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You Will Not Kiss Me	By : Prosperosdaughter Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 22836 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: JK Rowling & her associates own the Harry Potter universe and I make no money from my stories.

Chapter List
- 95
- 96
- 97
Chapter 96: Broken Fidelity

They had agreed they would approach Dumbledore after the next full moon. Although Snape would never reveal it to Lupin, part of him was desperate for Tonks to know the truth of them – to understand how greatly she trespassed in her propositioning of Lupin. He knew Lupin tried to be kind and understanding; but Snape found he just couldn't empathise with her – just couldn't understand how David had been put aside so readily.

"I think I understand, Severus," Lupin had said. "I believe it is easier for her to transfer her affection for David to me than having to confront her grief and deal with it."

"A coward's way out!" snarled Snape.

"Everyone copes in different ways," chided Lupin, softly. "And some can't cope at all. If only Albus hadn't Obliviated her, we could have helped her - especially you - you are the mate of a werewolf. You could have helped her."

"I am hardly the most empathetic man, Remus."

"But you would have. I know your heart, Severus. I saw the two of you in Romania - the understanding you shared. None of this would be happening if she hadn't been Obliviated," said Lupin, sadly.

"You are always ready to believe the best in people," Severus said, his voice gentling. "But I don't believe it changes how she has tried to replace her mate so quickly. No-one could replace you …" and Snape's voice stopped in his throat at the thought of it. Lupin pulled him close and caressed his face.

"Nor you. Not ever."

oooOOOooo

"You are sure, Severus?" asked Dumbledore, as he paced behind his desk.

"Five times now. Rowle outside the school gates. Alecto Carrow two days later, after the meeting, Amycus two days after that. Rowle followed me again to Hogsmeade on Friday and last night."

"And you're sure Voldemort has not given orders for it?"

"No, it's Bellatrix. She's constantly trying to undermine me." Snape pinched the bridge of his nose, recalling their argument after his last summons to the Dark Lord.

"You still distrust me, Bella," said Snape, his eyebrow raised, as she had sneered at him as he left his audience with the Dark Lord.

"Blood is everything, Snape! Blood will always out!" the witch spat at him, her eyes alight with fervour.

How he longed to tell her that it was he, Severus Snape, who shared blood status with the Dark Lord – that of a Muggle father and a pure-blood witch – and how both had the taint of Lycanthropy. How he would enjoy her fury.

"Why don't you tell our master just that, Bellatrix?" replied Snape silkily. "Tell him how half-bloods can never be worthy."

"I'm keeping my eye on you. I'll get the evidence and then we'll see who is trustworthy," she hissed back at him, like a she-cat.

"Even if it means compromising the work I do for the Dark Lord? Having me followed by the most inept of spies? Really, Bella? What value will I have as a spy if the old man thinks I am not trusted?"

A malicious smile twisted Bellatrix's once fine features.

"Trusted? I know you can't be trusted, Snape. And I'll get the evidence to prove it!" she hissed again.

"And one by one your incompetent henchmen will fail just as they have consistently failed so far, not least because there is nothing for them to find," Snape curled his lip in disdain. Whilst Snape knew he had everything to hide, Bellatrix reckoned without Snape's own formidable skill and knowledge he had used in evading detection for many years now.

"It is dangerous to both you and Remus that she is constantly trying to track you. Please re-consider putting the flat on the Floo network, Severus. At least then, your Apparition from the castle perimeter to your flat will be unnecessary."

Snape's brow furrowed. He had resisted it for a long time. He had hoped to keep their home closed to outside access. To Snape, being on the Floo network would weaken the Fidelius. But now, there was another imperative: if one of Bellatrix's cronies managed to track him as he left the school for the flat, all could be lost. Flooing from the Headmaster's office would be safest, without doubt. If the Ministry fell - then Snape could disconnect the flat from the Floo network. Yes. Perhaps, it was workable after all.

Snape's mouth pinched then he nodded abruptly.

