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Darkest Desires	By : Lupinswolfie Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Remus/Hermione Views: 24276 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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AN:Written for a challenge at GrangerEnchanted (and reposted here due to the italics not working the first few chapters!).

As usual for my fics---if you see them, they didn't die. I've taken what I wanted from the books and left the rest alone!

All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

I'm considering turning this into a Moony series, so please don't use my Moony/Remus relationship---respect that the idea was mine originally and don't steal it (without permission). I'm going for several original things in this fic, so don't take them!

Special thanks to lilmisblack for being my sounding board. She tells me when something is crap and keeps me on track! hugs and kisses...I luv you!!! And to Lady Lynn for beta'ing this for me!

(This AN was copied from GE, so it might be a bit different than what was up originally!)

ENJOY!!!

Night came quickly to number twelve, Grimmauld Place and the occupants were quietly settled into their rooms. Remus, however, had been tossing and turning for several hours; a burning sensation flowing through his body that he couldn�t stop, nor could he explain.
�Remus, love, is there some reason you can�t be still? I have to work tomorrow, remember?�
�Sorry, Dora,� he whispered quietly, �rough night.�
He slowly sat up, swinging his bare legs off the bed and searching for his pajama bottoms in the dark. �I think I�ll go to the kitchen,� he said.
�Mmm? Okay,� came her sleepy reply.
Smiling at his sleeping wife and gently caressing her cheek, Remus slid his pants up his naked thighs and tied them loosely at his waist before heading downstairs to the comforts of chocolate. As he padded down the stairs, he sniffed the air around him, then eagerly sniffed a little harder. It had to be her, he mused. Only Hermione could fix hot chocolate that made his mouth water like Pavlov�s dogs at the mere thought. He had tried several times to get the secret recipe from her, but she remained tight-lipped, refusing to tell him how because she thought he�d make himself sick by drinking too much. Of course, she was probably right. It wouldn�t do for him to founder himself on the delectable drink and then miss their nighttime conversations that he had come to crave in a house full of Quidditch-talking Aurors.
Her back was turned towards him as she slowly poured two cups of steaming, brown liquid into the large mugs. Trying to get the best of her, he quietly snuck into the kitchen and crept up behind her�closer and closer, wanting to grab her and make her squeal in surprise.
�Hello, Remus,� she said, the smile on her face transferred to her voice as well.
�Damn,� he muttered, �how did you know?�
She turned around to face him, handing him his drink while her smile slowly slid off her face and was replaced with a confused look. �I don�t really know, to be honest. I just knew you were there, that�s all. And you never can resist my hot chocolate.�
�Strange, but this is you we�re talking about,� he grinned down at her when she suddenly glared at him. Her curls were put up in a messy ponytail and her face was fresh and devoid of makeup, making her look more beautiful than he�d ever seen her before. Unsure where exactly that thought came from, he decided to change the subject all together. �Marshmallows?� he pouted.
�I forgot!� she squeaked, turning quickly to the cabinet and reaching for the bag of sugary goodness. �Okay,� she murmured, reaching up further and exposing her bare waist to his prying eyes, �who the hell moved my marshmallows?�
He walked up behind her, reaching across her body and into the cabinet. When his fingers skimmed across the bag, his body pressed into hers and a jolt of lightening soared through him. She must have felt it as well, he thought, because she gasped and then held herself stiff until he moved his hand.
�Thank you,� she stammered quietly, a light blush staining her cheeks as she turned around to face him.
The bag was held out in front of him, awaiting her acceptance, but his body refused to move back the appropriate distance. Her trembling hand reached out for the bag, but as her fingers grazed his own, he felt drawn to her. Their eyes locked and their breathing became raspier, but their hands never moved from each other and she was trapped between his hard, half naked body and the counter.
Her breasts heaved against the tight tank top and her body felt as though it were on fire. Remus was looking at her like he never had before; lust and desire swimming in his otherwise calm blue eyes, while flecks of amber that she had never seen before flashed through them. Her body reacted of its own accord and she leaned closer to him, her mind frantically protesting the actions, but the signal was lost along its way to her feet. She knew the moment they would kiss, saw his eyes dart to her lips only seconds before he leaned down and claimed them with his own. A soft brush of his lips against hers at first, a whisper of a kiss, until she mewed with pleasure and need and he dropped his hands to her waist, pulling her flush against his body and forcefully claiming her mouth as the marshmallows fell to the floor unnoticed.
