Hold Me Now | By : starstruck86 Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Ron Views: 3680 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor do I make any money from these writings. |
A/N: I’m back again. This fic turned out bigger and different to how I wanted but
it’s set me up nicely for the next two planned (Merlin help me!). This is a
follow on to all my other RW/SS work, not really necessary for the rest to be
read first. But this somehow ended up containing smut, angst, arguing, fluff,
plot points and an overall feeling of cheesy 80s feel good movies (hence the
title and song lyrics at the end!).
Thanks to all my reviewers, as
usual, I hope you like this next fic. I may not get the
most reviews in the world but those of you who do take the time, rock my world.
I tried to make this mostly about them, as I’m well aware the last few have
been filled with other characters, so I went back to base about R/S and their
life together. It was meant to be a
relaxed fic. About ten pages of MS word, I planned. *collapses*
Starstruck86 xxx
***
Severus
braced himself against the kitchen sink, looking determinedly out of the large
window out towards the coast. He focussed on the sea as much as he could,
although the fading light was robbing it from his view. His fingers tapped
nervously on the huge porcelain rectangle which he’d just finished washing up
in.
The only
other sound in the room was a clock ticking as the seconds slipped by, taking with
them the darkness and presenting a new worry for every annoying movement the
hands made. Severus chewed the inside of his cheek and firmly concentrated on
looking out at the view.
Behind him
in the kitchen sat a meal long since laid out, one that should have been eaten
and a quarter-way to digested by that point. But it
was merely cold, un-eaten, and Severus was still alone, glaring at the
landscape as if it were it’s own fault that his husband was firstly, missing;
secondly, late, and thirdly both of
those things on their anniversary.
Not their
wedding anniversary, but their official, ‘first night we kissed and spent the
night in each other’s arms’ May anniversary. Severus had admitted before that
was the one he liked best. Ron had respectfully disagreed and so they decided
they should celebrate both, if each occasion meant more to the other separately.
Ron wasn’t complaining -it got them two nice meals, and two sex-a-thons, and
two nights where the world, ever nosy, buggered off and left them alone. Severus
echoed the sentiments completely.
Except for the fact that he
was now alone, on his favourite night of the year.
You’d better have a fucking good
excuse for being this late, Weasley.
He closed
his eyes and tilted his head back to the room, willing himself to remain calm. He
breathed in and out purposefully, trying not to let the anxiety consume him.
Severus had never considered himself to have any issues with anxiety at all, up
until he’d started loving Ronald Weasley. But with that love came a possessive
fire in his blood, which he was totally used to, and then the overwhelming fear
of his new love being taken from him, which he was again no stranger to, but
never to the extent that he was currently feeling.
The fear
was peaked by the fact that Ron was out on his infernal inherited-from-Sirius-Fucking-Black-death-trap, as Severus
liked to refer to the old motorbike. Ron had finally gotten up the nerve to
take the muggle test in March, near his birthday, and passed it the first time.
A slight smile sprung to Severus’ lips as he thought of the nervous, shaking
bag of bones that his husband had resembled as he’d walked out of the door to
attend his test. It was a miracle he’d stayed upright, let alone been able to
pass with flying colours –though of course, Severus was never as tactless as to
say as such.
But the
motorbike was undeniably adding to his worries. Ron was only travelling back
from Bill’s, around two hours further down the coast from their home in Dorset. And he should have been back two hours previously.
Of course, Severus knew that Bill was too much like his father in that he could
talk the back end off a hippogriff, and there was a very great chance that Ron
might not even have made it out of their front door yet. That thought made him
even angrier, it would be after midnight when Ron returned if that was the
case, and their anniversary would be long gone.
Severus
wasn’t even sure why he cared. He’d only ever really shown one soppy outburst
of sentimentalism in his life and that had been with Remus in 1983. Thinking on
how badly that had ended at the time, despite their friendship in the present,
Severus could see why he’d never really bothered with the spectacle again. A nice dinner and changing the bed sheets
doesn’t equate to rose petals everywhere, though. He sighed. The dinner had
been a challenge. Ron never failed to be exasperated at the fact that Severus
could create living death in a cauldron but when presented with a tin of baked
beans and a loaf of bread, the resultant mess wasn’t even edible. But he’d
tasted what he’d made that evening and had been proud and was sure Ron would
have been delighted with his passable attempt at a toad-in-the-hole with mash
and gravy. Hardly the food of love but
there we go.
Sighing
heavily again, Severus pushed back off the sink and reached for a glass on the
draining board. He drank very little in their home, preferring to keep it to
the very rare social situations they found themselves in; but, he remembered, in
justification of his actions whilst he unscrewed the cap of a bottle of whiskey
-he was lonely, and had no idea when that situation would be alleviated. He let
frozen ice cubes tumble out of his wand into the glass before pouring the amber
liquid over them, listening for the satisfying cracks the ice gave off, pleased
to have something other to focus his hearing on than the painfully slow ticking
of the third hand on the clock or straining his ears for the faint roar of an
approaching motorbike which had yet proved to materialise. He turned and slunk
into the living room, falling down on their new wonderfully squashy sofa. Alright. I concede. My old sofa was rubbish compared
to this.
George
looked up at him from where he was lazing in front of the fire, paws
haphazardly thrown where he fancied. Severus looked at the huge creature and
smiled slightly, taking a sip of his drink.
“I don’t
know,” he shrugged at the dog, who seemed to be asking him where Ron was, a
question confirmed when George’s eyes flickered towards the clock on the
sideboard purposefully.
“I know, I know he’s late,” Severus shrugged. “I don’t like it any more than
you do.”
George
rolled up to stand and padded over, climbing up onto the sofa half-heartedly.
His front paws rested on the seat cushion next to Severus, but his back legs
were still on the floor, almost as though he had forgotten to bring them up
with them.
Magical he
might be, but Severus loved the muggle, sleepy, dopey side of their pet dog
almost more than the intelligence which taught the dog to jump in the bath for
a pee if he needed one in the middle of the night. He reached out a hand and
stroked the silky auburn fur, another smile on his lips.
“Sit here
and worry together, then?” Severus asked quietly, resigning himself to a
conversation with the animal, and nearly groaned when the dog whimpered in
response.
***
Ron was
barely upright as he approached their front door, his fingers slipping over the
key he tried to select from the bunch in his hand. He was inexcusably late, he
knew, and he felt guilt layered over the queasy feeling in his stomach and the
pain in his body. Severus was going to go through the roof when he heard what
had happened. Still. You deserve a
fucking medal for the acting you just did, Ron told himself. Severus would have been a lot angrier had he
had to come and rescue you from Muggle hospital and the butchers that work
there.
Ron finally
found the right key and slid it into the lock with difficulty; his hand was
trembling so much. He heard a bark from within and knew George had given him
away. Of course, they’d both be up waiting for him. Of course they’d both be up to throw him filthy looks. If Ron had been
in any less of a state, he would have been preparing to heartily grovel, but he
simply didn’t have the strength.