"Very well."

oooOOOooo

From the doorway at the appointed time, Spiritus Vitae in hand, Snape watched Dumbledore in silence. Had it been anyone else, Snape would have thought they were unaware of his presence, but he knew Dumbledore was never unaware. So Snape stood and watched as Dumbledore traced the fingers of his uninjured hand over the stone wall behind his chair outlining something that only Dumbledore could see.

As Snape watched, the glint of something caught his eye. The Sword of Gryffindor lay on Dumbledore's desk. He frowned, but then Dumbledore spoke.

"This will be the place, Severus. When I die, this is where my portrait will appear."

"Why do I need reminding of that?" snapped Snape, bridling. Snape's jaw set as he wondered if Dumbledore delighted in tormenting him in his own subtle way as much as the Dark Lord delighted in his more obvious torments. Sometimes, it seemed that he did.

Dumbledore turned to him, and Snape felt a wash of remorse. Dumbledore looked more frail than Snape had ever seen him. It could only be a matter of months now, Snape was sure.

"Not a reminder," said Dumbledore, gently. "I need to teach you a Charm, Severus. It is a complex Charm. You will not be able to use it yet." Dumbledore sat himself in his chair and indicated to the chair Snape always took, and then Dumbledore's hand brushed over the hilt of the sword before he turned his attention back to Snape.

"Only the Headmaster can channel the stone of the castle or form tunnels through it and into the grounds. I need to teach this to you now. I confess, I've only used it once before -"

"- the tunnel to the Shrieking Shack?" finished Snape, his voice low.

"Precisely."

Dumbledore drew the sword from his desk and looked at it intently.

"I have had to make a number of plans in advance. One of them is to keep this sword safe after my death."

The sword usually sat in its glass case on the wall. Surely, it would be safe there. Snape's eyes flicked to the case and he gasped to see a second sword in the case.

"I don't ..."

Dumbledore raised his hand to quieten him.

"This," said Dumbledore, placing the sword back on his desk, "is the true Sword of Gryffindor. And that," he indicated with a small gesture of his hand, "is a transfiguration of an ordinary sword. It would fool any eye but that of a goblin."

"Why is this necessary?" asked Snape, peering at the sword.

"Ah! Yet another mystery, I'm afraid, Severus; and yet another service I must ask of you. My end could come at any time." Snape gritted his teeth but nodded abruptly. "To ensure the sword's safety should it be earlier than I hope, I am entrusting it to you for safe-keeping. Will you secret it in your quarters?"

"I, Albus?"

"You will be appointed as Headmaster ..."

"... I may be languishing in Azkaban! What of your precious sword then?" Snape hissed.

"I believe Voldemort will shield you until the Ministry falls. Then your appointment will be made. As soon as you are appointed, I want you to cast the Charm I will teach you to make a recess behind my portrait. It is there you can stow the sword so it will be safe."

"You talk in riddles, man," said Snape, gruffly, trying to hide his growing discomfort.

"A decoy, Severus. This duplicate will be a decoy when the time comes, but the real sword will be safe. The sword will be key to the downfall of Voldemort. It must be kept safe at all costs."

"How will I know the appropriate time?" asked Snape.

"I will guide you, of course," said Dumbledore mildly. Snape closed his eyes: his portrait. His portrait would gaze upon Snape every day. It sent an unpleasant shiver up Snape's spine.

"A constant reminder of my crime," he muttered.

"A reminder of your acts of compassion," said Dumbledore. He gave Snape a small smile of reassurance, then picked up his wand. "Come, Severus. Let us begin."

oooOOOooo

Snape bolted through the corridors of the castle, his heart pounding hard, looking around himself for the one following him. Every time he had taken secret passageways or byways that he thought no-one else knew, he would hear his pursuer's footsteps within seconds of thinking he was safe.

He had been trying to outrun his pursuer for a long time, but the he was unable to shake him. Snape knew, in the way of dreams, that he had to keep one step ahead to keep his pursuer away from the room in which he had stored his most precious secret.

The pursuit was relentless and, no matter how fast Snape ran, the echoing footsteps gained on him and became louder, just like the thudding of his heart and the sound of blood rushing in his ears.

Just when he thought his heart would burst with anxiety, Dumbledore appeared before him, and the pursuing footsteps faded from Snape's hearing, but his terror grew.

