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Love Letters	By : JustAbi Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 4797 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1
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All Love Letters are from Draco to Harry.

Chapter One

oOo

I hate you. I
hate the way your hair falls across your face.
I hate the way you walk like your hips are made of something slippery,
no crisp clean economy of motion like a decent human being, just filthy waves
of sex rolling off them every time you move.
It�s disgusting, putting yourself on display like that so everyone can
see exactly what it would be like to fuck you just by watching you walk down
the hallways. Do you want every sex
addled cretin in the school attacking you?

Of course you don�t care. You never care about anything.

You don�t care that you numb my brain, make me clumsy
and awkward, make me lose track of what people are saying to me. It�s some secret plan to make everyone think
I am an incompetent fool. I hate the way
you stare back at me while you talk to your friends like you�re talking to me
all the way across the room. Do you
think I can�t feel your eyes on me? How am I supposed to concentrate when you
look at me like that, like you�ve lost the ability to blink, eyes dilated �til
they look black with just that tease of green around the edges?

And what business do you have being beautiful? You
were never beautiful before. You were
skinny and short and your hair looked like you cut it yourself in the dark and
your clothes never fit and it was easy to tease you because I was better than
you and I knew it. Now you are taller
than me and I hate it. I hate looking up
into your perfect face and watching you suck your lip into your mouth and bite
it until it�s chapped and mangled. Your
lips would be rough under my tongue, not smooth silk like a girl.

I hate the way you tell me you love me when we are
alone and stand too close and touch my face and make my heart race so fast I
feel like I am dying, then act like you don�t even know me when other people
are around. Not that I would willingly
speak to you in public. I couldn�t if I
wanted to. I�d probably vomit or fall
down from sweat-slippery feet and hands.
You make me dizzy and nauseous and angry and empty and I don�t need this
right now.

So just fuck off.
Take your love and shove it up your goddamned perfect arse. Shave your head so the ebony of your unbrushed hair can�t hurt innocent bystanders. Gouge out your eyes so they can�t follow me
every where I go. Cover your skin in
grease and dirt so the milk white can�t blind me. Scream every night until your voice is hoarse
so in the morning I can�t hear the sounds that lick at parts of me no one but
me has ever touched. Take a cold shower
so I can�t feel the heat of your body across the room, or better yet, bathe in
ice.

Stop crying to your friends about how cruel I am, how
I hurt you, how I break your heart with my indifference. They already think I am Voldemort�s
minion. Do you imagine they could loathe
me, or pity you any more than they have always from the beginning? You said you
love me. This is who I am. You don�t have to fuck my friends or turn
them against me to hurt me, shatter me the way you tell everyone who will
listen that I have shattered you. All
you have to do is breathe, exist, love me, and I break into a thousand
pieces. I will never find all of me
again.

Are you happy?

oOo

What the fuck is wrong with you? You wanted to know
how I feel about you and I told you. You
pushed me, and pushed me, and you wouldn�t let it go. So now you won�t even speak to me!? What did
you want me to say? That I love you and I want to skip down the halls holding
hands and braid each other�s hair? I�m not one of your damn goody-goody, touchy
feely friends like the Weasel and the Mudblood.

Have you even met me? Did you think that just because
I let you stick your tongue down my throat just to get you to shut up for ten
seconds I would suddenly turn into a completely different person? If you wanted
someone who would fall all over you and treat you like a god, you should have
tried that shit with C-c-c-reevey. If my father sees that picture you won�t have
to worry about giving me the silent treatment any more because I�ll be buried
behind Malfoy Manor where I can finally get some peace.

oOo

Can�t you just yell at me or something? Tell me you
hate me. Tell me all your friends were
right when they told you my heart was made of ice and I�d never be good for
anything but causing suffering. Cry. Scream.
Hex me. Curse me. Hit me.
Something.
I haven�t heard your voice in weeks.
How am I supposed to live like this? How can you just stare at me with
that, that hollow, defeated look in your eyes and never say a word? When was
the last time you said anything to anyone?

Are you trying to hurt me? Well, it�s working. I feel like someone ripped my heart out of my
chest and left the empty space exposed.
I�d cut it out myself and send it to you wrapped in silver paper in
exchange for the chance to hear you whisper a single word. I�d stand still while you gave me a plague of
boils simply to hear you say the curse.
Please. Hate me �til the day you
die, only hate me out loud.

Or simply forget about me. I�m a stupid wanker. I�m not worth it. Just turn your eyes off when they trip over
me like I�m wrapped in your cloak, invisible, or not even there. If you want to cause me the most pain I can
imagine, do that, and be happy without me and make me watch you move on to
someone better than me.

It was only a kiss.
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Love Letters