He stepped
over the threshold and felt the familiar sensation of their privacy and
protection wards encompassing his body as they swept over him. It wasn’t nearly
enough to chase away the pain. He closed the door quietly and wondered just how
long he’d have to wait before the onslaught of deserved verbal abuse began.
“Where the fuck have you been?” The snarl ripped from the living room
doorway and Ron staggered slightly, trying to focus on the speaker. “Ron?”
“Mmm?”
Ron wished he could summon more energy with which to explain himself, to
apologise for ruining an anticipated evening.
“Oh my God,
what’s happened?” Severus’ voice was blurry and rushed, and Ron felt gentle
hands grapple his shoulders, stopping him from stumbling.
Ron dearly
would have liked to have answered, but the darkness calling was far more
enticing.
***
When he
came to, Ron was aware of being horizontal on something hard; he assumed it was
the floor. When he cracked his eyes open the lighting was dim and there was a
concerned face hovering above his own.
“Severus,
I’m so sorry,” the words came spewing out of his mouth before he could really
think about what he was saying –he only knew he had something huge to atone
for.
“Shh,” Ron felt a cool hand caressing his face, the thumb
rubbing just below his eye. “It’s alright. Stay calm.”
“I came off
the bike,” Ron whispered, turning his head into the touch.
“I thought
as much,” Severus couldn’t help the cold tone creeping into his voice. Nor
could he help the rage which had him wanting to march straight outside and
torch the infernal machine to the deepest circle of hell for hurting his
husband.
“It was at
that bend I can never handle,” Ron breathed, letting his eyes slide shut as he
recalled what had happened. “I leant too far over on the wheels and it was just
gone from under me and I was flying, and then it skidded into my side.”
“How the
hell did you get away without being carted off in an ambulance?” Severus
sighed.
“With a
performance that I frankly think deserved a fucking Order of Merlin,” Ron tried
to laugh but the pain which erupted down his side caused him to cry out instead.
“You’ll never guess what?” Severus sighed in the same despondent tone.
“What?” Ron
frowned, the effort made his face ache.
“You broke
those bloody ribs again, Ron,” he hissed. “Sooner or later they’re going to be
irreparable.”
“Fuck it,”
Ron muttered.
“Fuck it indeed. You’re lucky you’re not in a muggle hospital now being sliced
and bloody diced on an operating
table,” Severus’ temper was trying to rear out of him.
“I know,
I’m sorry, Severus, sorry I didn’t get home in time… I…”
“Just
rest,” Severus bent his head and pressed his lips to Ron’s brow. “I’m going to
get you into bed. I’ve fixed you up but you need to rest properly.”
Ron didn’t
make any move to protest as Severus managed to successfully levitate him into
their bedroom and settled him on the bed before spelling off his remaining
clothing. He winced seeing the renewed bruising down Ron’s right hand side and
on his legs. Thank god Remus did find the
fucking bike leathers. The damage
without them would have been hideous. He tugged the sheets up over the
battered body and sighed, before stripping off his own clothes. George hopped
up on the bed and stretched out along Ron’s bruised side, sensing his warmth
would be needed in the healing process. Severus crawled in alongside Ron and
dimmed the lights down to a minimum, knowing they wouldn’t bother his husband,
who was already half asleep. And Severus wouldn’t sleep a wink anyway. There
was no point in trying. He summoned his book from the living room and snuggled
in for a long night, his anger forgotten to be replaced with yet more worry.
***
The first
thing Ron heard when he woke up next was the sound of voices, and he felt the
thick heat and soft fur of George next to him. He cracked open his eyes and
found the room light, which meant it had to be morning. The dog blinked at him
and pushed his snout against Ron’s cheek lovingly.
“S’up George?” Ron tested out his vocal chords and
George’s head sprang up, more alert, mouth open in what looked like the dog
version of a smile.
Ron heard
the voices coming from the hallway, and as he woke up further he knew they were
talking about him. He pushed himself up with what he thought was surprising
ease, but then the pain shot down his right arm, his ribs and all the way
through his hip down to his foot. He didn’t have to look hard to see the
mottled purple, black and blue bruising. He flushed with embarrassment. Yet
again, he’d gone and broken himself. Yet again Severus would be left picking up
the pieces. George hopped quietly off the bed and Ron managed to stand up, even
though the pain in his ankle was insane. He reached for the first thing he
could find, which was Severus’ dressing gown. He pulled it around his body and
belted it shut, wincing as his side protested at even the light pressure from
the belt. The soft, powdery cinnamon smell he loved curled up around him and he
took comfort from it. He tried limping to the door but could only achieve what
would be more successfully described as a hop, and with relief he finally
grabbed hold of the door frame, swaying. You’ve really gone and done a number on yourself, twat.
He paused,
gathering his wits, and listened to the conversation in the hallway.
“Have you
seen the bike? It’s trashed. Fucking miracle he made it home on that.” That was
one of the twins.
Noooo. My baby. My beautiful baby. Ron couldn’t help the way his heart deflated at the news,
even after the bike had attempted to murder him the night before.
“Good,” Ron
recognised his mother’s voice. “Bloody death trap. I
don’t know why on earth you ever let him learn to ride it,” she snapped, and
Ron knew that was directed at his husband.
“Molly,” he
heard his dad placate. “You know as well as I do that Ron’s a force of nature
when he gets going. And I daresay he’ll be back on that bike as soon as it’s
fixed.”
Ron smiled
smugly at the perception his father seemed to hold with him.
“Not if I
have anything to do with it,” Severus spoke and Ron bit back his groan. “I’m
going to wheel it off the cliffs when he’s not looking.”
Jolted into
action by the hideous thought, Ron threw open the bedroom door and tried to
fight down the gasps of pain which were coming to him like air.
“You
fucking touch my bike and I’ll throw you off the cliffs,” he got out moodily.
“What a
nice thing to say to the man who’s healed you all night long,” George rolled
his eyes.
“Get back
in bed,” Severus ordered, and when Ron really looked at him he felt insanely
guilty.
Severus was
paler than usual (and that was saying something), his hair unkempt. He had deep
shadows beneath his eyes and looked ill. Ron swallowed the lump in his throat
and blinked at his husband stupidly.
“Dear
Merlin you’ve really gone to town on yourself this time,” George muttered, and
Ron felt the welcome support of an arm around his good side, and a gentle
tugging towards the kitchen. “You mugwump, Ron… you
wait until you see what you’ve done to it,” George whispered further in his
ear. “The engine’s fucked.”
“Bollocks,”
Ron groaned, and with relief sank into the kitchen chair George managed to
manoeuvre him into.
It hurt to
sit but then it also hurt to stand. And at least the pressure was off his
ankle. George looked down on him with a concerned expression and sighed.
“Imagine you’re in pain?”
Ron
breathed in deeply. “Nothing I can’t handle.”