"You know what you must do."

Dumbledore's face was illuminated by sickly green light and then Snape was running – running as fast as he could – and yet it was like wading through treacle. Others were coming for him now – hunting him - he felt their oppressive presence – legions of Dementors swooped towards him to sap his soul.

"No! It was done to save my soul! Leave me!" Snape yelled at them, unable to Conjure even a non-corporeal Patronus as dread permeated every pore of his skin. Occlumency could not defend him from the Kiss.

"But murder shreds the soul, Severus. You know that," a mirror image of himself said, arms crossed, sneering at him.

"No," he gasped, as the weight of the Dementors' oppression became too much. "Not murder. No!" Snape fell to his knees as his good memories began to leach away from him, leaving him with his manifold memories of loneliness, betrayal and pain. He called out in distress.

Suddenly, a huge silver wolf bounded forward, harrying the Dementors away from Snape's prone and gasping body.

"Severus! Severus!"

"Severus," said Lupin gently as Snape awoke from the nightmare with a mighty gasp, sitting bolt upright, his whole body trembling and drenched in sweat, as strong, warm arms embraced his torso. Lupin's head rested against this shoulder.

"My love," whispered Lupin, and gentle hands caressed him to calm him. "Be still." Light, long fingers stroked his face gently as soft lips kissed his neck. Snape panted to control his breathing, listening to the calming tone of Lupin's voice.

"Dearest Remus," he managed to gasp as he rested his cheek against Lupin's head, feeling safe at last in the embrace of the man he loved, for who else understood the horror of Snape's nightmares and his desperate need for reassurance, if not fully the reasons why?

oooOOOooo

The full moon had come round again, to Snape, it seemed too quickly. And yet, they had regained their perfect trust in one another since the terrible full moon when Snape had discovered the truth of the fate of the boy. This time, before the moon, Lupin's taking of Snape had been the purifying ritual that it always seemed in Snape's mind, his many cares wiped from his mind completely by his acquiescence and abandonment to it, total and fulfilling.

The night had been restful between man and wolf, contented and quiet.

The morning came, fresh and new with spring in the air, even in London. Reverted once more, Lupin had curled around Snape, stroking his face, his own face buried in Snape's shoulder, murmuring his happiness. With the improvements to the Wolfsbane and healing potions, Lupin's healing was faster and more complete than ever. The days were growing longer, and they had a little time before both had to leave for work.

Snape drew his fingers along Lupin's jaw. The face he loved looked up to him, pale, but not too pale, blue eyes soft with love and then darkening with desire as Snape's fingers travelled gently along Lupin's throat.

Snape loved to see the longing in Lupin's eyes, to feel it in the warmth of the body held against him. His hands clasped his beloved's face and manoeuvred Lupin up to meet his face to kiss him softly, exploring him gently with his tongue and lips as Lupin pressed his body to his, a soft demand for the fulfilment of the waning moon.

A low moan escaped from Snape's throat, his desire for Lupin never diminishing, only ever increasing. It frightened him at times how his desire would burn so brightly with just the lightest of touches, his desire to touch and be touched, held and be held, fill and be fulfilled, never less than rapacious.

Their kissing became more urgent, soft hands on chests and backs became demanding as Snape leant forward, still kissing Lupin greedily, and pushed him onto his back and sat astride his thighs and then broke the kiss to sit up and survey his prize.

Snape stroked his hands up Lupin's body making him Lupin arch under his touch and then ran his hands over Lupin's shoulders and clasped his arms as he leant in to kiss him once more, his knee parting Lupin's legs underneath him so he could kneel between Lupin's legs before drawing himself over Lupin's body so their skins brushed against each other.

Lupin moaned softly into Snape's mouth, his own hand tracing Snape's spine and clutching his ribs each time Lupin pressed his already hard erection against Snape's stomach.

It was so tempting to take Lupin straightaway, consume him greedily this first day of the waning moon, but Snape always tried to wait – to savour Lupin's body being his once more. Even though his own body seemed to scream for urgent release, Snape subdued it.

