she was a single – well, actually a divorced witch – that she shouldn't accept any drinks from anyone unless she poured them herself or Albert had. Potions masters evidently liked to add a little something extra to the drinks of single witches who came to these affairs, but usually it was to play tricks on one another. Hermione didn't want to suddenly have an extra pair of hands sprout out of her ears nor an aphrodisiac slipped in on the sly, and she took Albert's warning seriously.

Hermione kept a couple bezoars in her skirt pocket just in case.

Most everyone else was there, including Reginald Chuff. Introductions were made and Hermione made sure not to grimace when introduced to the old Potions master that Severus had apprenticed under, especially after hearing some of the things Chuff had made Severus do and suffer.

Sipping her gin and tonic, Hermione mostly listened to the old masters ramble on, picking up little tricks and tips they casually mentioned about brewing some new potions, or recalling one they had concocted many years ago.

“So Hermione, how would you judge Albert as a master so far?” Royston Bentwick, a Potions master about ten years older than her, asked. He was the baby of the bunch, since most of the other Potions masters were sixty years or older.

“So far, I'd say that Albert has been an excellent master to apprentice under. He's been very helpful and supportive,” Hermione replied truthfully.

For some reason, the other Potions masters found this funny and started laughing, as if she had said something uproariously hilarious.

“Albert,” Royston gasped, “didn't you tell her what happened to your first apprentice?”

Albert swirled his drink and raised his eyebrows, indicting he wasn't about to volunteer such matters and would remain tight-lipped.

Royston had only heard about the tale, but Niles decided he would fill Hermione in on the details. Albert should have known that they would drag this little story up, though every Potions master there had his own tale to tell regarding some rather embarrassing moment.

“So, Albert here,” whimpered Niles, in between subsiding laughs, “was teaching his apprentice... Brendon–”

“Brandon,” Albert corrected him, as he gave Niles a look telling him his own little story was next on the block for recollection.

“Brandon, who was a very handsome young wizard and engaged to a lovely witch, Agatha, I think was her name...” Albert nodded that Niles recalled correctly. “Anyway, Albert was teaching Brandon about love potions. Some birds, I think it was pigeons...”

“Crows,” Albert amended.

“Right, crows, land on the skylight above his workbench area and start pecking at something on the roof. Well, some debris was jostled loose from ceiling and fell into the cauldron of the love potion, which exploded in spectacular fashion all over the lab. Most notably, all over Albert and Brandon. Now, you must know that Albert had only been a Potions master for about five years. Brandon was his first apprentice and was only about eight years his junior at the time. So the love potion goes everywhere. Dangerose and Agatha go to visit them in the lab to call them for lunch, and find Albert and Brandon in a deep lip-lock.”

Hermione's face fell, finding this story rather embarrassing and feeling pity for Albert at having the mortifying experience dragged up in front of others, especially to her. There was nothing funny about the accident, which could have happened to anyone. Hermione's finding no humor about the story did not stop the rest of the wizards there from busting up laughing. A few spilled their drinks in the process, even though they had heard the story numerous times over the years.

“Agatha almost called off the wedding, and Albert had to convince Dangerose that he didn't secretly play both sides of the pitch.” Niles brayed like a donkey in between his howls.

Hermione remembered how she thought Ron was bisexual for a time. The anger and feeling of betrayal were still quite fresh in her mind, and she was sorely tempted to throw her drink in Niles' face, but refrained, refusing to join in on the laughter. Albert wasn't laughing either.

“Awww, c'mon, you gotta admit that's funny!” Royston ribbed her.

“Thinking your husband is playing around on the side with someone behind your back? No, I don't see the humor of that,” Hermione said flatly. She felt empathy for Dangerose for the anguish she went through until the matter was cleared up.

Suddenly everyone remembered that Hermione's husband had recently left her for a witch he'd been seeing behind her back for years. The laughter quickly died from their lips upon realizing their faux pas.

Given how embarrassing that was, even though it was many years ago, and how Albert's last apprentice was slothful, Hermione could see why he had been reluctant to take on a new apprentice.

“Well, Hermione, at least I hope you aren't a sour pain in the ass as one of my apprentices was,” Reginald Chuff threw in, trying to break the tension.

