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Wish Upon A Star	By : newyorican Category: Harry Potter Crossovers > Slash - Male/Male Views: 20363 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer and Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling. No money is being made from writing this story and no infringement is intended.

Chapter List
- 8
- 9
- 10
Chapter 8 – An Emotional Attachment

"Star light, star bright, shooting star up in the sky…I wish I may, I wish I might, have this guy my heart can't fight…"

/Edward/Harry

One week, three days, six hours, forty-five minutes, and seventeen seconds had passed.

Not that Edward was counting. He ran his hand through his bronze-colored hair and sighed irritably. Ever since he had told Harry that his mate was a vampire, there had been a sort of awkwardness between them. Something had flashed in Harry's eyes, but it was gone before Edward had the chance to identify it. His dead heart clenched painfully. He felt angry with himself—angry because a good part of him (possibly the majority) felt disappointed that his mate wasn't a brave, noble, sexy, kind, and amazing star. Another part (possibly the minority) tried to harshly stomp that terribly bitter feeling, but it didn't work.

Confused, angry, and feeling strangely empty, Edward tried to avoid Harry. It was hard, though. He couldn't stand to look in those beautiful emerald pools and see hurt, confusion, and sadly enough acceptance. Still, Edward couldn't stop the excuses to not open his Inner Eye from pouring from his lips, nor could he stop the growing bitterness in his chest. It was getting harder to mask the ugly feelings from Jasper. Edward knew he had to do something, and do it quick.

He'd only avoided Harry for one week, three days, six hours, fifty-six minutes, and forty-nine seconds, but it was one week, three days, six hours, fifty-six minutes, and forty-nine seconds too long.

Mind made up, Edward walked down the stairs and cleared his throat gently. It wasn't necessary, but Edward had been torturously avoiding Harry for a while. The least he could do was inform Harry (and the rest of his family) where he was going.

The minute he saw Harry, however, his chest burst with a plethora of emotions. Jasper flinched against Alice, making her glance at him and consequently lose the game she'd been playing. Alice then directed her attention back to Edward, a frown at her lips. She, along with the rest of the family, had been forced to make excuses to Harry and attempt to explain Edward's deplorable behavior. They hadn't known the star very long, but he didn't deserve Edward being an ass to him.

"I need to go speak with Carlisle," Edward said softly, ignoring the snarling thoughts of Rosalie, worried ponders of Esme, and questioning glances from Harry. "I should be back in an hour."

He didn't wait for a response. Grabbing his jacket and car keys, Edward walked out of the front door and hopped into his Volvo. He glanced at the house one last time, where he could hear Harry quietly asking Esme if he'd done something to upset Edward, and drove off. The drive to the hospital was quiet, almost solemn. Edward glanced at the mirror and turned it away from him.

He needed to speak with Carlisle about all of his conflicting emotions.

When he arrived at the hospital and quietly asked the night nurse if his father was available, wariness and nervousness held him in their grasp. He sat down as the nurse paged Carlisle, though Edward knew Carlisle had already heard him in the lobby, and shook his leg impatiently.

"Edward? What are you doing here so late?"

Edward stood up at the sound of Carlisle's voice and leaned in close, saying softly, "I need to talk to you."

Carlisle looked him over before nodding, gesturing for Edward to follow him into the empty break room. "Is everything alright?" he asked as he sat down.

Edward began to pace, worrying his bottom lip as he tried to think of the right way to blurt out what the hell he was feeling. "I'm so fucking confused," he began, running his hand through his hair again. "Carlisle, I don't know what to do?"

The older vampire had a clue why, but asked, "What about?"

"I really want my mate," Edward said as he stopped pacing and sat across from Carlisle. He leaned in close, his eyes widening slightly. "I've waited a few lifetimes for my mate, and I really want him."

"Yes, that's why Harry is helping you."

"That's the thing," Edward blurted out. "I barely know him, but I have…the thing is…I'm attracted to him. There's like this string pulling me towards him, and I want him."

Carlisle nodded diplomatically. "Yes, Jasper informed us of your…attraction…when you went to 'feed' last time."

Edward swallowed thickly and ignored Carlisle's air quotations. "When I opened my Inner Eye last week, I could see my mate. I could see him, Carlisle, and he's a vampire."

"Are you sure?" Carlisle asked curiously.

"Positive," Edward replied in dismay. "He glittered in the sun, Carlisle. How many creatures do that?"

"Harry does that," Carlisle pointed out.