Remus� mind was reeling with guilt as his tongue fought with hers and he pulled her even closer. A thousand reasons why this was wrong and why he had to stop were flying in front of his closed eyelids, but none as prevalent as the thought of his wife lying in their bed upstairs. He knew that if anyone in the house walked in on them, there would be hell to pay and then some, but when the witch in his arms splayed her hands across his bare chest and he tasted the chocolate within her mouth, he also knew he was lost. Something about the entire encounter didn�t feel right to him, something was off that he couldn�t explain, and when the growl rumbled from deep within his chest, he broke away suddenly.
�Hermione, I�m��
He was interrupted by a loud bang at the door, allowing them both the excuse they wanted not to talk about what had just happened.
�Dammit all to hell,� they heard a muffled voice bark in anger, followed by another loud bang.
�Who could that be this time of night?� Hermione asked, unconsciously taking Remus� hand and following him to the door. Her body was hidden behind his and she peeked out around his shoulder.
�Remus! Harry! Someone get yer arse down here and let me in my own fucking house!�
They shared a look of shock before she slowly moved out from around Remus, shaking her head and smiling slightly. When she opened the door, she had to rush forward quickly to catch the falling man before her. Remus was only half a second behind her, catching them both and helping to steady them.
�Honestly, Sirius,� Remus sighed, heaving the drunken man to his feet and dragging him to the sofa, �you�ve not been back two weeks and you�re already getting drunk and looking for women?�
Sirius looked between them, eyes still blurry from intoxication. �So, did you two finally hook up, then?� he slurred then fell backwards onto the sofa.
�No, we did not hook up,� Hermione ground out, before walking over to him and assessing the damage. His left eye was starting to bruise and a deep cut ran along his otherwise perfect forehead. �Now, what did you get yourself into this time?�
�Tain�t my fault,� he slurred again. �How was I supposed to know the bird was married? Or that her husband was only slightly smaller than a troll?�
Hermione stifled her giggles and almost lost control when she saw Remus doing the same. Summoning her first aid kit, she quickly laid out the few supplies she would need.
�The ring usually gives it away,� Remus chided, picking Sirius� legs up and laying him out on the couch. He bent over his friend, still grinning, to look at his cut.
�Sorry, Moony, but I ain�t that kinda guy,� Sirius laughed as he looked at his friend�s unhappy face.
Remus rolled his eyes and waved his left hand. �And I�m spoken for, mate, so you�re out of luck,� he said; looking over at Hermione, he added, �If you�re alright with this bum, I�ll go down and get our hot chocolate.�
�Yea, we�re fine,� she muttered, already waving her wand over his eye and watching as the blue faded to yellow instantly while Remus closed the door behind himself.
�I still don�t know what the fuck Moony was thinking,� Sirius said clearly, surprising Hermione with the sudden change in his demeanor.
�Er, what do you mean?�
Sirius snorted loudly. �Marrying my little cousin. Fucking twat. You know they only pretend to be happy together. Hell, I could see it from the first day I came back.�
�He seems happy enough,� she replied, gently cleaning away the dried blood from his wound.
�Happy? Have you actually seen them together?� She ignored his drunken rant and poured antiseptic onto a cloth. �And I thought the veil was bad,� he scoffed.
She looked at him for a moment, analyzing his words before speaking. �The veil? You said you couldn�t remember anything about the veil, Sirius,� she said softly.
�It was dark, Hermione,� he murmured suddenly, completely catching her attention. His blue eyes bored into hers and she knew he wasn�t nearly as drunk now as he had let on before; words came from him that she hadn�t dared dream of hearing and they ripped at her very heart. �I could hear voices all around me,� he continued, haunted by the sounds even weeks after his return.
�Voices?� she asked softly, her fingers gently working to clean his cut before she would heal it.
�I heard them constantly. Other people were in there, it wasn�t just me.�
Hermione�s hand stilled over his cut, shaking at his revelation. �You weren�t alone?�
�Very alone,� he whispered, taking hold of her wrist and pulling her hand into his own. The action seemed to anchor him, allowing him to continue talking to her; revealing things to her that no one had ever heard before. �There were voices all around me and yet I was more alone than ever before.� His voice hitched slightly. �It was frightening, Hermione, and I was scared.�
All thoughts of healing him forgotten, Hermione shared his pain and willed him to continue as she gripped his hand tightly in her own. �What did you hear?�
�Words, phrases. Sometimes I would swear I heard people I knew and other times I couldn�t tell one voice from the next.� He looked as though he expected her to laugh at him, but he knew she never would. �It was strange, odd really, but I heard Rufus�s voice, at least I think it was him, saying that it was pointless for the Unspeakables to waste their time on the veil when there was a war going on around them.
�Hot chocolate?� Remus called from the door.
Hermione tore her eyes from Sirius�, both wishing the moment hadn�t ended. Sirius because for the first time he felt relieved of a huge burden, Hermione because she felt robbed of a knowledge only Sirius could give her and knew he�d never speak of it again.
�Don�t mind if I do,� Sirius replied, cocking an eyebrow at Remus who became suddenly uneasy looking at the marshmallows sitting in front of him that Hermione had Summoned.