Even without giving a name, Hermione had a strong suspicion as to who this “sour pain in the ass” was before he continued rambling on.

“You'd think someone who was in an arranged marriage with a guaranteed piece of arse to bed every night would have been happy, but no. And then his wife up and died on him, and he was even worse to deal with. I was just glad that he was a quick learner and had already finished learning his five languages so I could accredit him and cut him loose shortly after the funeral,” Chuff grumbled.

Reginald was trying to lighten the mood, but failing miserably. Hermione could now see first-hand why Severus referred to him as a bastard.

Royston decided to offer up his own embarrassing Potions failure to change the mood, making Hermione eventually laugh when he went into great detail about how he accidentally got a cementing-type potion on his hands and wound up getting stuck to everything he came in contact with, including a large cast iron cauldron. He eventually fell over and got covered in various Potions ingredients that made rashes and boils pop up all over his body.

“Hermione,” Niles called out to grab her attention. “Tell me how you managed to wrangle an apprenticeship with Albert here, given his aversion to taking one on.”

Shaking her head, she tried to deflect from the question, which seemed to make the other wizards there even more curious. “Well,” she deferred, glancing at her master, “Albert can tell it far better than I can.”

Albert gave a rather brief description about the circumstances regarding Dangerose's will and Trevor Spawn. Sebastian Delgado was mentioned, to which several wizards snorted amusedly. There was the “encouragement” by Delgado to take her on as an apprenticeship, though Albert didn't say it was a mandatory condition of the clause for Lavender Brown to take him on as her new Potions master, it was subtly picked up.

“And just what did you do for Delgado that made him blackmail Albert into taking you on as his apprentice?” Jack Braxton, a short, fat wizard who had a bulbous nose, asked rather bluntly.

“Saved his arse on a Potions problem when conventional methods of thinking would not make it financially feasible to manufacture large batches of the Sequoia Potion,” Hermione threw out, challenging any other insinuations to the contrary.

“Oh, you came up with the brewer's kettles idea? That was brilliant!” Niles gushed with admiration.

Severus did owl a few other Potions masters, but no one had a solution to fit Severus' needs for Miss Brown.

“Thanks to the Muggle Alliance Network, it was an easy solution,” she admitted, trying to be humble, but feeling a great deal of pride in her idea.

Royston quirked an amused brow. “So, Hermione...” He paused momentarily, his mouth twitching with a smile at one corner, before asking, “Did you help Delgado with that Sequoia Potion personally?” His eyebrows were climbing higher and higher up his forehead the longer it took for Hermione to answer his question.

She didn't like the tone of his question, though that's exactly what she did with Severus. All
eight various brew times, plus the use of the Sequoia Potion with each variation of the Arousal Potion, Irresistible. There was a whole lot of testing going on in Severus' bed and around his flat for some months.

“Hermione only corresponded with Delgado and didn't have a chance to meet him in person until the Ministry's Halloween Ball,” Albert informed the fellow wizards, saving Hermione from having to answer that herself.

Royston was definitely interested in Hermione, especially since she was the only witch there and close to his age. He was currently in between girlfriends and found the idea of a female Potions apprentice a rather alluring prospect.

“Wait!” Niles noted with surprise. “Were you that witch Delgado was apologizing to at the ball? Did you dye your hair black? The one in the little royal blue number?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” Hermione bit out.

Royston let out a wolf whistle. “No wonder Delgado made a fool of himself over you. Just what did he do to get on your bad side?” the youngest Potions master of the group asked.

“It was a cultural misunderstanding,” Hermione said, trying not to sound too irritated. She was getting tired abut people bringing up that incident at the ball.

“Probably thinking his lips could better translate that thick accent if they were on yours!” Braxton shouted out.

Hermione folded her arms and crossed her legs.

The group of six wizards, minus Albert, all made “ooh” noises, knowing Braxton had hit the mark.

“He's lucky I only slapped him and didn't use that curse involving turning a wizard's bollocks into cannonball-sized lead weights,” she tossed out as a warning.

There was a collective gasp and groans of sympathetic pain as several wizards crossed their own legs. Albert sat there smugly, glad Hermione could hold her own against this crowd.