“Oh so you don’t want this then?” George’s face broke into a grin as he picked
up a glass of potion sitting waiting on the kitchen table. “You don’t want this
beautiful, helpful pain potion?”
Ron thought
about being stoic but a particularly sharp pain in his ribs had him wincing. “I
want the pain potion,” he sighed pathetically.
George
snorted and handed him it, and watched as he knocked it back.
“Urgh, it tastes like shit,” Ron shuddered with a little
cough.
“But it
works,” Severus spoke and tugged the glass out of his hand. “That’s the maximum
strength you can have before you start getting loopy.”
“Thanks,”
Ron said, with real gratitude, even though the taste made him want to vomit.
As usual,
the effect of the potion was more or less instant, and he felt able to sit up a
little taller. His ankle stopped throbbing.
“Did I
break anything, Severus?” he asked quietly
“Only your
ribs,” he shook his head.
“My ankle’s giving out,” Ron frowned.
“You very nearly
broke that, but it was just torn ligaments.”
“Oh, yes, ‘just’,” George snorted.
“You know
what I mean,” Severus said irritably, rinsing his hands under the tap. “They’re
fine. And I did an internal organ scan and nothing’s bleeding. Though we all
think I should take you in to Mungo’s for-”
“NO!” Ron
shook his head. “Absolutely not.”
“Told you,”
George shrugged, shaking his head.
“I don’t
give a damn,” Severus said in a low voice which Ron immediately recognised as a
‘don’t fucking mess with me’ caution. “You need to be checked. I’m not a Healer
and I might have missed something. And as intent as YOU are to try and kill
yourself on a regular basis on that fucking
machine, Ron, the rest of us don’t particularly want
to try life without you.”
The words
tumbled out with such anger and passion Ron had to swallow away yet another
lump in his throat. Severus was glaring at him, hands clutching at a tea towel.
George looked between them and absorbed the sudden uncomfortable tension of
intruding on a private moment. Without another word, he turned and left the
kitchen, ushering his parents into the living room.
“I’m
sorry,” Severus breathed, as soon as he was gone, letting his eyes slide shut
and his face fall forward into his hand. “I’m sorry; I’m just tired and ratty
and worried out of my skull.”
“I’m sorry
too,” Ron sighed. “I’ll go to the hospital.”
“Just like
that, no fight?” Severus’ head snapped back up.
Ron simply
nodded, hoping that his willingness would speak all the words he needed to.
Severus
enveloped him in his arms and kissed the top of his hair firmly. “Love you.”
“Love you
too,” Ron leant into the embrace.
“I’m not
really going to roll your bike off the cliffs.”
“Sure about
that?”
Severus
paused. “No.”
***
“I told you
there was nothing wrong,” Ron said quietly as he limped, much more
successfully, to sink back down at the kitchen table.
Severus
muttered a reply under his breath which Ron thought it was probably wise for
his ears to ignore. Severus stomped to the kettle and put it on to boil,
keeping his back to his husband as he made them both tea, looking out of the
window when his hands weren’t occupied.
“The view
doesn’t change, Severus,” Ron murmured softly. “Not from one day you spend
glaring at it to the next.”
“I don’t
glare,” Severus replied and set down Ron’s mug of tea rather hard, and Ron was
reminded of a day almost exactly two years previously when Severus had sent his
desk swimming with tea with the same action.
Severus
caught him looking and knew the day he’d be thinking about. “Seems so long
ago,” he sat down and put his own mug down rather more carefully.
“And yet
you still don’t learn,” Ron vanished the spreading liquid with his wand, a
smile creeping over his lips.
Severus
rolled his eyes and shook his head, but he couldn’t deny the overwhelming need,
either through actual happiness or relief, to smile back at him.
“There’s
that smile I know and love,” Ron exhaled pointedly, as though he’d been waiting
on bated breath for the occasion.
“I don’t
know why on earth I’m smiling at you,” Severus took a sip of tea. “You sure as
hell don’t deserve it after how much you scared me.”
“I scared
myself just as much as I scared you,” Ron raised his eyebrows and his eyes
glazed over slightly, remembering the electrifying fear that had shot through
him as he’d flown through the air.
“And that’s
meant to grant you a reprieve from my distaste?” Severus retorted
sarcastically.
“No,” Ron
shook his head, snapping back to the present. “No, of course
not.”
“Good, because it doesn’t.”
Ron didn’t
reply, just took his own mouthful of tea and looked out of the window.
“Now who’s staring at the view?” Severus teased.
Ron laughed
and properly looked at his husband again. He looked so tired that Ron knew he
deserved the stab of guilt which hit his gut. “You should go and get some
sleep… you look dead on your feet.”
“No,”
Severus shook his head. “You owe me an anniversary night and you’re going to
start right now with an overdue foot massage which, if you remember rightly,
you gave me an IOU for and told me to cash it in last night.”
“Coupon
expired at midnight, sadly,” Ron winked, but reached down and hooked his hand
around Severus’ ankle and pulled it up into his lap.
He unzipped
the boot and chucked it unceremoniously onto the floor, ignoring Severus’ wince
at the way Ron treated their clothes. Severus did, however, manage to bite down
his lecture as Ron encompassed his foot with his large hands, which for some
reason, ached as though he’d been on it all day. I actually have been on it all day. He shifted in his chair and
rested on the back fully. He groaned and said, “Alright. That might grant you a reprieve from my distaste.”
“Your
distaste is a puddle on the floor,” Ron sighed smugly, pressing his thumbs into
the pad of the foot he held through the sock.
He massaged
in silence for a few moments, glad of the advanced healing and potions they’d
given him at the hospital. Apart from his ankle and his ribs, he felt totally
back to normal. His ribs he was used to, they flared up so often, and his ankle
was nothing more than an ache and a limp. Ron let his thumb caress the arch of
the foot, almost non-existent compared to his own. Feet were one thing Ron had
never given very much thought to. They were just there, they helped him walk.
But the simple act of what he was doing now, rubbing the socked foot of the man
he loved, was a bridge to comfort. Severus hated his feet, but then Ron had
never met anybody with such intense dislike of their own being and body as
Severus.
He had
challenged him before to stand naked in front of the mirror and find just one
thing he liked about himself. Severus had told him he wasn’t in the mood for
playing futile games and had promptly gotten into bed and rammed his eyes shut,
feigning instantaneous slumber. But Ron knew he’d simply just been too unhappy
at what he would see in the mirror, and too scared to look at it.
Ron had
long since stopped trying to point out that beauty was in the eye of the
beholder and that no matter what Severus thought, he thought Severus was beautiful. There had been little point in
continuing. Ron had been taking a different tact ever since –the ‘throwing
compliments around until I’m blue in the face but meaning every single one’
tact. Severus had never commented on it. Ron didn’t know if that meant he was
oblivious or basking in forced ignorance. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the
answer.