�So, no longer inebriated, my friend?� Remus asked, more to distract himself than anything else.
�You know me, Moony, always could handle my liquor. It�s just overlarge Muggle fists I have problems with.�
They both laughed, but Hermione rolled her eyes at their antics.
�Come now, love,� Sirius goaded. �Don�t tell me that in all those years I was gone, no one ever took you to a club.� When she attempted to ignore him, he grinned. �So, tell me, you and Harry aren�t together, and I doubt very seriously Ron would have taken you,� he said with a slightly disgusted look on his face. �So, who?�
�Wrong Weasley,� Remus smirked, earning himself a kick in the shin by Hermione.
The mischievousness was obvious in Sirius� smirk when he asked, �Really?�

�Oh, yes,� Remus continued, a smile breaking out that he couldn�t help even though he felt the wolf become restless for no apparent reason. �It appears that our sweet, innocent Hermione has had a thing for twins.�
�What?!� Hermione asked in surprise. �How did you�no one was supposed to��
Sirius spit his drink all over the table and stared at Hermione in shock and what appeared to be pride. �Fred and George? You? You, Fred, and George?� he stammered, making them both laugh at him.

�Not any longer.� She sighed dramatically, giving in to the inevitable, �But it was so good while it lasted.�

Sirius exploded in laughter and neither noticed the strained look that momentarily crossed Remus� face. Anger coursed through him without cause. It had been like this for almost a year now. His transformations had been much more difficult, even with the Wolfsbane Potion Hermione made for him, and it was starting to take its toll on the man. He had been fighting Moony from within and no one around him was the wiser about his situation. The wolf wanted to come out when the moon wasn�t full and Remus had no idea why. He did notice, however, that things seemed worse around Hermione and he had no explanations for that, either. Perhaps his wolf had a very strong dislike for the young girl and was angry whenever she was around?

�You know, I honestly always thought Harry would end up with young Ginny,� Sirius said nonchalantly.

Hermione gave a rather unladylike snort and scratched her ring finger which had suddenly begun tingling. �They tried, and failed miserably. It would appear that dear Ginny wanted The Boy Who Lived and not Harry. So, he started dating Daphne Greengrass. You met her once before and we all rather like her.�

�Funny!� Sirius grinned, �he takes after me there. Tall, blond and gorgeous--just the way I like them!�

�I expect she�ll be moving in soon enough,� Remus said with a pleased smile. �She�s nice and keeps his head out of his arse when the fame starts to get to him. They�re a good match.�

�Well, I think I need a shower. Care to join me, love?�
Hermione rolled her eyes and shook her head. Sirius had started harmlessly flirting with her almost the day he came back. Since then, they had fallen into a camaraderie that both were beginning to cherish.