Snape stroked Lupin's cock against his own flat stomach and watched the pleasure of it on Lupin's face, each grasping stroke pulling a gasp from Lupin's parted, moist lips. As Snape's stroke increased in speed and pressure, Lupin's gasps became louder until he pleaded with Snape to fill him, his hands raking through Snape's hair even as Lupin's hips thrust to the motion of Snape's hand, making Snape's own desire pierce through him repeatedly.

Snape's other hand left Lupin's balls to travel under and stroke into his body, eliciting a deep groan of pleasure from Lupin that shot through Snape's own groin immediately. It only took a few strokes of each of his hands in perfect timing on Lupin's writhing body before Lupin cried out that he could wait no longer. Nor could Snape. His own groin blazed and he could barely see, his eyelids had become so heavy and his eyes unfocused with hard and hot desire.

He placed himself to enter his beloved's body, and he looked up to find his lover's eyes, Lupin's eyes, meeting his – eyes that seemed to reach into his soul.

"I love you, Severus," Lupin whispered hoarsely.

Snape's heart beat hard but he pushed into Lupin's body as slowly as he could, Lupin's eyes seeming to burn into him as his own cock burned into Lupin's body, each man groaning in pleasure at the feel. Only when Snape was fully sheathed, did his eyes close and his head fell back as he gloried in the sensation, and then he moved deeply and slowly, rolling into Lupin who wrapped his legs high around Snape's body.

The extra depth of Lupin's angled body excited them both too much and Snape grasped Lupin's erection tightly to pace in time making him moan Snape's name almost constantly. Snape thrust hard and deep repeatedly and Lupin bucked in time until their pace became frantic, and then he felt the hot semen release onto his hand and stomach as Lupin shouted his name and his own pulsing waves of pleasure washed over him, colours bursting behind his eyelids, as he came fiercely into Lupin with a rough cry. He tried not to fall forward, but steadied his weakened, delirious body on his arm, panting hard and then slowly, so slowly, lowered himself into Lupin's waiting arms and the perfect contentment of knowing he was deeply loved.

oooOOOooo

The Dark Mark had burnt as the school day had ended, and the meeting had been one where the Dark Lord took his pleasures in torturing the captured Muggle-born Auror whom Yaxley had tricked into coming to the Manor alone. Snape had been Summoned to keep the prisoner alive with potions as long it pleased his Master.

The Auror's suffering had been long. Snape managed to add a fast-acting poison to the second dose that effectively closed down the wizard's nervous system so he would feel no more pain. Snape dared do no more without exposing himself but knew the man's face etched in agony would add itself to the miscellany of his nightmares.

"He has fainted, my Lord," Snape declared when the Dark Lord complained that the wizard did not scream. "His body can take no more."

The Dark Lord cursed the still breathing body over and over again, his fury unleashed as he shredded the wizard's insensate body until he tired of it and he irritably dismissed Snape. Snape bowed low and strode from the hall, nodding his goodbyes as he gained the Manor doors.

But then, something happened that made Snape freeze and his breath stuck in his throat.

In his pocket was the curtain ring that Dumbledore had Charmed all those years ago to alert Snape if Lupin activated his Charmed belt - the belt that Dumbledore had Charmed to take him through the Fidelius of the flat. Every day Snape had transferred it to the breast pocket of the shirt he wore. It was habit whenever Lupin was away from him, even just at work.

It resonated now against his heart.

Lupin had activated the Charm.

Waves of nausea swept over Snape as he struggled to keep his composure and he fought not to run to the perimeter. His husband was injured at the flat and Snape was fast becoming desperate even as he slowed his own walk.

As soon as he was clear of Malfoy's wards, his heart hammering hard in his chest and his skin cold with fear, he turned to Disapparate with the incantation Dumbledore had taught him to take him through the Fidelius of the flat.

"Porta ad virum," he mouthed silently and cleared his mind of all else to focus on the intention of the incantation as he turned into the suffocating constriction that compressed his body almost beyond endurance, feeling the bonding circlet on his arm squeeze.

It was only through a fug of fear as he turned out of his Apparition that he realised the clutch he felt on his upper arm was not his bond as his fearful mind had assumed. No – it was the long nails of a female hand clawed into his upper arm in side-along Apparition.

