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Well, Ain't That Strange?	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 56074 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 12
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and make no money off this story

Chapter List
- 8
- 9
- 10
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Beta'd by the most amazing Tenchi, who I can't thank enough for all the hard work she does for me!

Chapter 8

“So, we're going to do the bonding today?” Remus asked as he looked over the spell in the book.
“Yes,” Sirius said with a firm nod. “We need to get this done fast. The timeline for getting us out of here has been bumped up. In fact, we're going to push for it as fast as we can.”
“Why?” Arthur asked, looking between the two, concerned. “Has something happened?”
“Yeah, he's gotten a dose of reality when it comes to staying with Harry's relatives and how bad it is,” Sirius said with a grin, sipping at his soft drink. Shaking his head, he said, “He actually had a mild anxiety attack over it last night brought on by how confining that room is with the three of us in it. The elves have it as expanded much as they can, but it's still too small to hold us and all the other things we need.”
“Honestly, we didn't realize it would be that small and there's no way to expand it more than it is because it's not a magical house.” Harry told them with a sigh. “I think if we have to spend too much time in it, we're all going to go mental. We stay out of it as much as we can, but even facing the realization we have to go there at night is enough to put you in a bad mood. Lucius isn't used to it and just isn't handling this well. We all agree that we'll be better off at Grimmauld Place. That way he can roam, even if it is just as a cat. It's got to be better than this. For all of us.”
“I don't think we considered that,” Arthur said quietly, shaking his head.
“We're also afraid that he might end up doing something to Vernon, Petunia or Dudley. They've gotten real nasty over the last few days. That started before we brought Lucius in, but it's grown worse. Dudley actually tried to kick him last night when we came in and were going down the hall. From his end, I wouldn't blame him a damned bit if he did something to any of them with how they're acting. They're stretching my patience. Nothing I'm doing is working when it comes to them. I've threatened plenty and they just don't want to leave us alone. Lucius' cat form is just their latest bitch and reason to be nasty. We need out, for the sake of all our sanity.” Sirius explained, looking sour.
“If they had any form of common sense at all, you being there would back them off. It should indicate that they need protection. We won't even mention what they know about you,” Remus said quietly, putting the book down and pushing it to Arthur, who was going to do the spell so there wouldn't be as much of an uproar when it was found out.
“It's not,” Harry sighed. “They know he's there and is always right beside me as Padfoot. It just keeps going. Most of what they are complaining about is made up anyway. It's just—you don't want to know,” he said with a shrug, looking between the two.
“I'm going to pull out the biggest gun I have to use until we get out. It'll work for maybe a day, but I doubt any longer than that,” Sirius told them with a sigh. Before they could ask, he explained, “That the minute I leave with Harry, those wards are gone. And that's the truth. Once we leave, those wards are going to fall because his home will then be with me.”
Blowing out a breath and shaking his head, Arthur said, “Albus is going to have fits over that.”
“Let him. There isn't a damned thing he can do,” Sirius told him firmly. “When we do this bonding, Harry's home is with me. That will send him scrambling to figure out what's going on. Of course, that means we need to prepare for that chunk of this mess, but he can't change it.” Shaking his head, he said, “I'm done playing here. There is no way in hell, after what I've seen since coming to stay in that hellhole, Harry's ever going back. Those wards are useless by now anyway. We all know that. I'm not going to play this game with Albus. Let him fumble, I don't care. He's tortured Harry enough by forcing him to stay there.”
“Agreed,” Remus told him with a nod. “That means we have to prepare for a mess. How are you going to push this faster? I can see multiple Death Eaters showing up and sticking around. Is there something else?”
“There is one thing and it'll send everyone scrambling, causing a right panic. We won't do that unless we get Arthur's permission,” Sirius said, looking at the man in question.
Slightly wide-eyed, Arthur asked, “What's that?”
“Lucius can arrange for a couple of known Death Eaters to show around the Burrow, acting like they are looking at the wards.” Hearing the man start to sputter, eyes widening more, he soothed, “One of them is going to be Lucius. He's not going to do anything. He'll get your approval for the others. We have his assurance, and he wasn't lying, that the ones they'll use are high-ranking enough that they will follow orders to the letter. They won't do anything, he's given us his word. He said he just wants Molly or the kids to see them, nothing more. It's your choice, though. It'll drive Albus into a panic and push him in the direction we want him to go.”
Rubbing a trembling hand over his face, Arthur looked at Sirius then to Remus before asking, “You're sure there is no trick here? I don't want to put my family at risk.”