It was tiring;
loving someone who so thoroughly failed to believe there was any good in them.
It served as a welcome reminder to Ron, who, hardly the most egotistical man in
the world, to fight down a lot of his self-deprecation in order to spare
Severus the bother of trying to convince him to the contrary. When that had
happened, Ron couldn’t pinpoint. Somewhere between a trip to Azkaban and a vicious onslaught from a male
veela, probably.
“Tell me,
does your train of thought have a dining carriage?” Severus’ voice cut through
his wondering and Ron snapped back to the present, realising he’d let his hands
still on the foot, which nudged him in the stomach gently.
“Two, first
class and standard,” Ron smiled, and resumed his massaging. “And
a funky little electric toilet.”
Severus
snorted. “Your hands are like imported heaven,” he smoothed his foot up Ron’s
stomach, and smiled when Ron wrapped his arms around it and hugged it like he
would anything else he loved, savouring the warmth. As usual, he noticed the
missing scent which usually came from body parts kept in cramped, dark
confines.
“You’re the weirdest person on earth,” Ron
shook his head. “You just… don’t stink. I don’t think you even have sweat
glands.”
“Just
jealous because it means I spend less time washing,” Severus rolled his eyes,
though he’d never considered his body to be abnormal.
“Oh,
right,” Ron scoffed. “Mr. Thirty Minute Shower.”
“And you think
I’m just showering when I take that
long?” Severus raised an amused eyebrow, bringing his mug to his lips.
“So vile,”
Ron stroked the foot he was cuddling with an index finger.
“You’re
just jealous because you can’t do it,” Severus spat out the quick mouthful of
tea he took before realising the insult behind his words. “No, wait, I-”
Ron
released the foot and pushed it to the floor, choosing not to care if the leg
hurt on the way down.
“That was
really thoughtless of me,” Severus tried again. “You know I’m not taking the
piss out of you, Ron. It was just my quick mouth getting me in trouble.”
Ron
breathed heavily through his nose and reached down for Severus’ other leg,
showing no sign of either anger or resentment, other than that he chucked the
second boot down a little harder on the floor than the first. He pressed his
fingers into the foot and worked at it diligently, keeping his lips in a
neutral line.
“Ow, son of
a-” Severus hissed and yanked his foot back as pain shot through his foot and
his damaged shoulder roared into life.
“What?” Ron
exclaimed, “I didn’t do anything?”
“It’s not
you,” Severus winced, replacing his foot on the cold kitchen floor. “My
shoulder’s been acting up today and the point on my foot that corresponds with
it didn’t take kindly to being poked.”
“I wasn’t poking,” Ron said indignantly, sitting up straight. “And there’s a
point on your foot that corresponds with your shoulder? What?”
Severus
hissed as the pain coursed through him again, “I just mean… never mind,” he got
to his feet and bent down to pick his boots up, and carried them into the
hallway.
When he
returned to the kitchen Ron was frozen in place, the gone from his face but his
posture said enough.
“Maybe
neither of us is in the right frame of mind for an anniversary night in,”
Severus told him, fingers desperately massaging over his aching shoulder joint.
“No, maybe
we’re not,” Ron’s voice, in comparison to his face, was fuming with annoyance.
Attempting
to diffuse the animosity, Severus bent over him and placed a kiss on the top of
his hair, but Ron sat stock still.
“Oh come
on,” Severus begged and willed himself upright, bringing his fingers up to
pinch at the bridge of his nose. “Ron, I’m sorry for being rude about the
shower thing, and I’m sorry for being in pain when you massaged me. There,
happy?”
Severus
didn’t have the energy to fight, not that evening. He’d spent the day worriedly
watching the Healers scan his husband for internal injury, his guts twisting in
fear every time one of them paused to write a note, look twice at something or just
scratch their nose. He felt like a thoroughly wrung sponge and no matter how
hard he tried, he just knew he wasn’t
going to be able to drum up the strength to stay free of his recently-dormant
snappy attitude.
Ron let out
of a huff of exasperation and Severus couldn’t particularly see the point of
staving off the inevitable. The sooner they argued, the sooner they could make
up. He wasn’t fool enough to expect them never
to fight or shout over tiny, ridiculous things –it was what happened in
relationships, and it was healthy. But that didn’t mean he had to enjoy it.
“What’s
your problem?” he asked, voice colder than he’d expected.
“I don’t
have a problem,” Ron got to his feet and limped to the sink.
“Well if
this is cheerfulness and sunshine, I dread to think how you’d treat me in an
actual mood,” Severus replied dryly.
Ron groaned
in frustration. “I’m sorry for being ever-so-slightly stung by your little
joke,” he spat. “I’m sorry for hurting you even though I didn’t know I could.
I’m really sorry that the road was slippery and I nearly offed
myself on the tarmac last night. I’m even sorrier that I messed up your
favourite night of the year.” He paused for breath. “Now, if you don’t
understand my bad mood, maybe it wouldn’t kill you to think of the possibility that maybe, I actually mean those
words, and that I feel a little emotion called guilt, Severus.”
“So if you
feel guilty why the fuck are you sulking instead of just being polite and
making it up to me?”
Ron shrugged.
“I don’t know. Maybe because I can’t plan my moods out like some pre-programmed
perfect bloody husband.”
“What the
hell is that supposed to mean?” Severus didn’t know if it had been intended as
an insult, but it sounded like one.
“Oh it
means nothing,” Ron snapped, shaking his head angrily.
“Doesn’t
sound like it meant nothing,” Severus folded his arms across his chest, putting
up the barriers which so ineptly attempted to block his heart.
Ron really
hadn’t meant what Severus was interpreting the comment to mean. Ron always
admired Severus’ self control and ever-growing patient nature when it came to
their relationship. Severus could be blunt and sharp at all once, but his
temper had been generally held under a very tight seal over the last year or so.
Ron didn’t think he’d ever seen it truly released, even before then. He admired
that, he didn’t mock it. He wished he had only half of the self restraint.
Every time he and Severus had argued within the last two months, it had been he
who had instigated it. And of course, Ron had felt the cold thrill when Severus
shouted at him, because the man wasn’t a saint. If Ron started an argument,
Severus fought back with aplomb and finesse, and each knew from their days in
an academic environment with the other, that neither was afraid to let it
digress to a shouting match.
“Well it
really wasn’t an insult directed at you,” Ron sighed wearily, leaning back
against the sink.
“Yeah,
right,” Severus shook his head. “You know how many years it took me of losing
my temper to learn how to control it, Ron? You really think after everything
I’ve experienced I’d let a stupid little argument with you ruffle me into
losing it?” He felt the sneer distort his lips and groaned inwardly. It was
never a good sign. “Well you can think what you want, but I’ve had my years of
being a hot-headed twerp and they’re well behind me.”
“Did you just call me a hot-headed twerp?”
Ron asked, mouth falling open –half at the cheek, and half in shock that
anybody still used the word ‘twerp’.