It was Bellatrix.

Snape didn't think twice about what he needed to do. As he turned to ground himself, he swung and hit her in the face first with his fist and then he flicked his spare wand from his sleeve as she reeled from the blow and cast a deep sleep Charm over her so that she crumpled unconscious at his feet and spun back to see Lupin collapsed, face down, on their living room floor.

"Remus!" Snape's cry was strangled as he saw the unnatural angle of Lupin's body and a spreading bloom of blood on the carpet beneath him.

Snape fell to his knees, casting the wand over Lupin. Lupin's pulse was weak and his breathing laboured and his knuckles were skinned and bruised from fighting and slashed in defensive wounds.

"Tippy!" growled Snape, his mind racing to deal with both Lupin and Bellatrix. The house-elf appeared before him, her eyes widened and her ears flattened with apprehension as she saw Lupin.

"See the witch there? Bind her so she can neither hear nor see nor move. Bind her fast, Tippy!" ordered Snape.

The elf nodded, her eyes flicking worriedly to Lupin then she quickly moved away.

Snape leaned forward to slip his arms under Lupin to move him so he could see his injuries and inhaled sharply as he saw the bruising to his face and blood from his nose and mouth.

Snape Levitated Lupin gently, ensuring no part of him was unsupported, so he could see better. As he moved Lupin, he saw the blood blossom through his clothes at his flank and stomach, and he groaned in horror. He Vanished Lupin's clothing with a sharp flick of his wand to find the injuries.

"Sweet Merlin, no!" he gasped sharply at the sight of many stab wounds, too many for him to heal with his wand in time. He had to stop the bleeding before he could do anything more. His vision had narrowed down now to nothing more than Lupin and his needs, his black eyes glittering with concentration and fear.

He Summoned his potions store from the bathroom and snatched at the phial containing a clear liquid and spelled it into Lupin's body. Immediately, the blood flow slowed and then stopped completely. As did Lupin's breath.

Snape's breathing was fast and ragged as he began to take in the damage to Lupin's body and raised his shaking hands to cast the healing spells.

"Professor Snape, let Tippy," said Tippy gently. "The witch is secure." Tippy was now at Snape's side and she took over the Levitation as Snape cast to knit and heal the deep knife wounds. Snape didn't even think to question whether Tippy had bound Bellatrix effectively. He knew better now than to ever doubt this house-elf's magic.

One by one, he carefully healed each and every stab wound – he counted sixteen, three different blades – and with each count, his heart hammered harder, his jaw became tighter and his dark eyes blazed. How and where had this happened? Who had done it? He would kill them – without compunction.

Once the stab wounds were all healed, Snape applied Dittany to the abrasions and cuts to Lupin's hands and arms. As he worked, he described the treatment to Tippy.

"I have given Master Lupin the Draught of Living Death. To all intents and purposes, he is dead to the world but, in truth, he is held in suspension. Bruising will not come until the Wiggenweld Potion is administered to bring Remus round. When the counter-potion is administered, it will also be the time to administer the Internal Injury Potion and the Blood Replenishing Potion."

Tippy listened avidly, nodding to show that she'd understood, even as she kept Lupin's body steady in mid-air.

"Shall Tippy put Master Lupin to bed now?" asked Tippy.

Snape stopped short and stared at the elf and then looked askance at Bellatrix, the sudden realisation of what her presence meant to their home hitting him full force.

"The flat is no longer safe for Master Lupin," he said, his voice hoarse, his chest full, and he breathed deeply to steady his nerves once more. "You need to take him to Madam Pomfrey at Hogwarts. Tell her exactly what I have told you. When you are sure Master Lupin is safe with Madam Pomfrey, come back to help me."

"Professor Snape is not coming?" squeaked Tippy in surprise.

"I must clean up here first." He stroked the back of his hand over Lupin's cheekbone, his pallor deathly, his breath stopped. Snape felt his throat obstruct even though he knew Lupin was not dead. A rogue tear escaped his eye and he leant over and kissed Lupin's paling lips.

"Take care of him, Tippy."

"Of course, Professor Snape."

