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Codename: Creampuff	By : Tigerrr Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Lucius/Hermione Views: 16838 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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****DISCLAIMER****JKR owns anything you recognize

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Azkaban was looking better and better with each passing
moment.� Why he had agreed to this
nonsense (and that was putting it in the mildest possible terms) was anyone�s
guess.� Well, that wasn�t strictly true, but when a wizard has
been subjected to having his happiest memories ripped from his mind each and
every day, he doesn�t really think about negotiating terms when he�s offered a way
out.� Self-preservation instincts kick in
and make one agreeable to just about anything.�
Still, he could have kicked himself � along with a few other people �
once the euphoria of freedom had worn off and reality had intruded�which had
been remarkably swift once the Wizarding Oath had tightened down on him, along
with that�.that�spell.�

Now here he was in the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix with
schoolchildren, Aurors, and countless Weasleys (how
many of them were there?) staring at
him while Dumbledore introduced him.� He
fumed as he was awarded a name that made him long to hex the old bastard into
oblivion once his former Headmaster trotted out the nickname that they were
urged to use.�

If his father were here, he�d be disowned on the spot.

Lucius Malfoy stared down his nose at the nearest ginger
haired mongrel � it was one of those he had seen all those years back at
Flourish & Blotts, he was sure�but who knew for
certain?� Molly Weasley
was a veritable child factory; turn your back on her for five seconds and out
came yet another one.� His eyes touched
on each witch and wizard present � over there was Arthur Weasley,
to the left was Remus Lupin
gossiping with�was that Kingsley Shacklebolt?� He ran his gaze over the others, filing their
names in his head until his eyes arrived at that meddlesome boy, Harry
Potter.� His lip curled at the very
thought of spending time with the arrogant, impertinent snot, and was on the
verge of coming out with something quite insulting when he suddenly realized
the reason all the younger wizards were looking at him strangely.� Fantastic.� Not only would he be forced to fraternize
with this band of rabble, but he would have to endure stares such as this the
entire time; this realization opened up an entirely new level of loathing for
the man who�d done this to him and he inhaled deeply to keep from testing out
whether or not he could cast the Killing Curse wandlessly.

Unfortunately all this accomplished was a more pronounced
eye-bulging on the ones who had their eyes on him and Lucius hastily exhaled,
glowering fiercely while Albus� eyes twinkled merrily. He had hated seeing that
twinkle ever since he was a first year, and seeing it focused upon him now only
served to make him long to smother the old man with his own beard.� Now,
now, Lucius � such a look will only leave unattractive lines in your face, and
serve to age you before your time.� You
were once as young as they are now, don�t forget, came
the voice inside his mind.�

He hated it when Dumbledore invaded his thoughts like that
despite all his efforts to keep him out.�
It�s exceptionally rude to
initiate a conversation in such a fashion, Dumbledore � stay out of my head!
You�ve done enough damage today as it is.�
I expect you think I shall be grateful to you for my current situation
even though, as usual, you have meddled with events enough to make me rue the
very day I was born, he shot back angrily.�
Why did things of this sort have to happen to him?� Molly Weasley came
to fuss over him and he allowed her to guide him into the kitchen where she
plied him with tea that was most likely from a teabag and a scone that he was certain had seen better days,
despite her assurances that she had baked it first thing that morning.� Well, whatever century it had been baked in
was much more recent than the sludge he had been served in Azkaban, so he took
it with a mutter that she could interpret as thanks if she so chose.� Immersed as he was in his loathing for his
situation and the resentment always at a slow simmer in the back of his mind,
he barely tasted what he ate and drank but vaguely registered that it wasn�t as
bad as he had thought it would be.��

It was really too bad that he couldn�t ignore the looks and
comments he was receiving from the witches who had crowded through the doorway
to have a look at their newest member.� I�ll show them what a real member looks like, he thought to himself sourly as Hestia
Jones exclaimed loudly what beautiful hair he possessed, and demanded to know
the name of his hairdresser.� Lucius took
another mouthful of tea to avoid answering as the kitchen resounded with
compliments on his complexion and eyes, which were doing their dead level best
not to roll up to the ceiling in disgust.�
At length he escaped under the excuse that he really did have to use the facilities before
�something unfortunate� happened.� Which
was absolutely true � if he had to endure another second of their company, he
would bludgeon himself to death with the salt cellar.�

Barricading himself in the bathroom, Lucius slumped against
the peeling wallpaper before jerking upright when he suddenly realized the
state of decay the wall was in � what if mildew got into his hair? Not to
mention his clothes, never mind the
fact that his prison uniform had been in contact with much worse
environments�his clothing had been Transfigured right along with�other things
when Dumbledore had tricked him with that spell.� He ground his teeth as he stared in the
mirror at his reflection, still unable to believe what had happened. He knew he
should be grateful to have escaped from Azkaban, the sense of overwhelming
hopelessness�but just now he couldn�t summon up a single charitable
thought.� When he had been incarcerated,
Narcissa had only come to visit him only once � and that was to serve him the divorce
papers.� For all he knew, she had
traipsed off to the Caribbean with her lawyer
and was openly taking lovers left and right, flaunting her newly single
status.� She could take as many lovers as
she pleased; he didn�t mind that one bit since he had only summoned her to his
bed the night of their wedding � but she seemed hell bent on publicly
embarrassing him.

If Narcissa were here now, she might well laugh herself sick
at the very sight of him and then take out a full-page ad in The Daily Prophet just to tell him that
it served him right.� She had never
gotten over the insult he had dealt by refusing to fall in love with her�oh,
she never suffered a lack of male company and would never in a million years
actually dream of loving him, but it
had always rankled that there was at least one wizard who could refuse her
charms.� He had steadfastly assured her
that her singular charms had been worn out when she was a fifth year at
Hogwarts, thus they had no hold over him and why they
should ensnare any other wizards, he would never know.� It was a miracle that Draco had even been
produced in the first place, though both parties involved in the conception
knew perfectly well that this particular miracle had only one name: Ogdens.� Lucius had paid through the nose for the
strongest fertility potion known to man, and had mixed it with the largest
bottle of Ogden�s
Finest Firewhiskey he could get his hands on.

Draco.� He wondered
what the boy was doing at this very moment, and then dismissed the
uncharacteristic thought from his mind.�
Lucius had never acted particularly paternal towards his son, that much
was the truth�if only the boy had been born of another mother,
things might have been equally as different.�
Whenever Lucius Malfoy looked upon his son, he simply saw Narcissa
staring back at him and could not summon up a single warm feeling for his
offspring.� Draco was simply a living
reminder of the price he had been forced to pay for simply belonging to the
Malfoy dynasty, all part of the family pattern of having one�s marriage
arranged and executed at a young age�whether or not the couple in question
approved of the match made for them. He and Narcissa had detested each other on
sight. Lucius� lip curled once more at this unwelcome reminiscence, but he was
brought back to reality by the sound of voices outside of the bathroom door.� He turned on the faucet so he wouldn�t have
to listen to two of the Aurors and a random Weasley
discussing him, and bent to splash water in his face.

Straightening, he returned to surveying his reflection in
the mirror � despite the fact that he was still furious with Dumbledore for
doing this to him, he had to admit the meddlesome old fool had done a good
job.� He would certainly need to iron out
the details with the Headmaster and make sure it wasn�t permanent, but he was
beginning to feel the slightest bit of satisfaction that he was here among a
group of witches and wizards who had no clue as to who he really was.� His hair was the same, as were his eyes�but that was where the resemblance to his real self
ended.� He was shorter.� He was slimmer.� He had breasts and an absurd nickname.� Lucius Malfoy had been transformed into a
woman named Luciana Marie (Lucy for short, wasn�t it adorable?), and was not
relishing the experience one bit.