The challenge portion of the evening came around. Each Potions master presented a task, and the one who performed the worst had to down a shot of whatever libation they were pouring that night. Anyone who could not complete the task had to drink every shot from those who didn't perform the worst.

Hermione began to understand how Severus had such a huge alcohol tolerance, given that one time she had found him drunk after he'd downed most of the bottle and had polished off the last of it so quickly. These guys were absolute lushes with a hollow leg for liquor.

The first task was to identify a Potions ingredient based on smell alone, hidden in a box. Everyone wrote down their answer on a scrap of paper, and everyone who got it wrong had to take a drink.

Hermione won that round as she was the only one who not only identified the ingredient correctly, but also identified the country of origin and subspecies of the Potions ingredient. Everyone bowed to her in awe of her talent and downed their drinks, since they had only listed the genus and species.

The next task was prompted by Reginald Chuff, involving peeling a particular ingredient. Niles offered the choice between apples from his pantry and knoggelwalden egg-fruits he had just harvested from his greenhouse. Knoggelwalden egg-fruits were bright pink, shaped like a large egg, had a thin shell-like rind, and – should you pierce the inner membrane – would make your hands smell like a dead skunk. This was a timed event, so it was the last to finish who had to drink everyone else's drinks.

Hermione had tested knoggelwalden egg-fruits before, but never had to peel them. When she tested them, she boiled them whole, which neutralized the stench the fresh fruit carried, before she sliced them open for inspection. For some Potions, knoggelwalden egg-fruits were peeled, leaving the inner membrane intact and then gently poaching them, since the shell-like rind could counter or change the properties of some potions.

Chuff chose the egg-fruits over the apples. Hermione wondered if Chuff picked this particular test knowing Hermione would fail. Which she did. Niles had to fetch something to de-scent her hands, now that she smelled like a deceased member of the Mephitidae family. Once her hands no longer reeked, she had to down most of the drinks, except for Royston's because while he didn't pierce the membrane, he didn't finish within the allotted time.

There was a chopping competition, which Hermione didn't win. She didn't lose either, but came somewhere squarely in the middle.

As the evening wore on, Hermione began to lose more challenges and finally bowed out when she thought one more shot would make her regurgitate the entire evening's imbibings. At least whatever she was drinking was not going to make her jump up on the furniture, partially disrobe and sing, “I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts,” though she thought that some of the wizards there wouldn't mind a bit if she did, especially Royston.

Sitting on the couch, holding on to the arm of it to keep from spinning off of it and hitting the wall, Hermione almost didn't notice Royston plop his drunk arse down next to her. In the other room, Niles was singing some maudlin ballad in Russian that was very familiar, but she couldn't quite name it given her drunken state.

“So how about you and me go out for a drink sometime,” Royston asked. He held one hand over one eye so he would only see one Hermione.

“We're already drunking,” Hermione slurred, using the wrong tense in the wrong way.

“Nawwwwww,” Royston said, drawing out his response. “I mean, like a date. Maybe dinner.”

Hermione shook her head. “Nope. No way. Not a chance. Not interested. Nuh-uh.” God, she had to stop shaking her head or she really would lose the entire contents of her stomach soon.

“Aww, you gotta get you-shelf back on the market sometime,” he insisted, slurring a bit himself. “What'cha doin' next Saturday?”

“Going to a geek restaurant – a Greek restaurant with Neville to work on my Greek,” she admitted, but then slowly realized in her drunken state she shouldn't have said as much.

“That boy? Longbottom? He is green as gas – grass. You need a man!” Royston said, puffing out his chest, which was one of those lovely examples of why some witches from other countries made fun of English wizard's physiques. He had one of those shallow, hairless, caved-in chests.

“That boy is a friend an' the same age as me. No, wait, older. I mean, younger,” she warned him, glaring at him with a challenging eye, should he continue to berate her friend.

“What, he got to your bed before, before me?” Royston chuckled dismissively.

Hermione was glad she had drunk as much as she did at that moment, as she nary felt the impact of her fist making contact with Royston's jaw. Had she been sober, it would have hurt like hell.

Royston fell to the floor, laughing, having been knocked off the couch. He was too drunk to fully feel the effects of Hermione's right hook.