“Why, want
me to think of something ruder?” Severus snarled. “So I can correspond with you
in a language you understand?”
Ron’s eyes
narrowed. “That was seriously uncalled for.”
“Why? Just
like everything else in our fucking lives, Ron, the age difference comes into
play. The age difference you swore to me would be fine, but keeps on cropping
up.”
“It is fine. The only person who it’s not
fine for, for who it has NEVER been fine, is you, Severus!” Ron jabbed his
index finger at him.
“Oh sod
off,” Severus scoffed and stomped to the kitchen door.
“Don’t tell
me to sod off because I take umbrage at you insulting my intelligence,” Ron
slammed his hand down on the worktop, and instantly regretted it; the pain
sprang back into existence.
Severus
frowned and thought back over his words. “I didn’t insult your intelligence, I
didn’t mean that.”
“Oh,
right,” Ron rolled his eyes. “And don’t pull that face at me either –this is
how it feels when someone will never, ever think the best of you, Severus,
never consider that a word spoken is actually the truth, and not some thinly
veiled dig.”
“I do think
the best of you!” Severus shouted, hurt bubbling amongst his anger. “How dare you imply that I don’t?”
“Well how dare you imply that I don’t either?!” Ron shouted
back in a childish repetition of the previous point.
It had the
desired effect though. Unable to stand and argue any longer, Severus glared
down his nose at Ron and stiffened. “When you’ve decided to revert back to your
actual age from your shoe size, why don’t you come and find me?” he turned and
stomped along to their bedroom. “And then we’ll talk like fucking adults!” He
slammed the bedroom door behind him as he stepped inside, and threw up a
barrier around the wood with his wand.
He heard a
shout from the kitchen which sounded very much like “Oh, right, ripping the
fucking door off its hinges, Severus, REALLY FUCKING MATURE! WHICH ONE OF US IS
THE TWENTY YEAR OLD?!”
Severus
didn’t even care that Ron had a point. It’s
the fucking principal. With a sulky swagger he couldn’t remember using
since he was a teenager; Severus threw himself down on their bed and buried his
face into the pillows, face beginning to burn in shame at his juvenile
behaviour.
In the
kitchen, Ron was left staring down the darkened hallway with his mouth open. He
took in a shuddering breath and bit his lip, fighting down the self-indulgent
impulse to burst into noisy tears. He gulped a few times and managed to chase
away the burning in his eyes.
“Now what
am I supposed to do?” he asked the room moodily.
The light
was fading outside the cottage. But he could still limp with George for a walk
in it. “George?” He called, listening out for the thudding of paws on the
floor, but they did not come.
He peered
into the hallway and frowned. He walked to the small stairway which led only
half the way up into the cottage’s attic. Sitting huddled at the bottom of the
ladder which led the rest of the way, George looked at him. Ron didn’t have to
strain his eyes to see the animal shaking.
“Oh George,”
Ron sat down next to him on the top step, and pulled the animal into his arms
gently. “I’m sorry. I know you hate it when we shout.”
The dog
looked up and slid his tongue along Ron’s jawline in
a messy lick. Ron wasn’t averse to a bit of dog spit, and he could almost tell
rubbing it off would have upset the canine even more.
“I don’t
even know where that bloody came from,” Ron said ruefully, and let the dog lick
his face again. “Just kind of erupted from nowhere… I’m really sorry, Georgieluffs.” Severus hated that nickname, born of
George’s love of hunting out Snargaluff stumps, even
though the adventure never turned out well for him. Ron used it now with a
strong ring of defiance.
They sat in
silence for a few moments whilst Ron contemplated his options. He could barge
in and demand reconciliation, but knew the sulking period was as healthy as the
argument. He could take George for a walk, but he was tired. He could go and
visit someone, but then Severus had won. Ron shook his head at the realisation
that leaving the house was akin to waving a white flag and surrendering. It was
his house too and he wouldn’t be chased out of it by an argument.
“That
leaves us with one option, George,” he sighed dramatically. “Food,
wine, bath, telly and a night in the spare room.”
The
television was a relatively new addition to their living room. Severus had
suggested it after Ron admitted he had never watched television before, and
never seen a film. So they now had a television, cleverly charmed by Severus to
repel the effects of all the magic in the house, and a shelf full of films that
were deemed essential. Quite by who, Ron forgot, but most of them weren’t bad.
And some of them were actually pretty good.
Ron got to
his feet and descended the four steps to the hallway, and pointed his wand
quietly at their bedroom door. He sent a small gust of air at it and watched as
sparks flew when the air hit the magical barrier. Although Ron wasn’t
surprised, he found himself hurt by the fact that Severus had blocked him out of
their bedroom.
***
When
Severus awoke with a jolt, he was immediately confused. He was fully dressed
and the lights in the room were on, but he was alone. He realised he was both
hungry and thirsty, and busting for the toilet, and walked halfway to the door
before he realised why he should be in such a state.
Oh Merlin. I can’t believe I blocked
him out of our bedroom. Severus glanced back at the clock and saw that it was nearly one in the
morning. With an ashamed sigh he waved his wand at the door and pulled it open.
The house was dark apart from the living room, where he could hear the gentle
hum of the television left on. Severus ignored it as he made his way to the
kitchen and gave himself some light. With a lurch of his stomach he saw a note
on the counter and snatched it up.
‘Dinner is in the oven. X’
Severus’
eyes confirmed that this was exactly the case. He burned with embarrassment
that Ron had still thought to leave him food even after he’d done something as
rude as to lock him out of their mutual space. Severus dropped the note and
headed into the bathroom. He unzipped his trousers and relieved himself, all
the while feeling like the ill-tempered arsehole everyone assumed he was.
Whilst he washed his hands he contemplated how on earth he was going to be able
to make up for his actions. Whilst he dried them he still didn’t know. Crossing
into the living room he didn’t have the foggiest.
The sight
that met his eyes made his heart skip a beat with guilt and a surge of
sweetness. Ron was lying fully clothed positioned on his back on the sofa, one
arm dangling off it onto the floor, his feet thrown over the arm. His eyes were
closed, his mouth was open and he was snoring lightly. George was squashed into
the space between Ron’s raised legs and the chair, and the title screen of a
film hummed noiselessly on the television screen, having clearly finished
whilst Ron was asleep.
Severus couldn’t suppress his smile at Ron’s choice of film, as he waved his
wand at the television and turned it off. Hermione had told Ron that he should
watch the BBC adaptation of ‘Lady Chatterley’s Lover’ just for the main male
lead if nothing else. Severus quite agreed. There was something about Sean Bean
as a groundskeeper that had been severely lacking in the form of Rubeus Hagrid.
Severus
dropped to his knees level with Ron’s head and shook his shoulder gently. “Ron,
wake up.”
It took
several more shakes before Ron even groaned, and Severus was overcome with his
usual jealousy that Ron could sleep like the dead. He stroked a smooth cheek
and whispered, “Wake up, Ron, it’s late, you’ve got to come to bed.”