With that, she and her charge were gone and Snape stared at the witch bound and gagged magically on the floor just feet from the pool of sticky blood, a livid bruise forming on her cheek where Snape had struck her. He wanted to strike her again. No. He wanted to kill her. He stood over her, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides, his dark eyes alight with hatred.

He and Lupin no longer had their protected home. After all his fears about a Floo connection, Snape himself had brought her through the Charm.

The Fidelius was broken.

oooOOOooo

It took time for Snape to compose himself, but he knew there was so much he had to do. Ensuring Bellatrix was still secured, he placed further spells on her with his spare wand so she could see and hear nothing. He was sure the elf's Charms were good, but he had to be certain. Lupin's life depended on him. Once he had completed the Charms, he set about going through every room in the house, collecting and packing each and every one of their possessions. The kitchen first, even ensuring Tippy's nest was packed too; the bathroom; the living room, taking care to ensure all the packing spells did not disturb the order of their respective research papers and books. He moved like an automaton, his attention fixed on one goal only: to remove every trace of their married life from this dwelling.

Then he went to the bedroom. His chest heaved painfully as he entered the room – their bed, where he spent those perfect nights in Lupin's arms, safe and loved as he had ever been, where so many interludes of perfect passion had been spent. This was his home now. He didn't want to leave it. He sat on the corner of the bed and slowly grasped a handful of the counterpane. He so didn't want to leave it. He squeezed his eyes tightly. He had to be strong. The Charm was broken. He would find a new place for them. He inhaled sharply to focus himself: he had work to do.

Then he heard the flare of the Floo and, wand at the ready, he crept to the living room door in time to see Dumbledore unfold gracefully from the fireplace, his own wand in hand.

"Dear boy," Dumbledore said, relief evident in his tone as Snape stood in the doorframe to show himself. "Tippy told me everything." Dumbledore strode into the room, heading directly towards Bellatrix. "I've asked her to remain with Remus whilst you and I take care of things here. Remus is doing well, Severus. Poppy tells me it will be a while before he's fully recovered, but he will be fine – thanks to you."

Snape felt his breathing ease as he watched Dumbledore cast quickly over Bellatrix and then he nodded to himself, then turned and cast to siphon the pool of blood from the carpet. Snape looked away from it as he began to tell Dumbledore everything from when he had been alerted by the Charm.

"But I don't know who hurt Remus."

"I received word from Bertie," said Dumbledore, adding when he saw Snape's quizzical look, "the wizarding liaison with the Master of Trinity College. Remus was not the only one attacked in the library precincts." Dumbledore sat and sighed heavily. "Another researcher for Gringotts, Jerome Porter, was also attacked by werewolves. There is no doubt, I am afraid, that they were Greyback's."

"This Porter ... he is a werewolf?"

Dumbledore nodded. "He did not survive."

Snape felt his knees weaken. He perched on the arm of a chair to stop himself stumbling. He had not known Greyback had received information on Lupin or any other werewolf at the university. Who was giving them information on Gringotts' employees? Why did Snape not know this? This was how dangerous it was to be out of the loop.

He felt as if he were drifting far away from his body. Had Lupin not carried that Charm Dumbledore had given him, he would be lost. Snape screwed his eyes shut. As it was, they were losing their home, and it wouldn't be possible for Lupin to work now if Snape could not get this information. It was simply not safe. Snape had always sworn he would do anything to keep Lupin safe.

"Let us finish here then give me your spare wand."

Snape nodded, then added, "I will need a memory to take to the Dark Lord."

They both stood, Dumbledore much more slowly than when he had first come through the Floo.

"What sort of memory, Severus?"

"One to ensure Bellatrix is dissuaded from following me again."

"So be it."

oooOOOooo

Snape Apparated at the gates of Malfoy Manor with Bellatrix in his arms. He gave the salute to show his Dark Mark and passed through, Levitating her unconscious form before him, his face settled into a genuine scowl of fury. He marched straight to the great hall where the Dark Lord was conversing with Yaxley and Wilkes. With a flourish, he dropped her at the Dark Lord's feet.