“He's given us his word,” Harry told him firmly. “He says if it makes you feel better, he'll do it alone. That will be enough to set everyone off, we know it.”
Thinking it over, looking between the two, then glancing to Remus, he gave a tentative nod. “I can handle that. Just—make sure it's just him, no one else. One glimpse of him is going to send Molly into a right panic. That should be more than enough to do what we need.”
“We'll tell him,” Sirius said with a firm nod. “Or you can when he gets here. Him showing up is going to be the next to the last thing we pull. The day after he shows up there, he's going to turn up here and get into it with Harry. That should be all we need.”
“We thought that if he puts in an appearance at the Burrow, and he's not going to do anything, we promise, that Dumbledore is going to think they are just waiting for me to turn up there, as that's where I usually go, to try something. Lucius isn't going to show up there for no reason, at least that's what we hope he thinks.” Harry said. Then, quietly, he added, “Even I know those wards won't hold up to a Death Eater attack. You're not in danger of that, obviously, but it's common enough knowledge that it should work.”
“You're right,” Arthur said, still looking pale and trembling slightly. “Too many people are keyed into them for them to hold up to a full assault.”
“We get this is a lot to ask, Arthur,” Sirius told him sincerely. “We just need out. And this is all we have to push it. I don't want you in the position Albus will put you in if we don't do something drastic. That's going to lead to questions none of us want to answer, from plenty of directions.”
Thinking that over, Arthur gave a slow nod, “You're right and I understand. We—I just—this is a right nightmare. All of it. Everything I thought was going on is wrong. The cause we thought was just, isn't. It's—there is so much here and I can't say anything to those I normally would. The longer this goes on, the worse it's going to get.”
“I know,” Sirius said softly. “You don't have to tell any of us that. It's bad. How I'm going to face that old man with what I know is beyond me. We won't even talk about Snape. I think the worst is that Albus truly believes this is the right thing to do because he doesn't have the information we do, something we can't give him without giving up how we know it. I should never have had to hide what I am when it comes to Harry. We have no choice. And we never have. That's wrong too. We can't say what we know because no one would believe us. Part is going to come out; the bonding. And hell is going to come when it does. I already know that. Even with proof, I'm well aware of what people are going to say to and about me. Molly is going to be among the worst. Her I can handle because I know where it comes from and it's her trying to protect Harry. Others won't be that way.”
“We've talked about just revealing what's there and let everything come, well at least with me and Sirius,” Harry said, looking between the two across the table. Shaking his head, he then added, “It would solve some problems, but create ones that might end up worse. That's the nightmare. I can't go back to school. That's not possible. I can't be away from Sirius long enough to do that. He's innocent of the charges he went to prison for, something that's about to be proven, but is going to catch hell for something neither of us had a choice in. It might end up even worse because of that.”
“And none of this is factoring Lucius into the mess,” Sirius told them with a shake of his head, looking down at the table. “I get his end, I really do. We're all being manipulated. Dragging him into the middle and forcing him to face Albus would create a bigger nightmare than what we already have. He's just giving us what we've been trying to find for the last year; an out. That's all we want. The rest of this mess will play itself out while we're hiding. Honestly, that's the only option I see here, unless you two can come up with something we haven't.” Stopping, he looked between them and waited, though he doubted they had anything either.
“There's nothing, Sirius,” Remus told him quietly with a sad look on his face. “We didn't have anything before Lucius dropped into this. Whatever we were even considering went up in smoke when he did. He's giving you the only workable thing we've been able to find.”
“If Harry were one year older I would say just take him and run then let the dust settle. He's just one year shy of the magical number there. And with you about to be cleared, we're stuck. I get that,” Arthur told him, sounding frustrated.
“We don't think, even if we do run, that Albus will leave us alone. He's counting on Harry for something with this mess and won't stop at anything to get him. That's what we're worried about. I thought about the States plenty of times when it comes to just up and vanishing. If I had thought I could have pulled it off, I would have done it. Until I'm cleared, nothing like that would work as it would just have a bigger price on my head than is already there. This is the out we need, but it also means we have to play the game until we take it. That's going to be the bitch.” Sirius told him, shaking his head. Lowering his voice, he added, “And we won't talk about the number of times over the last few years I've kicked myself in the arse for not going with my instincts and just taking Harry with me when I ran. That's what I wanted to do, but refrained, thinking that Albus was doing what was for the best.”
“You should have or had me do something to get him to you,” Remus admitted, rubbing his face in a tired way. “That's neither here nor there now, though. We're stuck with what we have to work with. And this is all we have. We'll work with it.”