“Finally going to let me in the fucking bedroom then, are we?” Ron muttered,
keeping his eyes closed.
“Sorry about that. I put the protection up in a temper,” Severus apologised.
“S’fine,” Ron muttered, eyes still closed. “What time is
it?”
“One in the
morning,” Severus took up the hand which was on the floor and pulled it to his
lips. “Come to bed, angel.”
At that
Ron’s eyes finally opened. It wasn’t like Severus to use a term of endearment.
He stared at him coolly, breath shallow from the
process of awakening.
“Angel?”
Ron couldn’t help his smile.
“Shut up,”
Severus swallowed his embarrassment at his mushy slip up, and got to his feet.
“Come to bed.”
George
hopped off the sofa and stretched his front paws out on the carpet luxuriously,
a long yawn widening his jaws. Severus flicked his wand and opened the back
door for the dog to go to the toilet. As George sniffed the fresh air he took
off, and Ron groaned and rolled onto his side, then up into a sitting position
on the sofa.
“Sorry, I fell asleep out here,” he muttered. “Know you didn’t want me sleeping
on the sofa ‘cos of ruining the cushions.”
“Well I
shouldn’t have been idiotic enough to lock you out of your own bedroom then.”
“Was going to the spare room… fell asleep before I got there,” Ron murmured,
struggling to properly wake up.
“Not to
worry,” Severus hauled him to his feet, noticing how he lifted his right foot
off the floor and winced. “Do you want some more potion?”
Ron nodded
and swayed slightly before grabbing hold of Severus in a tight grip and burying
his face in his shoulder. “Hate it when we fight, Severus.”
“I hate it
too,” Severus lifted Ron’s chin and placed a gentle kiss on his warm lips.
They stood
together for a few minutes; Severus stroking Ron’s sleep tousled hair
absentmindedly whilst Ron seemed to wake up. He raised his head and licked his
lips.
“I missed
the end of the fucking video,” he looked at the television.
“Do you
agree about Sean Bean?” Severus smiled.
“Totally,”
Ron’s mouth curved into a filthy smile. “Guessing he’s suffering from terminal
heterosexuality, however, so I’ll just be content with my massively full lot of
you.”
“What did
you think of the story?”
“Bit…
raunchy, right, for the time it was written?”
“It was banned, caused a lot of controversy.”
“And how do you know so much about it?”
“I stole my
mum’s copy when I was bored the summer before my last year at Hogwarts. That
book was banned and it meant it was an instant must-have, even if people did
wrap it up in all sorts to try and hide it.”
“You stole
your mother’s copy?” Ron asked in an amused voice. “You?”
“I can’t
have been the only one, and I was seventeen and wanted to know what the fuss
was about,” Severus flushed, very glad his mother’s spirit was not around to
hear his confession, having taken to spending much of her time, surprisingly,
at Hogwarts.
“You were a
randy little sod, weren’t you?” Ron teased.
Severus laughed, his head tilting back as he did so. “Come on, angel
face.”
“What’s up
with the new name?” Ron pulled back and yawned, hand never making it to cover
his mouth.
“Put it
down to tiredness,” Severus winked.
“Shame, I
kind of liked it,” Ron headed out into the hallway and walked to the back door,
watching George snuffle around a molehill in the garden.
He groaned
with pleasure as he felt hands smooth around his torso and settle over his
tummy, pulling backwards into the warmth of Severus’ body. The night was still
and pleasant. Both of them could hear the sea in the distance and see the
rotating light of the working lighthouse offshore. Ron turned his head with
interest when he saw that Severus had turned off the kitchen light, and was met
with gentle lips.
“You can
see all the stars,” Severus explained, looking over his shoulder. “It’s so
beautiful here. So untouched.”
Ron could only voice his agreement in a murmur. His eyes took in the dark sky
and tiny pinpricks of shining light. “Is it wrong that after seven years of
Astronomy, I still can’t quite recognise each one?”
Severus
chuckled in his ear. “Sinistra would be weeping into
her gillywater if she could hear you, Ron.”
“I know… I
just… every lesson I was so tired. The amount of black eyes Hermione fixed for
me because I kept poking my eye on my telescope falling asleep…”
Severus
laughed again and said, “You’re not the first and you won’t be the last. I can
remember nodding off a few times…”
“And here I was thinking you were the perfect student…”
“Perfect
students need sleep to be brilliant,” Severus whispered and kissed against
Ron’s ear.
George
ambled back to their side and looked up, wondering what they were both staring
at. Ron reached a hand down and scratched at his ears absentmindedly. “I think
we upset him earlier with the shouting.”
“As much as
we upset each other, I’d imagine,” Severus sighed, squidging
Ron tighter in his arms.
“Ow, ribs,
Severus,” Ron reminded him breathily.
“Sorry,”
Severus instantly let go until the only things remaining on Ron were his hands,
positioned on each side of his waist, and his head was bent, kissing gently
onto the side of Ron’s neck.
“Severus,
I’ve decided I’m not going to use the bike anymore. Except for local stuff,”
Ron said quietly. “I thought about it a lot tonight. Selfish of me to put
myself at risk like that… we’re a couple. And I don’t want to leave you by
yourself should anything happen to me.”
“I can’t
ask you to give it up,” Severus swallowed. “That’d be… too controlling. I have
never set out to control you.”
“I know you
haven’t. So I’m giving it up willingly. I’ll use it to get to the village and
back and to ride in the daylight… but night time is just too dangerous and
selfish.”
“You’re not
selfish,” Severus rested his chin on Ron’s shoulder. “Anything
but.”
“It is selfish to constantly
place myself in danger.”
“You want
me to give up my car under the same reasoning?” Severus frowned.
“Hell no. Merlin, Henry’s as much of a part of you as your repressively
buttoned wizarding robes, Severus,” Ron smiled to the stars.
Severus
wasn’t going to argue. It was only after being outside of his teaching position
for so long that he had realised that his wizard attire was repressing, and that there was something beautifully simplistic
about a shirt and a pair of trousers, or even better, a jumper and a pair of jeans.
“Then you
shouldn’t have to give up the bike.”
“I want
to.”
“You’re
just saying it to make yourself feel better about the accident,” Severus nosed
at his hair, and inhaled the scent. “You’ll feel differently in a couple of
weeks. I’ll fix it for you.”
“I don’t
want to die and leave you behind,” Ron said so quietly Severus might not have
heard it had he not been so close.
“Nobody who
loves another really wants that,” Severus said gently. “Nobody wants to do
that. But you have to accept when your time is. If it’s coming for you, it’ll
take you, Ron.”
“I don’t
like those odds,” Ron replied shakily.
“Well I
don’t think we’re meant to like them.”
“But you’ve
learned to live with them?”
“After the
life I’ve led? Yes. Even more so after meeting you. And almost losing you once.”