The latest game that was being held, involving naming Potions ingredients in reverse alphabetical order, suddenly stopped. Even Niles stopped his crooning.

Albert came over and looked down at Hermione who was looking a bit green.

“What happened?” he asked with wonder.

Pointing an incriminating finger at Royston, who was still on the floor laughing, she defiantly stated, “He accused me of shagging Neville when I turned him down for a date. Turned down Royston for a date. Honor was at stake.”

Albert conjured a bucket and put it to hover right in front of Hermione just in time before the evening's libations all came up. Hermione suddenly remembered how awful it was to vomit alcohol not just out one's mouth, but out through one's nose as well.

The round of challenges was halted while Royston was checked out and found to be all right, though Albert insisted on letting the younger Potions master keep the injury to his jaw as a reminder to mind his manners where Albert's apprentice was concerned. Royston would feel it tomorrow and have a lovely bruise to hopefully jog his memory of what he did.

Niles clapped Hermione on the back, telling her she had done all right for her first time at their monthly booze-up. He said she was welcome to come back to future gatherings, while he handed her an elixir to help with the post drinking-vomit wooziness she was experiencing. Hermione blew her nose, but it still felt like there was some chunks of vomit still clinging to the lining of her sinuses, to her discomfort and disgust.

Royston was not necessarily chastised by the group for his behavior, but it was not condoned either. Hermione and the young Potions master had “worked out their differences” and the group would let it be. They wondered if Royston was drunk enough to not remember the evening and would try propositioning Hermione again at the next meeting.

Niles also tended to Hermione's hand, which was beginning to swell. After checking it, Niles determined that there were no broken bones.

Albert decided it was time for Hermione to go home. Once they had bid the rest of the Potions masters good night, with Hermione giving a begrudging grunt at Royston, Albert Side-along Apparated with his apprentice to the street in front of the Red Ginseng, since he didn't want her to get splinched or slur her address and wind up coming out of the wrong fireplace via Floo.

Arriving at the Red Ginseng, they found the place crawling with Aurors.

“What the...” Hermione began, but was at a loss for words.

“Hermione!” Harry called out and ran over to her. He embraced her and gave out a great sigh of relief. “Where were you?”

“Hermione was with me and several of my colleagues at a social function this evening,” the elder Potions master informed her friend.

Harry suddenly got a whiff of how much “socializing” Hermione had done for the evening. “How much did you drink?”

“Too much,” she admitted guiltily.

Harry then caught the faint scent of vomit on her breath.

Hermione squinted at all the activity going on. “Just what is going on?” she asked. She moved past Harry and made to go to the entrance of her block of flats. She slipped past an Auror who was supposed to stop anyone from entering.

“Hermione!” Harry called out. He tried to stop her, but suddenly found his cloak snagged on an old iron joint in the brickwork in the wall across from the entrance to the building. It hindered him from stopping her in time.

Gazing up at the block of flat's open atrium, Hermione saw the reason why the place was swarming with Aurors. Blaise Zabini was suspended in mid-air. A spell did not hold him in place, but rather his skin had been peeled away from the front of his body and hooks that came out of the wall, placed there magically, grappled the ends of the thin pieces of flesh suspending his body as if floating. His abdominal wall had not been pierced, but it looked like all his major organs had been somehow magically transported outside of his body and laid there in a puddle in the middle of the atrium floor beneath his body, most probably done with an Entrail Expelling Curse.

Hermione turned right around. She stumbled out of the building and onto the grimy damp cobblestones. She thought there was nothing left in her stomach after throwing up at the party, but she was proven wrong. Now on her hands and knees she wretched up the last bit of what was in her stomach, even dry-heaving at the end for good measure. Her body wanted to make sure there was nothing left.

Moody came over and stared down at Hermione. “So, did you know Mr. Zabini?” he asked very matter of factly, seemingly unaware or unconcerned over the physical distress Hermione was in currently.

Albert had crouched next to Hermione to help hold her hair out of the way while she finished retching. “Really? Now? Can't you wait until she's at least not on her knees from the shock of it?” the Potions master chastised the Auror.