“We will,” Arthur said with a firm nod. “My name is attached to what we're going to do and I'll back you up all the way then keep a leash on Molly over it. I don't like doing this, but I'm glad you let me know what is really going on. It makes it easier knowing I'm doing the right thing with this and not being left in the dark. It's also giving me plenty to keep an eye out for, things I never would have thought of before this. While I don't like what I see, I'm grateful knowing most of it.” Shaking his head, he sighed and looked at the book with the spell in it. Changing topics, he asked, “How are you going to work this? Both getting the paper to the Ministry, hiding it and Lucius' name then pressing on?”
“We're going to have you do the bonding. Lucius has the spell to use to obscure his name on the paper. It's simple enough, so nothing to worry about there. Once it's done, he's going to take a trip to the Ministry and have it filed, though it's going to vanish somewhere for as long as he can manage it. After that, it's a wait and see game to determine what this blasts us with. Harry and I should be fine as the bond has solidified. It's Lucius' end we don't know about. Whatever comes with that, we're hoping to hold out until we get to Grimmauld Place to work with it. He's staying put most of the time from here on out, other than a couple of hours a day, so we'll satisfy most of it that way. We want to put off consummating it until Grimmauld Place if we absolutely can manage as we aren't sure if a spanner might turn up here or there to throw us off until we get there. That way we don't suffer the way Harry and I did when we had to separate.” Seeing nods, he asked, “How is my room coming there? Is it ready, or are you still working on it?”
“It's ready,” Remus told him firmly. “The elves have it expanded, cleaned and new furnishings in it. It's very nice, like having your own apartment. Even if Lucius is stuck in there for extended periods of time, he won't end up going mental. They've got all the wards and other spells up they can manage. Arthur and I added plenty ourselves. No one but you three can actually get in there by just opening the door. Arthur and I can get in now. Once you take up occupancy, you'll have to let us in via your wand. No one else can get in, period. You two can probably add more protections when you get there, but it should be safe and no one can detect anything off with Lucius.”
“Good,” Sirius said, pleased.
“One thing here,” Harry said, quietly, looking at Mr. Weasley. “Hermione's cat. We need to keep him away. He can detect if you're an animagus. That's how he discovered Wormtail and caused the problems he did. Though Lucius isn't trying to trick us, he is everyone else. I doubt that collar he has is going to work on Crookshanks.”
“And that is something I never would have thought of. Good thinking, Harry,” Arthur said with slightly wide eyes. “She's staying with us, so I'll make sure the cat doesn't come along when we visit. With all that's coming, I'm sure Molly is going to press to move back in there to help. I'll come up with something on my end to make sure we don't. Then I'll make sure the cat stays home. I would suggest Lucius stay as far away from Hermione as he can so Crookshanks doesn't pick up on the scent or any stray hairs that are left behind. If we can't manage that, I'll make damned sure I Scourgify her before we leave, in a way she doesn’t notice, of course, so he can't. After that, I'll keep an eye on the cat to see if he acts off when we return. If he does, we'll go about this another way.”
“We can't hide the cat, honestly,” Sirius said, though pleased Harry remembered that possible spanner. “Everyone is going to see him and we want them to so they don't suspect anything. Let's see what he can find on his end to block something. Not sure if we can, honestly, but it's worth looking into. We'll go from there after that.” Looking up, he then said, “Here he comes. Good. We can get this done and go from there with whatever is tossed our way.” Chuckling, he added, “And see how many new problems this brings up when we aren't done dealing with the ones already here.”
“True,” Remus said with a small smile. Shaking his head, he added, “It can only help. We know what happened with you and Harry. A repeat of that isn't something we need, Sirius.”
“Oh, hell no it isn't,” Sirius agreed with a firm nod. “We'll deal as it comes, all I can say.”

Sighing, Lucius said, “The paper is filed and official. I made a big enough donation that it's not going to turn up for months unless someone goes specifically looking for it. My name is obscured for a year. Nothing, nowhere, can reveal it, I don't care what spell they use. So, we're good on that front. Now we press on.” He had just returned from the Ministry and they were waiting for nightfall to return to the house. So, they were going to cover what they could and go over the plans in place so everyone was on the same page.
“Good.” Sirius sighed in relief, holding Harry tightly to him. “One part of this mess handled. Alright, from here on out, what's the timeline we're working with? I need to know so I can warn Arthur when you turn up. That and so we know what we're dealing with and how to go about working with it.”