“Which is
why I won’t tempt fate any more than is necessary,” Ron said decisively.
“Fate will
do what it wants,” Severus made a face that Ron couldn’t see. “It’s never
failed to surprise me before.”
“You don’t believe in fate.”
“No, I
dislike the existence of it in our lives, the way we’re controlled by it.”
“You once told me you could stomach a lot but not fate and destiny… why the
sudden turn around?”
“Good old
denial,” Severus smiled at the night sky. “Bitch of a thing
but as welcome as an old lover when you need it.”
Ron turned
to face him and Severus was lifted away by the sheer handsomeness of his face,
taking on that ethereal beauty it always did in the moonlight. “The thought of
losing you sends me cold.”
“And me
you,” Severus licked his lips. “Why so morbid tonight, Ron?
You avoid the subject of death like the plague normally.”
“Risking it
makes you think strange things,” Ron shrugged, and placed one hand on Severus’
chest. “It makes you re-evaluate what you’d leave behind.”
“I can see
the obituary now: Ronald Weasley leaves behind a cantankerous old husband, who
neglected to comment on account of his misery, and a dog, George, who was
unavailable for comment because he finally gained access to chew on the dear
departed’s guitar strap, which he has been trying to obtain for months.”
Despite the
melancholic nature of the conversation, Ron tilted his head back and laughed.
“And he also leaves a family wondering if their lives will ever be the same
again without the force which keeps them all with empty food supplies.”
Severus
smiled and kissed him. “I wonder what mine would be like.”
Ron
surveyed him, searching for permission to joke. “Hideously uncomplimentary, I’m
sure.”
Severus
laughed and kissed him again, remaining locked at the lip for longer, letting
his tongue venture forth between his own lips and brush against Ron’s. He
submitted immediately and soon they were gripping each other with renewed
vigour, biting lips and sucking tongues and rubbing against bodies.
Ron broke off,
the tightness in his chest making him gasp more quickly then Severus.
“Want to
take this to the bedroom?” Severus ducked his head and planted a trail of
feather-light kisses up Ron’s throat.
“I could be
persuaded,” Ron’s mouth twitched with a smile.
Severus
stood up straight and raised his fingers to trail over Ron’s windpipe and
Adam’s apple, caressing all the spots which he would respond to. As his little
finger traced over one of the scars desecrating the creamy softness, Ron gave
an unknowing thrust against Severus’ body and groaned slightly.
“I have a
present for you,” he said suddenly, hands flying to Severus’ chest.
“Is it your
sweet backside?” Severus raised an eyebrow hopefully.
“No. Well.
Later,” Ron winked. “But I have something I meant to give you last night before
engineering failed me.”
“A bad
workman always blames his tools,” Severus smirked.
“Alright, before my own skills failed me,” Ron didn’t stop to comment further.
“It’s in the bedroom.”
With the
back door locked, a pain potion apiece sunk and George sprawled in front of the
dying fire, Ron rummaged in his half of their chest of draws.
“You said
no presents,” Severus told him irritably. “Now I look rubbish.”
“I’ve never
claimed to be consistent,” Ron laughed, fingers closing around what he was
looking for. “And anyway… you might not like it, so don’t feel too rubbish
about it yet.”
Severus sat
down on the edge of the bed in the middle of undressing and looked at him
curiously. Ron had to blink a few times to focus; there was something
unbelievably distracting about when his husband went anywhere shirtless.
“I went
with Harry and Ginny to choose their wedding bands, if you remember?” Ron
swallowed, and walked to the end of the bed.
“Yes, I
remember your resultant bad mood and the two hour bath it took to drag you out
of it,” Severus nodded.
“From that
night you only remember the bath?”
Ron smirked.
“Well, no,
but… you know what, just get to the point and give me the present?” Severus
grinned.
“Well. I
had a lot of time to walk around that bloody jewellery shop,” Ron gave an
overdramatic shudder. “And I found this. I know you hate jewellery and stuff so
it was a bit of a risk. But I have to confess that something about it just… it
just turned me on in a way I can’t explain.”
If Severus
looked curious before, he was now trying to bore a hole through the small pouch
Ron was holding with his eyes with eagerness. Ron held it out to him and
dropped it into the air -Severus caught it deftly, fingers working against the
tied ribbon closing the small velvet bag.
He almost
missed what slithered out of it when he upended the pouch; it was so fine and
dainty. The second it touched his fingers Severus knew what he was holding, he
sensed the magic in the delicate metal. His eyes swivelled to Ron questioningly.
“If you
hate it, and the idea, and you don’t want it, that’s fine,” Ron said firmly.
“Honestly. I know how you are about the idea of… belonging and claiming and
stuff.”
“That’s not
what the magic is about though,” Severus said softly, picking up one end of the
chain which was thinner than should be humanly possible. “Who made it?”
“It’s Elf-made,”
Ron nibbled on his lip nervously.
“That would
mean that… the magic doesn’t just bond? The magic protects and heals, as well?”
Ron nodded
and smiled. “I thought, what with me being such a… how did you put it? Such an
‘unmitigated disaster area’” he mimicked Severus’ voice, “… the magic might
help, you know, keep me alive.”
Severus
laughed and watched the bedroom lights glint off the precious metal chain he
held in his hand. “You realise how permanent these are though, Ron? They will
never break the seal once they’re activated. Not until one of us is fatally injured
beyond their protective magic, or dies of old age? Even then, we only get the
choice of removing… if we leave it, the bond remains. If for whatever reason
we… split up, you won’t be able to just take this chain off…”
“I know, I
talked to the shop owner about it,” Ron shrugged. “It was part of the appeal.
But Severus, I know how you feel about slave bonds and stuff-”
“It’s not a
slave bond,” Severus frowned. “I thought you said you talked to the owner?”
“The principles aren’t far different,” Ron looked at him. “It’s different,
isn’t it, to a wedding band? We could break those bonds,
we could go and divorce with the registrar. But this will never break until we
die. Just like slave bond adornments. You can set free the slave but you can
never take away the impression of your magic on them, nor can you remove the
jewellery you put on them.”
“Are you
reciting from a book?” Severus asked incredulously.
“Well,
Severus, you have a huge library, I was bound to start reading it one day,” Ron
rolled his eyes with a smirk.
“It’s
different to a slave bond. Magic like this is entered into with love. If you
didn’t love the other person, the metal would never take –it would never seal
in the first place.” Severus said thoughtfully, looking back at the chain. “So
I feel very differently about this than I would you asking me to shove a needle
through your dick and proclaim myself your Master.”
Ron
shuddered and said, “Thank God it’s different.”
“Sorry,
that was too much information, wasn’t it?” Severus’ eyes flicked at his husband
–he tried to keep his seedier knowledge locked away and tried never to share of
it.
“So you
like the idea?” Ron asked, much more warmly. “You want to use it?”
“Where?”
