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Why Draco Should Not Be Using Tampons	By : Padfoot Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 43387 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Title: Why
Draco Should Not Be Using Tampons

Author:
Padfoot the Marauder

Disclaimer: Not
mine. No money. Please don�t sue! Honestly, if I owned the Harry Potter
characters do you think I would keep them occupied by using them in a silly
story as this? If they were all mine, there are one or two I can think of
that would suit much better when strapped to my bedpost, thank you very
much.

Summary: Draco
and Hermione, like all newly appointed Head Boys and �Girls before them, are
assigned to switch bodies for the first week of term to ensure a prosperous
collaboration between them in the future. Will this week turn out to be as
horrible as it sounds? Probably, but you�ll have to read to find out.
HG/DM.

Note: My
Beta is working on this, but it isn�t Beta�d yet. I�m leaving on vacation in 13
days so I had to start posting now or there�d be a 20-day gap between updates.
Once the Beta�d version comes through I�ll put that up.

Prologue:

Saturday


�I HAVE TO WHAT?� Hermione shrieked.


�I�m sorry Miss Granger, but those are the rules: The new Head Boy and Head Girl
are assigned to switch bodies the first week of term� professor McGonagall said
sternly, but her voice was filled with sympathy all the
same.


�How come I�ve never heard of this rule before?� Hermione asked, feeling
somewhat panic-stricken. When she had been summoned to Professor McGonagall�s
office she had naturally assumed it was regarding her new position as Head Girl,
but she had not been expecting that it would concern something like
this.


�It�s kept secret from all other students� McGonagall explained. �The reason of
the body-switch is to ensure a prosperous collaboration between the Head Boy and
Girl in the future. They have to overcome each other�s differences through a
partnership in making the switch go unnoticed for all
others.�


�But...�


�I know it�s not a very alluring prospect to hand over your body to someone else
for any number of times, Miss Granger. But bear in mind that all Head Girls
before you have suffered the same. Trust me; I know from personal experience�
she said, seemingly shuddering at the unpleasant memory.

Hermione
opened her mouth to protest, but didn�t really know what to say. She was at a
loss. Suddenly she found a goblet being pushed into her hands filled with a
somewhat familiar-looking essence.

�It�s
Polyjuice-plus potion� the professor explained. �Drink this tonight before
you go to bed. The switch should be completed by morning and last for seven
days.�


Hermione stared at goblet and then looked at her professor
pleadingly.


�I�m sorry Miss Granger� she said apologetically. �Try to see it as a way in
which you can grow as a person.�

Hermione
suppressed the urge to snort derisively.

�And
remember; you must not tell anyone about the switch. Not even Mister Potter or
Mister Weasley.�

Hermione
nodded in defeat, excused herself and made her way towards her
dorm.

In
her opinion life couldn�t get any worse right now. Not only was she going to
have to switch bodies with a boy, she was going to have to switch with
Malfoy! And both ideas made her really nervous for several reasons, all
of which should be quite obvious. And Malfoy was going to have her body.
Who knows what he would do to it whilst he has it. Her eyes widened at the
thought.

He
was going to see her naked.

While
she was not there.

Getting
a nice view of every single flaw she was embarrassed of... while she was not
there!

�Good
lord, this is a nightmare� she thought as she stepped through the portrait hole
of the common room she shared with Malfoy. At least there was that. If the Head
Boy and Girl didn�t have their private quarters she would have found herself
sharing a dormitory and bathroom with the Slytherin seventh years. Something
Hermione didn�t really find all that appealing.

�You
must be utterly ecstatic, aren�t you Granger?� Malfoy�s familiar voice
drawled.

�Not
really� Hermione answered the sarcastic Slytherin who was lounged back in the
sofa in front of the unlit fireplace. �But I�m sure you�re about to enlighten me
why I should be.�

�Getting
to spend seven days in the body of an actual wizard must be something you
Muggleborns constantly dream about� he said contemptuously. �I hope you didn�t
faint from the sheer honour that was bestowed on you.�

�I
managed� Hermione replied. �I was actually more concerned with the birth defects
I�m probably going to be faced with due to the several generations of inbreeding
your family has been engaging in. Should I be psychologically preparing myself
for an extra head or limb under those robes or is it just a mental deformation
you�re suffering from?�

�How
dare you speak to me like that?� Malfoy drawled as he got up from the sofa and
faced Hermione. �You filthy little��

�Mudblood?�
Hermione finished for him. �I�d watch who you�re calling a Mudblood, Malfoy,
because for the next week; you�ll be one!�

�I�ll
be counting down the minutes� Malfoy spat.

�Likewise�
Hermione replied as she walked past him and headed towards her room. She let out
a frustrated growl as she slammed the door behind her.

The
nerve of that boy! Honestly!

She
sat her steaming goblet at her bedside table and went to get ready for
bed.

��To
ensure a prosperous collaboration between Head Boy and Girl�, my bum!� Hermione
thought grudgingly as she was brushing her teeth. �More likely we�ll kill each
other and they�ll have to assign replacements.�

As
she was done with her pre-sleep preparations and she had dressed herself in her
flannel pyjamas she walked over to her nightstand and picked up the
Polyjuice-plus potion.

�Bottoms
up� she said to herself. Once she had drained the icky substance in one go, she
put the goblet down and got into bed. As she had safely nestled herself under
the sheets she released a sigh of frustration. The next morning she was going to
be waking up as Malfoy. She had always took pity on the poor girls who would
wake up next to him (and if rumours were true; there were a lot), but
waking up as him; that�s just so disconcerting it�s almost
funny.

Almost.

***********

End
of prologue
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Why Draco Should Not Be Using Tampons