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Why Fred and George Will Never Eavesdrop Again ...	By : pittwitch Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 41509 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Why Bill, George and Fred Never Call Hermione a Bookworm � Any more.

�What�s the bloody big deal?� Bill glared at his younger brothers. �A wank is a wank, doesn�t really matter whose hand it is.�
�Bill, that is just so wrong on so many levels.� Fred groaned, throwing himself backwards on the bed. George laughed at his twin before agreeing with his older brother.
�Any old hand will do better than your own.�
Fred promptly whacked George upside the head with a pillow. Bill laughed heartily, his head thrown back, long hair falling down past his shoulders.
�Exactly,� he concurred.
Suddenly, the door flew open, and three red-headed Weasley men were face to face with one Hermione Granger, hands on hips, lips pursed, ready for a verbal lashing.
�Now you have Bill in on this little farce?� She demanded angrily. �I can�t believe you think that Remus and Sirius and PROFESSOR Snape would do such � such � things with each other, in the kitchen no less.� Hermione huffed and puffed, then crossed her arms defensively while tapping her foot in agitation.
�Hermione, if you had heard what I just heard downstairs, you would know that it is not just Remus, Sirius, and Professor Snape, but Tonks and Dumbledore as well.� Bill added with a mischievous sly grin.
Hermione�s face fell. Fred buried his head under his pillow, mumbling, �I don�t want to know � I don�t want to know � I don�t want to know.�
�Poor Freddie, too much for his virgin ears.� George laughed.
�Virgin ears my bloody arse, my virgin mind just doesn�t want to even think about � them � doing � that.�
�It�s a fact of life brother dear. How do you think we all came into being?� Bill gibed at the now red-faced twin, who groaned loud and long.
�Ugh, Bill, now you made think about Mum and Dad � doing � that.� Fred grimaced. �I don�t think I�ll ever look at a girl again.�
Hermione had the good grace to flush slightly. George had other ideas.
�That�s ok, Fred, obviously Lupin, Black and Snape are proof that it�s just as good with other men.�
Fred groaned again, this time throwing a handy book across the room at his brother. �I wonder if wizards can become priests.� He pondered aloud. Hermione started to giggle. Bill guffawed. George looked slightly green.
�You can�t be a priest, Fred. They�re celibate.� He commented in a horrified voice.
�Exactly.� Fred muttered. If possible, a light bulb would have lit over Hermione�s head to signal her sudden understanding of Fred�s discomfort. She smiled slyly at Bill, and with a wink, she pointed her wand towards the door, locking and warding it tightly.
�I think perhaps Fred requires a demonstration.� She grinned wickedly at the older red-head.
�Demonstration?� Bill paled just a bit before he started to flush from the neck up.
�That any hand will do better than his own.� Hermione flashed a self-satisfied smirk at the three males. �Isn�t that what you and George were talking about?�
�Uh � yeah �� Bill stuttered. George�s eyes grew wide as saucers. Fred�s jaw dropped and his sat bolt upright on the bed.
�Well, let me see then.� Hermione bossily demanded. �Fred in the middle please.�
�You�re � going � to � watch � us?� Fred stammered.
�Most definitely. Now, do you strip or do I strip you?� She purred, twirling her wand.
�Hermione?� George just stared at the bushy-haired young woman.
�All in the name of science, George. Just to prove Bill�s theorem.� She smiled wickedly, taking aim at his crotch.
�Okay, okay already, I�m stripping.� He yelped, not entirely confident in what all she could cause to disappear with that wicked wand of hers.
�I suggest you and Bill do the same, Fred, dear.� Hermione licked her lips in anticipation. Three suddenly quite warm men set to stripping away all their clothes, tossing them in a heap on the floor before settling on the bed, with Fred in the middle, of course.
�Now that�s my good boys,� Hermione crooned, settling on the edge of the bed between Fred�s feet. �Now show me what you like.�
All three stared at the normally quiet bookworm in shock. She grinned, arched one eyebrow cockily, and added, �Research, don�t you know.�
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Why Fred and George Will Never Eavesdrop Again ...