"My Lord!" He bowed and then went onto his knees. "Tell me what I have done to incur your displeasure, I beg you! All my years of work, my Lord!"

"What do you mean, Severus?" The crimson eyes were narrowed as he looked between the supplicant and the unconscious woman at his feet.

"Bellatrix followed me in my Disapparition to an Order safe house! Broke its Fidelius! The old man speaks of never trusting me again. What have I done to deserve this, my Lord?" His voice was small and weak, he hoped he judged the right amount of desperation.

"You Stunned her?"

"I hit her, my Lord. As soon as I saw Dumbledore there! I had to!" Snape did not take his eyes off the floor.

"Look at me, Severus."

He knew it would happen. He and Dumbledore had prepared for it. His eyes found the Dark Lord's.

Legilimens!

The Dark Lord ripped through his mind, finding the shreds of prepared memory of Dumbledore sneering at Snape, questioning his loyalty, deriding his competence, casting restraining and silencing spells on Bellatrix.

"How can you tell me Voldemort trusts you when he sends his least efficient servant to follow you? You disgust me ..."

Even though Snape knew it to be a concoction, that final phrase sent a wave of nausea through him in its echo of that terrible confession Snape had made to Dumbledore. The Dark Lord withdrew from Snape's mind, a sneer on his face having felt Snape's shame.

"I did not order Bellatrix to follow you. Stand, Severus."

Snape stood unsteadily, his head throbbing from the violent intrusion.

"She does not trust me, my Lord. I am impure to her."

The Dark Lord nodded, but his sneer turned on his unconscious lieutenant.

"That may be, but she has jeopardised your position. I have plans for you and we need the old man's trust ... for now. Unless she has evidence ..."

"Indeed, my Lord." Snape bowed low again, moving backwards so that the Dark Lord's attention would focus on Bellatrix.

"Rennervate!" sang the Dark Lord and Bellatrix groggily came to and started as her eyes met the peering crimson of the Dark Lord's.

"My Lord, my Lord," she gabbled, holding her face, suddenly aware of the pain, scooting backwards, doubtless feeling the dangerous reverberation of the Dark Lord's magic.

"Why were following Severus, Bella?" he hissed. "Why did you jeopardise his position?"

"My Lord, he can't be trusted. I won't have him fail you! Today has just proved it! He bound me and gagged me! Why would he need to do that if he was true to you, my Lord?" she screeched, each declaration more hysterical than the last.

"My Lord. I did no such thing. I have freely admitted that I knocked her out. I had to! Dumbledore was there and an Order member was in residence at the safe house. I was due to give him a potion but Bellatrix hitched her way through the Fidelius! Now they'll abandon it."

"Your wand, Severus." The Dark Lord held out his white hand and Snape handed over his own wand, the wand that would show no Charms of restraint or silencing, healing or clearing. The Dark Lord disgorged the previous spells, showing nothing of the spells that Bellatrix claimed. He curled his lip at her.

"My Lord … my Lord," she stuttered, pointing at Snape wildly. "He must have used another wand!"

"My Lord," Snape murmured, his tone measured and reasonable, his hands outspread. The Dark Lord turned to him. "Bellatrix surely does not understand how her actions could undermine the trust I have worked on all this years with Dumbledore! If I do not have access to the safe house in future, then who know how much information I shall miss. It matters not that she trusts me ... she needs to understand."

The Dark Lord nodded slowly, as if weighing up what Snape had said.

Bellatrix swayed nervously, her fingers twitching at her side.

"I was misguided, my Lord …" she whispered, her eyes wide and wild.

"You were stupid, Bellatrix! You seem to believe your judgement is better than mine, more acute perhaps?"

Had she not cost him so much, Snape would have felt victorious, but his heart still ached to have seen Lupin so terribly injured.

"No, no! My Lord, I beg you! It is only because …"

The Dark Lord's curse stopped her words.

"CRUCIO!"

Snape watched the witch writhe in the air as she screamed as the Dark Lord twisted his wand to ratchet up the pain she must feel for her act of treachery. There could be no real pleasure to watching it for Snape – just the grim satisfaction that she would think twice before trying to trap him again. But the cost – oh, the cost! His wonderful home with Lupin dismantled – their things, their memories, their life! He would have to find somewhere new for them – set up again, work a new Fidelius … without Dumbledore. He was surprised how much that distressed him.