Remus watched Sirius leave and realized he was once again alone with Hermione. He had been avoiding this for the last several hours, unsure exactly what to say or do after he had kissed her. When he looked at her face, he saw she was staring intently at his own.
�Remus, don�t look so worried,� she said softly as she scratched her finger once more. �We�ll just forget that it happened and not even think about it, alright?�
�Yea, okay. I really am sorry about that. Gods, Tonks is going to kill me!�
�Only if you tell her. And I don�t think you�re really foolish enough to do that. You and I were the only ones down there and so we�re the only ones that know what happened. It�s our secret to forget.�
He looked up at her strangely for a moment, wondering if he really could keep something like this from his wife, before nodding his head in agreement. �Thank you, for being so�well, you.�
She laughed softly and patted him on the shoulder. �You�re quite welcome. Now go back to bed with your wife while I clean up here. You know,� she said, testing the waters, �it really is amazing that Sirius is back, don�t you think?�
�Astonishing.�
�I wonder if�well, it stands to reason that if Sirius could come back�I mean, perhaps maybe.�
�Hermione, what exactly are you thinking?� Remus asked curiously, although he had an idea where she was going with her ramblings.
�I wonder if it�s possible that others could come back as well,� she said in a rush.
�You can�t tell anyone about this, Hermione,� he said warily. �It wouldn�t do to get their hopes up only to have them dashed later.�
�I wouldn�t dream of doing such a thing, Remus,� she said irritably. �But I think it may be possible.� She grinned over at him then, �Would you help me?�
Remus sighed, then laughed and nodded, knowing he couldn�t resist a request from her. �There�s no changing your mind when you set it to something. I�ll help in any way I can as long as Harry and Sirius don�t find out. It would devastate them to get their hopes up and it not work.�
She watched as he left the room, silently cursing herself for asking for his help. She knew if anyone could help her the way she might need, it would be him, but she�d also have to work closely with him while the feelings of that kiss continued to pulse throughout her body. How was she going to do this? How was she going to work with Remus, someone else�s husband for Merlin�s sake, and hide the urges that she so desperately wanted to act on? And most importantly, why was she suddenly having these uncontrollable urges where Remus was concerned? And what the hell was wrong with her damned finger?!
~ ~ ~***~ ~ ~
�You really believe this, don�t you, Remus?� Hermione asked with a smile.
They had been working in the library all afternoon, fueled by the tiniest glimpse of possibility in one of Sirius� old books. The book talked about wands and curses and then went into great detail about what was �real and finite� and what was not. Remus had jumped on it, excited and motivated by the thoughts of seeing those he loved returned to him, but Hermione remained somewhat skeptical.
�Of course I do! If Sirius can come back, then I now firmly believe that anything is possible, especially with your brain and attention to detail.�
�And don�t underestimate your own knowledge. I�m just glad neither one of us has to work this week.�
�Well, as the boss, I do have some say over when I take time off, and Sirius� return was a valid enough reason. No matter how long ago it was,� he added with a smirk.
�I suppose so. However, you may head the Department of Magical Creature Research, but I am still a peon. A peon who is very lucky to have such an understanding boss.�
�Yes,� he replied sarcastically, �it must be rather difficult to have the bloody Minister of Magic think of you as a daughter. You�ve got him wrapped around your finger and you know it,� he teased.
She grinned at him knowingly. �Yes, it really is so hard on me,� she said airily.