"Not in the sun. Hell, Harry doesn't even really go out in the sun. He sleeps during the day, and whenever he does sparkle, it makes his eyes glow this really nice shade of green. And—" Edward cut himself off, realizing he was rambling. "I don't even know what I'm saying. I'm so lost and confused."

"Lost and confused about what? Your attraction to Harry?"

"Yes," Edward growled, glaring at his hands. "I shouldn't feel so attracted to him. He's helping me find my mate, and I'm very grateful for that, but I'm scared to let him continue. I don't…I don't want him to keep opening my Inner Eye, Carlisle. I feel horrible and I'm disgusted with myself, but I don't…I just don't want to see my mate." He closed his eyes in shame.

"Why not, Edward?" Carlisle asked softly, leaning forward.

Edward exhaled shakily and looked up, reminding Carlisle of the scared seventeen-year-old he'd met in Chicago dying of the Spanish Influenza epidemic. "Because my mate's not Harry," he choked out. "And it's the strangest thing because I haven't known Harry that long, but ever since I met him, I just keep getting these vibes and these feelings pulling me towards him. Like he's actually a planet and I just need to gravitate towards him.

"I learned about his past; he shared something highly personal and I've never felt so protective of someone. It was different than wanting to protect the family, Carlisle. The protectiveness that he evoked within me was more feral; almost animalistic. When I found out about my mate, I should've been happy. I should've been ecstatic that I was a step closer to finding my mate and having that fairy tale ending that everyone else has. Instead, I was disappointed and angry and hurt. It's all so confusing and I don't know what to do. I can't avoid him forever, but I can't be around him, either. I don't even know who my mate is and I'm already betraying him; it's disgusting."

Carlisle reached out and squeezed Edward's knee. "When I saw Esme for the first time, I immediately felt a pull towards her," the doctor said suddenly. "It was like a tug at my soul and I wanted to know everything about her. When she died and I made her into a vampire, I could recognize her more as my mate. She was drawn to me as well, even when she was human. It became a lot stronger after she was turned."

Edward listened with rapt attention, staring at his hands in his lap and at Carlisle's hand squeezing his knee. "What are you saying?" he asked tiredly.

"I'm saying, have you ever considered that maybe Harry is your mate?" Carlisle looked hesitant, not wanting to give Edward false hope but not wanting Edward to brush off the possibility so quickly.

Edward blinked. "Carlisle, he isn't a vampire," he said slowly, trying to get make the other vampire understand him.

"No," Carlisle agreed, "but he could be."

Edward shook his head. "No," he denied. "I wouldn't damn him like that, Carlisle. He's too special to live this lifestyle."

Carlisle stared at Edward sadly. "He could make you happy, Edward."

"I have a mate, Carlisle," Edward repeated. He closed his eyes tightly and squeezed his hands together. "Before Harry, I would've given anything to have my mate with me."

"And now?" Carlisle asked gently.

"And now, I would give anything to have my mate be Harry," Edward admitted, opening his eyes and exposing Carlisle to his raw, tortured expression. "I know you must be disappointed with me. Heck, I'm disappointed with myself. I have a mate, and yet I want someone else. It's…disgraceful. But, I can't help it. I just want…"

Carlisle moved out of his chair and knelt in front of Edward, holding his son's face in his hands. "Edward, I am not disappointed in you," he told him gently. "I understand what you're feeling, son. I also understand that your Inner Eye vision isn't perfect. Do not assume that after the second time you opened it that your assumptions about your mate being a vampire is correct. By pushing Harry away, you are hurting both him and yourself. Wait a little longer, Edward. Be completely sure that he is not your mate and then decide where to go from there."

Edward stared into Carlisle's eyes, searching for and easily finding the truth and sincerity in the words. "What if Harry isn't my mate?" he asked quietly. "I want him more than I've ever wanted anyone, Carlisle. What do I do if he's not the one? I'm not sure if I could handle that…"

Carlisle stood and pulled Edward into a hug. "That's what you have us for, Edward," he whispered in his son's hair. "Esme, Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie. We'll be here for you no matter what."

They remained silent for a few moments before Edward pulled away and gave the other vampires a tiny smile. "Thank you, Carlisle," he said softly.

Carlisle returned the smile ten-fold before his features became serious once more. "I meant it, Edward," he said sincerely. "We'll be here when you need us." His expression changed and his tone seemed a little more reprimanding," Now you need to go back home and apologize to Harry. He's been very sad since you started avoiding him."

Edward was already out of the room, nodding his head as he jogged out of the hospital at a human's speed. 'I'm sorry, Harry…'
- 8
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Wish Upon A Star