When it seemed that Bellatrix could scream no more, the Dark Lord cancelled his spell, throwing the witch away from him.

Snape stood impassive, awaiting his dismissal as the Dark Lord stood watching Bellatrix twitch on the floor.

"I know she is foolish, Severus, but I cannot have her jeopardise your position like that again. I need my spy in the Order. It is too late for me to recruit anew. Do you agree?"

"Of course, my Lord," agreed Snape, distractedly.

"Good." The Dark Lord turned to him fully. "Stand before me now."

Snape realised then, he had not had his wits about him. The Dark Lord was preparing to cast, and Snape did not recognise the wand movement but he could translate the incantation as the Dark Lord spoke it.

A Tracing Jinx.

oooOOOooo

It was dawn when Snape returned by the Floo to the castle. He was desperate to see Lupin, to ensure the Wiggenweld Potion had been administered and all was on the mend. Being away from Lupin's side for these hours had been torture but he had known he could not follow his heart if Lupin was to be safe.

As Snape stepped through the fireplace, he saw Dumbledore waiting for him. He pressed Snape to sit, although Snape protested that he needed to see Lupin.

"He's still unconscious, Severus."

Snape looked startled.

"No, do not be worried. He's had the antidote to the Draught, but Poppy's keeping him unconscious for a while yet whilst his body recovers from the shock of Apparition whilst so badly injured."

"Did we do more harm than good?" whispered Snape, leaning forward in anxiety.

Dumbledore shook his head.

"Remus would have died had you not been able to help him so quickly, Severus. You did all the right things."

Snape sat back as Dumbledore gave him a phial of healing potion. Snape took it gratefully. His head was pounding still, not just from the Dark Lord's Legilimency, but tiredness and stress. He held his head in his hands as the potion worked quickly to dispel the crippling headache.

Then Snape told Dumbledore about the Tracing Jinx that the Dark Lord had worked on him.

"So he can know where I am at any given time and Bellatrix has no cause to do anything rash. As I understand it, it cannot take him through a Fidelius or any such protective enchantment, but he will know I am at a Charm-protected place and how long I stay there," finished Snape, and he slumped in his chair. He blinked and then sat forward again. "But you can remove it," said Snape confidently. "Can't you?"

Dumbledore regarded Snape, his face inscrutable, as he stroked his beard. A nervous shiver snaked down Snape's spine.

"Well, can't you?" demanded Snape.

"I think, Severus, the question is more: should I?" said Dumbledore.

Snape's jaw slackened in shock.

"We need to consider everything in its totality, Severus. Your safety. The safety of Remus. Your position now and in the future ..."

"My position?" repeated Snape, his voice hollow as a chilling realisation of Dumbledore's priorities settling like a weight in his stomach.

"Think, Severus! How can you keep Remus safe if the Dark Lord knows where you stay and for how long? And if you endanger Remus, you endanger yourself and the Vow you have made to me." Dumbledore stood suddenly as if resolving something for himself.

"We will work a new Fidelius," snapped Snape, but Dumbledore cut him short, speaking slowly and deliberately.

"And who will be your Secret Keeper? Who could resist Voldemort tearing the secret from them? Won't Voldemort require an explanation why you stay away from Hogwarts every night at a secret address? Won't that damage your cover and compromise Remus's safety even more? Think, Severus! Think!"

"Remus must stay here then. He will be safe here. With me." Snape stood, a cold sweat having popped across his body, his body beginning to tremble imperceptibly in apprehension.

"And when I am dead? How will you account for his presence here in your quarters? How would you protect yourself or Remus from Voldemort's wrath if he ever discovered the truth of your bond?" Dumbledore ceased his pacing and turned to Snape, his blue eyes piercing him once more.

"Severus. I must ask even more of you than I ever thought I would." Dumbledore regarded Snape with such pity that Snape felt his blood freeze.

"If you truly love Remus ... you must leave him. It is the only way."
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You Will Not Kiss Me