He flipped his waist-length blond hair over one shoulder,
cast a despairing glance down the length of his altered body, and sighed as he
opened the door�coming face to face with the one person he would have gladly
avoided for the rest of his life, Alastor �Mad Eye�
Moody.� Lucius silently cursed his
ill-luck as the grizzled Auror�s magical eye spun
wildly in its socket and waited for the other man to loudly announce the
presence of a known Death Eater in the very place he should have never been
allowed to stand. To his surprise, however, no such thing occurred � Moody
simply stared, then let out a guffaw and stumped off towards the stairs.� Most
likely conjuring up a blackmail scenario, Lucius thought darkly as he made
his unwilling way back to the hormonally charged stares of the entire Weasley clan.�

Dumbledore motioned him over when he returned to the living
area, and he sighed when he saw that his former teacher was standing with none
other than Severus Snape.� Of course he would have to bring his friend
into this mess, but Lucius had been aware for some time that Severus was a spy
for the Order.� Neither of them had any
love for Voldemort, but Lucius was �in it up to his ears,� as some of those
Muggles called it, on account of the follies of his father.� By the time Luka�
Malfoy had died and Lucius had taken control of the family�s fortune, it was
already greatly reduced � his father had pledged most of their assets as well
as his heir�s loyalty to the madman.� He
often wondered what the old man would have done if he had known that Lord Voldemort�s blood was of a lesser quality than his own, and
that he was simply Tom Marvolo Riddle, an orphaned
Half Blood.�

Now he looked up into the dark eyes of his friend, wondering
what had made the younger man turn from Voldemort.� �Severus, my boy,� Dumbledore began, �Have
you met our newest member yet?� This is
Luciana.�� He pronounced it �Lu-chi-ah-na.��

The tall wizard gave him a bored glance and inclined his
head slightly, �A pleasure, I�m sure-�

Lucius had the satisfaction of seeing Severus� eyes widen as
he recognized him.� �Severus,� he said
coolly.� He folded his hands over his
chest reflexively as his friend looked him over slowly.� �Didn�t anyone ever tell you that it�s not
polite to stare at a lady?�

The corners of his Housemate�s mouth began to twitch.� �When I do
see one, I shall endeavor to behave myself.��
Lucius glared at him as Dumbledore coughed and moved away to make
another announcement.� The two friends
stared at each other until Severus blinked.�
�Did you hear that?�

�Hear what? And
you can peel your eyes from my chest � I�m not letting you touch anything,�
Lucius warned, but he turned to see what the newest uproar was about this time.�

He was just in time to hear the words, �� with
Hermione.�� What were they banging on
about now?� A young woman who he didn�t
recall seeing before got to her feet from a huge armchair and began to walk
over to him.� Hermione, Hermione�where
had he heard that name before?� He
inspected the witch making her way around the others:� nice figure, not very tall, nice figure,
brown hair in long spiraling curls, nice figure, brown
eyes.� Nice figure.� His eyes lingered appreciatively on her � it
had been a cold, lonely time in Azkaban and he was more than ready to indulge
himself with a lovely young witch who was�a
Mudblood, his mind finally supplied as she
reached him, stuck out her hand, and introduced herself as Hermione
Granger.� He stared at her extended hand
(did she truly think he would touch
it?) until her smile faltered slightly and she withdrew the offending
hand.� �Um, Professor Dumbledore says
you�re to stay with me at my flat�Lucy,� she said hesitantly.

Hearing that ridiculous nickname coming from her lips was
almost more than he could bear and he opened his mouth to tell her exactly what
she could do with the things Professor
Dumbledore said when Severus stepped in and elevated himself to target
status.� �Please forgive Lucy, Miss Granger � she has had a bad day, perhaps she is getting near her cycle.� She has always been volatile and
unfriendly near her time of the month,
so pay no attention.� I�m sure she just needs a nap.� Why don�t you and Lucy Floo over and get settled in?�

Lucius had been swelling with fury at each successive word
and with the second repetition of that
name began digging in his clothing wildly, searching for his wand.� His friend merely smirked and walked away
when no wand was found, and Lucius slouched angrily after the Muggle Born witch
when she gestured toward the fireplace.�
Damn it all to hell!� Why did these things have to happen to him?� Hermione Granger daintily tossed a pinch
of Floo powder into the fire and disappeared.�

Out of pure spite, Lucius threw the entire container of powder
into the flames and followed.

TBC�

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Codename: Creampuff