He threw a pillow at her from the couch and she ducked it, laughing at his antics and marveling at the change in his features when he smiled so freely. He had been distant with her for quite awhile now, only spending short periods of time alone with her and always leaving with a strained face. She would have thought it was the kiss they shared two nights ago, but he�d been doing this for months�and months. Being able to talk with him these last two days had been more than nice. It was only her long-time attraction that she now had to keep hidden.
�But Kings knows my research has proven invaluable in the past and might do so again.�
�Hopefully he�ll get Sirius cleared of all charges today and allow him to walk around as a free man again,� Remus said, dragging her from her thoughts and to the meeting Sirius was attending while they were locked in the library doing research on lost souls.
�I�m sure he will, now that the shock has worn off. People really couldn�t believe that their own Minister was hiding Sirius� location all those years ago.�
�But he has the sympathy vote, people love Sirius immediately, they always have.�
�Yes, and it helps he�s easy on the eyes. Did you see all those young witches swooning over him when we left?� she laughed.
Remus felt his chest constrict slightly. Dammit, not again! he thought to himself. He had been rather surprised, and more than a little pleased, that the wolf had calmed down enough to allow him to do this research with Hermione. Now it appeared that the reprieve was over and the wolf was not happy once again. �You have to let me do this,� he told the wolf sternly. �If anyone can bring James and Lily back, it�s Hermione. No matter what you feel about the woman, she�s our only hope.�
�You have no idea how I feel about anything, human!� the wolf spat in disgust. �Finish your little study session first, but I don�t wish to listen to her gloat about her men friends.�
�She�s not gloating. Now, calm yourself and allow me to work with her.�
�Gladly,� he replied and Remus swore he heard a smirk in the wolf�s gravelly voice.
�Remus,� her sweet voice broke in, �are you okay?�
�Is something wrong with Remus?�
�What?� he asked confusedly, smiling at his wife when she walked over to him from the door. �Nothing�s wrong with me, love.�
�No, Tonks, he�s fine. I guess we�ve been working a bit too hard today, he kind of spaced out on me.�
�Yeah, sorry about that. Glad you�re home, Dora. How was work?�
�Not bad,� she said offhandedly while taking a seat on his lap and kissing him thoroughly.
Hermione bit down on the small amount of jealousy she felt. So what if the last time a man made her feel all warm and fuzzy was six months ago when Blaise and she last made love? Blaise had been brilliant, but there was something not quite right in their relationship and they both had come to mutually realize it. However, Remus and Tonks were starting to make her nauseous, so she got up to retrieve yet another book.
�I�ll call you when supper is ready. Will you be finished soon? I want a little time with you,� Tonks pouted.
He smiled at her and brushed her cheek, saying softly, �We�ll be finished soon, I promise. Then I�m all yours.�
Hermione heard her girlish giggle and steeled herself against the rising bile in her throat. Who was she to deny anyone what she wished she had? When the door closed behind Tonks, Hermione grabbed the book she was looking for and turned to head back to the couch. As soon as she turned around, she found herself closely facing Remus. She gasped in surprise and tried not to notice the way the top three buttons of his untucked shirt were still undone, or how the sparse hairs were begging to be touched. Her eyes drifted upwards, taking in the throbbing vein in his neck, his chiseled jaw line, and his soft, demanding lips.
Before she realized what he was doing, he had her pushed against the bookshelf and himself settled between her now spread legs, the book falling to the floor. His hands gripped her hips with bruising strength as she wiggled against him.
�R�Remus, what are you doing?� she hissed, hating the way her body was already reacting to his.
A mirthless chuckle met her words, followed by a voice that she didn�t recognize, a voice that sounds raspy and gravelly and sent waves of heat throughout her body. �The human is currently trying to fight his way out of the prison he keeps me locked in,� he said, lowering his mouth to her ear and sucking her earlobe lightly between his teeth, drawing a whimper from her lips.
�I�I don�t understand,� she stammered.
�Of course you do. You�re an intelligent witch,� he said, pulling away from her and allowing her to look into his amber eyes.
Her look of shock was quickly replaced by a look of understanding and she relaxed slowly, still wary and cautious, but not nearly as upset as before. Somewhere in the deep recesses of her mind, she had known this was possible all along. �Moony,� she said softly.