Gathering her wits, Hermione made sure to remember that Zabini officially only worked only as a gigolo. Even Albert was told of the unsanctioned marketing and advertising work that Lavender had Zabini do for her. Albert was not sympathetic to Death Eaters, but he was not exactly in agreement with some aspects of the Death Eater decree. The decree treated those who were reluctant Death Eaters, forced into joining, the same as the most zealous of Voldemort's adherents. Albert was willing to play along with his employer's ruse that Zabini was only a gigolo, and why she bothered to employ him if he was a Death Eater.

There were some things Albert understood that he was not entitled to know about. His employer had made mention of Zabini saving her from a fate worse than death, and that was enough for Albert to not pursue the topic.

“He lived in the flat above me,” Hermione truthfully answered.

“And you were all right with the knowledge of a known Death Eater living one floor above you?” asked Moody incredulously.

“We didn't bother each other,” she bit back, challenging his implied accusations. “Besides, the rent is free. You try living on what I'm making as an apprentice and paying for a flat.”

The pay wasn't exactly bad, and it was better than what the Ministry had until recently been paying her, but Moody didn't need to know what her new salary was. Just the statement that she was a paid apprentice made her sound as if she was living in poverty and thereby the statement of free rent sounded justifiable to the Head Auror, despite who her neighbors where.

“Apprentice?” Moody questioned, having temporarily forgotten seeing Hermione there with Albert when he came in to question Miss Brown after Draco and Severus' disappearance.

“Yes,” Albert replied, standing up and going nose-to-nose with the Auror. “Albert Dobmeir, Potions Master, E.T.F.C., and she is my apprentice.”

“Well,” Moody said a bit gruffly. “Where was Mrs. Weasley this evening, if you'll allow me to ask her,” he said a bit sarcastically.

“She was with me and six other Potions masters for a social function. So if you are accusing her of anything, she has a solid alibi.”

Moody blinked and said, “I wasn't accusing her of doing it.”

“Well, that's what it sounded like,” Albert barked at him.

Harry came over to join the conversation. “Hermione, your flat is no place to stay tonight. The Aurors will be here all night. Why don't you come back to my house, and Zhubanysh will make up the spare room,” he offered, placing a protective arm around her. “You can come in and answer questions tomorrow morning when you feel better and sober.”

“My clothes?” Hermione said, thinking of what she'd need.

“Dobby will wash your clothes tonight. We have a few spare unopened toothbrushes, so you can take one. Just don't stay here tonight, Hermione,” her friend insisted.

She nodded.

“Why don't you take tomorrow off,” Albert said, allowing her to take care of matters with the Ministry and the aftermath of the night's events.

Moody gave leave for Harry to take Hermione to his home before he came back to finish helping his fellow Aurors with the crime scene.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Heads up!” Draco called out.

With one hand, Severus caught the package tossed over to him across his office.

'Ooh, Ginny's banana chocolate chip bread.'

“Happy Valentine's Day,” Draco said sincerely, not meaning to prod a delicate spot, but did so inadvertently.

Severus grumbled and opened a drawer to chuck the baked good in it before slamming the drawer shut with his wand, his mood suddenly soured.

The pair of wizards had come to the shop for a few Saturday morning clients. Even with an extra lengthy swim and long wank in the shower, it did not relieve the emotions simmering below the surface of Severus' impassive visage. The day was meant for celebrating love, and here he was with the object of his affection half a world away.

Draco threw himself into the chair on the other side of Severus' desk, setting one foot on the edge of Severus' desk. He scrutinized his mentor's demeanor.

“Why don't you just send her an albatross?” Draco suggested, as it was the most fucking obvious thing in the world.

“Who knows if the Aurors are still watching my... her flat,” Severus reasoned.

“Then send an albatross to her at work,” Draco huffed with slight exasperation. “Lavender has been known to get an albatross now and again. It would not be unusual.”

There was no need to name who Draco was referring to. Even he had noticed that the happiness that Hermione brought Severus in the last few months in England had nearly ebbed away. The blond wizard could certainly empathize. When he was parted from Ginny for nearly a year and a half, he came close to losing his mind. Given how Severus was a man who didn't openly express his emotions, Draco could tell that he felt them quite deeply and viscerally, which meant that despite the Potions master's cool exterior, the man was withering away on the inside.