“We have five days before I step in, at least that's the plan now. We can bump it up if we have to,” Lucius told him, launching in. “Starting tomorrow, some of the Death Eaters are going to turn up around here, making damned sure they're seen by those keeping watch and Arabella. She knows that it's nothing to worry about, but that we want it reported to Albus. If in doubt, she knows to get a message to you to ask. The day before I turn up over at the Burrow, the Dark Lord himself is going to come over, Polyjuiced, with Bella. She's unhinged, we know that, but if he's with her, she'll keep it under control. We're going to make damned sure everyone sees her and she says something to Harry. What we want you to do then is owl Albus, as would be expected. It was our thought that her turning up is going to stir the pot enough that Albus starts planning to get you both out, quickly. Then I'm going to turn up at the Burrow and make a comment about weak wards, something that's going to drive him the way we want. The final day is the confrontation with Harry. If it goes as planned, we're out that night.”
Thinking it over, Sirius gave a slow nod, “It sounds like it could work. If things start going downhill, can we bump it up?”
“We can,” Lucius told him firmly. “Bella and I are going to be the big ones when it comes to this. The minute she turns up, Albus is going to move, we know it. We can bring her in at any time. The Dark Lord knows how bad this is, I've told him, so he's ready to go at a moments notice with it. If we have to, when he shows up with Bella, I'll go to the Burrow right after they leave. That should set everything in motion we need. I have the elves moving everything I require over to Grimmauld Place as we speak. They'll make sure it stays hidden, of course. Everything else is as ready as we can get it. Now it's just waiting to move.”
“Works for us,” Sirius told him. “One thing about Grimmauld Place and to keep watch for.” Quickly, he ran him through the information about Hermione's cat. “Stay away from her. It's fine to be seen, but don't engage.”
“Ginny either,” Harry added. “She adores cats, so she'll try. Stay away. The two generally share a room when Hermione's at the Burrow, so it's best not to risk it.”
“Understood,” Lucius told them, pleased with that bit of knowledge. “I'll let myself be seen to ensure everyone knows I'm there, but won't let them touch. However, we do need to come up with a suitable name.”
“Hobbes,” Harry said with a grin. “How about Sir Hobbes of Hanover? That sounds posh enough.”
Snickering, Sirius asked, “Do I want to know where you got that?”
“It's the name of a tiger in a comic strip I like, nothing too off. That and a monk who held the human race in great disdain. I thought it rather fit a snobby type cat.” Harry chuckled.
Amused, Lucius said, “It sounds like a good name. We can craft the pure-breed certificate for him and it will fit.”
“Not a Marauder type name, but I can work with it,” Sirius grinned. “I would have thought more like Fuzzypaws or something.”
“I don't think someone is going to name a pure-breed Persian that, Sirius,” Harry laughed.
“True! Yours is better for that so we'll do it.” Sirius chuckled.
“And before we leave this disgusting abode we're confined to, I am shedding all over that house,” Lucius said firmly, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I'll help you,” Sirius said, grinning bigger. “She'll be cleaning for weeks when we're done with it.” Sobering up, he said, “Look, it's bad, we know it, just don't do anything to them. Let me work with this the best I can. I'm going to pull out everything I can to back them off. Just avoid them all. Let Harry carry you around, that'll stop the worst of it.”
“I will,” Lucius sighed. “I would rather not be put in a position where I'm forced to defend myself.”
“We'll watch your back. Stick with Harry and have him hold you. That should end it there.” Changing topics, he then asked, “Anything off on your end with the bond yet? Or anything odd?
“So far, nothing,” Lucius told him honestly. “In fact, it seems to be calming the overwhelming urges. How long that will last or if it'll press for something else, I don't know. Right at the moment, I'm good and more relaxed. It's as though it gelled something and backed off the urgency.”
“That's a relief,” Sirius said with a pleased look on his face. “We're going to try to hold off on consummation until we move. Not that we care anymore, that's not it, more like whatever hell that can unleash then any problems that come up won't be massive. The first few days after that is it pulling at you to solidify. We don't need that now. Let us get somewhere we don't have to worry about being separated by issues we can't predict before we push that end. After all, we don't know what spanners someone can toss in here.”
“That's wise and I agree,” Lucius told him with a nod. “I'll also suggest that we pack up everything of yours you don't need and get it ready. We'll craft a carrier for me as well. That way when it hits, we're ready to go and not scrambling.”
“We'll work on that tonight,” Sirius told him, liking the idea. “It'll give us something to do besides let the small space make us mental.” Then he began asking about the house and other things that needed to be in place for when they could get out so he knew what was going on.

* snickers * Alright, let's see how many of you get where the cat's name came from!
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Well, Ain't That Strange?