He lowered his mouth to her neck, lightly nipping and kissing her exposed vein as she leaned her head against the bookshelf and moaned softly. �A very, very intelligent witch,� he murmured in between kisses to her tender flesh. �You see, he has been fighting me nearly all his life. We grew up together, the human and I, so one would think he would be a little more understanding of our needs.�
One of the hands resting on her hips slowly started to move upwards as he spoke against her neck and sent shivers along her body. The other remained on her hip, holding her in place, while he roamed up her side to gently cup her breast. The moan fell from her lips unconsciously and she arched her body into his hand.
�I don�t understand,� she whimpered with her eyes closed, but her own hands came to rest on his chest. �Why are you doing this? What are you doing?�
�It�s quite simple, witch. The human has mated with a woman in which I do not approve. I had warned him that she was not our mate, but he refused to listen to me�to reason. Now we have a problem.�
�Y�you do?� she asked, melting into his arms as his raspy voice washed over her in ways she had never imagined possible and the bookshelf dug into her back.
�Yes, we do. You see, Hermione,� he growled, sending more shivers along her spine when he said her name, �a wolf chooses his mate and it is truly a rare find. Many wolves go their entire lives without finding the one they are meant to be with; whereas I find that mine has been here all this time, right under my very nose.�
�Certainly you don�t mean me!� she gasped, wishing her voice sounded stronger and more confident. But, how often was it that one was approached by a werewolf, the actual wolf, and spoken to in such a way while the hands and lips of the man himself did the most glorious things to her body.
�Yes, you,� he whispered, pushing into her even closer with his body so that she could feel his arousal.
�How do you know? Remus is married!�
�The human kissed you, did he not?� His lips turned up slightly in a wolfish grin as she stared into his eyes. �Granted, I gave him a push in that direction, but it was he who kissed you first, not me. It was both of us, however, that felt the reaction. I had my suspicions for many months, but I knew in that second who you were, what you were meant to be, but the human refuses to see it. His pathetic thoughts were of his own mate, the one that doesn�t belong.�
�Remus is not pathetic and I think you�re crazy,� she said, trying to push him away as reality and fear slowly seeped in.
He slammed her against the bookshelf once more, pinning her hands above her head with one hand as the other grabbed her face and turned it to him and his hips held her own in place. Her breath hitched and her eyes welled with tears. �Do not fear me, witch, for I will not hurt you, but do not test me either. I am not known for my tolerance. If you don�t believe what I say is true,� he snarled, �then ask the human who has been fighting with me for almost a year now, ever since his insufferable wedding when he forced that woman on me.�
�You?� she asked in shock. Her heart was racing, but she could feel his beating steadily in his chest and before she realized it, hers began beating at the same rhythm. �You�re the reason his transformations have been so much worse, why he looks more tired and worn than ever?�
�Yes, of course. I have allowed him to do as he pleases for far too long. It is time that I started taking more control where our livelihood is concerned.�
He pressed his body harder into hers and she moaned softly at the touch. �We can�t do this. Remus will be so mad at me and he�ll never speak to me again. Please just leave him alone, let him be happy. He deserves to be happy,� she pleaded.
�And what of me, mate? Do I not deserve happiness? Would having us both fall in love with the same woman not make us both happy?� he rasped, nuzzling her neck and lightly nipping at her throbbing vein.
�Both? Remus is in love with Tonks. He�d never even look at me that way!�
Moony growled suddenly. �This is my only warning, mate. I will have you, whether the human likes it or not. You will give in to me because we are destined to be together and you�ll find you can�t deny me. What he chooses to do while I�m dormant is his own decision.�
�It doesn�t work like that! He�ll know and he�ll hate me for it. Everyone will know!� she spat, angry with herself because she knew he was right, there was simply no way she could resist his future advances if they were anything like today�s. Even if her mind refused, her body already hungered for him like it had for no other.
�It does now,� he snarled, cupping her chin tighter in his hand. �He will not know what I do with you, only that I am more content and so will he be in return. If it is your desire that the other humans not know about us, that is fine�but I will have you.� He kissed her fiercely, sending all the blood rushing to her center and leaving her lightheaded and hot. �You belong to me.�
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Darkest Desires