Severus thought about it. He had owled Hermione a missive once, but it was under the guise of another personality in order to ensure she would return to him. The second time was just a terse note as himself after Hermione's anniversary dinner. But of the sweetly-toned letter, how close was that personality of Calleo to his own? His genteel and courteous persona had to have come from somewhere, or was it just another mask of his? He was finding it harder to remember who he really was, with Hermione not around him any longer.

“I'll think about it,” Severus replied, just before his first morning appointment arrived for some one-on-one tutoring.

Draco nodded, acknowledging Severus' response. He recognized the sense of hesitation and fear of rejection from when he had thought about seeking out Ginny shortly after the Death Eater's Decree came out, even after Molly threatened him.

As Draco's first student came in for some Charms tutoring, he grumbled a little to himself. Tutoring was something he was good at, but he didn't quite enjoy it as much as the work he once did for Lavender. Draco still hadn't decided upon a career, but as the weeks pressed on, he knew he didn't want to spend the rest of his life tutoring. He actually missed doing advertising and marketing for Lavender. At least he found that work to be fun and challenging, not mind-numbingly repetitious and frustrating like his current occupation. Draco was patient, but even he was finding it hard not to call a few of his students dunderheads to their faces when they didn't bother to do the homework he'd assigned. Then they complained they didn't understand the work, even with him practically holding their hand, step-by-step. If some of his students at least attempted to try and do the work, they might understand it.

Suddenly inspired, Draco's attitude improved. He would talk it over with Ginny over their Valentine's Day dinner at Mario's that night. It was so simple that he wouldn't be surprised if Ginny had already considered it herself.

============

A/N: Thank you to my most highly valued and talented betas, Junew and thegreyladies.

Placing events into the timeline of my fic, Severus gave the prophecy to the Dark Lord in early summer of 1980, but then killed Gabrielle shortly after that. So within a few months of getting his apprenticeship, Severus began teaching at Hogwarts in September 1980.

Mephitidae is the Family to which skunks belong to.

Here is the recipe for Ginny's banana chocolate chip bread I was able to get from her:

Ginny's Banana Chocolate Chip Bread

2 cups regular all-purpose flour ("plain flour")
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
13 oz. weight very ripe peeled banana (approx three large bananas, see tip in #4)
1/4 cup oil (safflower or grape seed oil recommended)
1/4 cup buttermilk
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
3 TBL. milk
1 TBL. vanilla
1-1/2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
1. Preheat oven to 350 F
2. Prepare 4 mini-loaf pans (2-cup capacity). Spray each pan with non-stick baking spray, or coat with butter and flour.
3. Into a medium bowl, measure flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Sift or mix until ingredients evenly distributed. Set aside until Step #6 below.
4. In a large bowl place peeled bananas and gently mash with a potato masher or fork. Mash until just softened. Do not over-mash. Tip: For best results, use bananas that are at least 75% brown or black. Using 100% brown or black bananas that have just begun to liquefy in the peel is perfectly fine too. The more overripe, the better.
5. Add oil, buttermilk, sugar, eggs, milk, and vanilla to the mashed bananas. Gently whisk until just barely mixed. Avoid using a power mixer to avoid lengthening starch molecules in bananas. The less you work it, the more crumb-tender it will be.
6. Add in flour mix and whisk until you still have a few small clumps of flour still not mixed in. Remember, less working of the batter means less chewy banana bread.
7. Fold in chocolate chips. Tip: Use 1 cup regular chocolate chips and 1/2 cup mini chips for better suspension of chocolate chips throughout batter. Fold with spatula until no more flour clumps remain and chips are evenly mixed.
8. Pour batter evenly into the four mini-loaf pans.
9. Bake for 20 minutes, then rotate the pans and bake for 20 more minutes.
10. Check if the loaves are baked thoroughly – pierce a loaf with a wooden toothpick or bamboo skewer. If the toothpick or skewer comes out clean, the loaf is done. If not, add up to five minutes more bake time, especially if doing a double batch.
11. Cool on a cooling rack. The bread stores beautifully in the freezer, wrapped in a freezer storage bag.
12. Note: If you want to make this quick bread recipe even more crumb-tender, for the flour: use 1 cup regular flour, and 1 cup cake flour.
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And They Didn\'t Live Happily Ever After