Severus was thinking of where they could place the delicate strings of links.
They were unusual. He dreaded to think how much Ron had paid for it. They would
attract attention.
“I know
it’s a bit obvious,” Ron murmured, he was suddenly sitting next to Severus. He
reached out and took Severus’ left hand, turning his wrist out into the light.
“But I thought maybe your left wrist, and my right?”
“Why like
that?” Severus frowned, trying to sense in his logic.
“Because
you always sleep on the left side of the bed, and I always sleep on the right,”
Ron laughed. “If you don’t want wrists, maybe ankles?”
“No, not ankles… that’s… more slave than you know. Wrists are… well, you
know how my wrists react to you. And, it’ll be better, as the magic is closer
to the pulse point. But be prepared, even though they’re tiny, and they seem barely
noticeable, people will be enthralled with them.”
“Have you
seen many?” Ron asked.
“Only one,”
Severus closed his fingers around the chain, knowing that he wasn’t imagining
the subtle throb of magic it pulsed out to him.
“People
stare at us all the time,” Ron laughed. And it was true. Severus’ long hair
drew enough attention from the muggle community, and Ron’s scars did the same.
When they stepped out together, in either magical or muggle surroundings, they
seemed to be a magnet for lingering eyes. The people in their own village were
only just getting used to seeing them together as a couple. Ron was convinced a
few of them still thought they were an inappropriately affectionate father and
son, or nephew and uncle. “So what’s a little more attention, eh?”
Ron knocked
apart Severus’ fingers and scooped up the chain, feeling the magic himself. He
got up and moved to sit on Severus’ other side and tugged his sleeve up to his
elbow. “So. Sure you want to do this?”
Severus
didn’t want to falter and hurt Ron’s feelings, but he knew the chains would be
as close as they’d get to ‘belonging and claiming’, as Ron had put it, without
passing into the realms of slave talk. But
it’s nothing to do with slaves. There’s rarely ever love in a slave bond. The
only way this would be enslaving is if you didn’t love him, and it would never
work in the first place if that were the case…
“As long as
you are,” he said somewhat gruffly, trying to recompense for the emotion
bubbling in his chest at the thoughtful and eternal gift.
Ron smiled
easily at him and motioned for him to pick up his wand. Then Ron held one end
of the slight chain between his index finger and thumb, and draped it over the
two upturned wrists, now touching side by side.
“We just
have to send a magical signature at them,” Ron said. “A puff of air should do
it.”
“I know, I do
read my own library as well,” Severus laughed softly.
Together
they raised their wands and sent identical puffs of air, each feeling the
other’s creep over their delicate skin. Together they sat and watched as the
chain drew closed by itself, forming a large bracelet around them both with no
noticeable clasp. Then the chain tightened until it grazed on the skin and
neither could hold back their gasp as they felt the cool impartation of the
joined magic seeping through their flesh. Ron instantly noticed that his wrist
felt highly sensitized. Severus watched with fascination as the chain enlarged
back to its original size, before condensing yet again, and squeezing even more
tightly, stretched across the veins at his pulse point, making them tingle.
As the
chain returned to size once more, bright sparks flew from the metal, and it
suddenly split noiselessly, causing their wrists to jerk apart. But the chains
formed renewed circles around each of the separate bone structures, and shrunk
down in size again, squeezing even more tightly than the two previous times,
and Severus let out a groan as the feeling shot straight up his arm, into his
chest, and then surprisingly directly to his groin; he heard Ron echoing the
sentiment. Then, the chains swelled slightly to accommodate to the natural size
of each of their wrists, and with a final shower of sparks, tiny, almost
inconceivably small t-bar clasps appeared on the chains and the magic was
finished.
Severus
wasn’t quite sure what to say –he found himself struck with the same level of
tongue-tied inability that he had experienced when they’d been married. He
swallowed and looked sideways at Ron, who was beaming at the chain looping his
wrist as though it were the most miraculous thing he had ever seen.
“Can you
feel it?” Severus almost missed Ron’s whisper.
“Feel
what?” Severus shook his head to clear it.
Ron’s
fingers enclosed with his and Severus gasped at the new sensation. Through
Ron’s hand it was almost as though he could feel his life force flowing from
his very core, and his magic swirling within him.
“You could
feel it without touching?” Severus asked, and instantly withdrew his hand,
concentrating, searching for a sensation which, he was frustrated to find, was
not there.
Ron closed
his eyes and inhaled deeply. “I’m more aware of you than I ever was,” he
smiled, feeling the magic swirling around him.
“Why can’t
I feel that?” Severus asked, trying to hide his disappointment.
“Think we
might have to thank old Lucius Malfoy for something else,” Ron said quietly,
losing himself amidst the cocoon that surrounded him.
A thought
struck Severus then. “Ron… these bracelets… they have the strength to repair.”
Ron caught
on immediately and tugged himself out of the heavenly comfort he was
experiencing to shove his hand down the front of his trousers, groping for his
penis.
“Nope.
Still nothing,” he shook his head. He hadn’t believed for a second that the
chains would fix his curse injuries; he’d not even considered it.
“You don’t
know what else they might have fixed, though,” Severus said gently, and lowered
his wrist to massage a hand against Ron’s groin. “You don’t know… internally…
what they might have solved.”
“I didn’t do this for that,” Ron looked at him. “I did this for the benefits it
would bring to our relationship.”
“Still, you
don’t know,” Severus smiled, and tugged the wrist encircled by Ron’s half of
the bracelet up to his lips.
When those
lips connected to the skin, Ron thought he might well have been pulsed with a
thousand sensory spells. “Oh sweet Merlin it’s even better than before.”
Disregarding
his ankle and his aching ribs, Ron got to his feet and stripped off his
clothes, so that the only thing he was wearing was his wedding band and the
glinting chain around his wrist. Severus’ eyes followed his every move and
hungrily ate the sight of the toned stomach level with his eyes.
He got to
his own feet and stripped off his trousers and underwear. Ron had moved nearer
to the bed again and Severus didn’t know where his reaction came from. In a
fluid, cat-like movement, he pounced, wrapping his arms around Ron and holding
him as they crashed onto the bed, furiously kissing.
The
pouncing action had set the rules of play, Ron instantly submitted when Severus
gathered his wrists and held them above his head, and let his legs be guided as
Severus pushed one foot out as far as he could go, taking care not to hurt the
tender ankle, and trapped the other leg beneath him, as he’d taught Ron to do
so long ago.
“I have
never been so utterly driven to call you mine,” Severus muttered breathlessly,
dropping his head to take the pierced nipple he saw between his teeth.
“I am yours,” Ron breathed, arching up into
the air, unhindered as Severus was on his side next to him.
Severus
swiped his tongue across the pierced flesh before replying again. “And for some
reason that thought is making me harder than ever before,” he thrust against
Ron to slam the point home.
“Oh god,”
Ron arched again. “I… you… say you belong to me.”
Severus was
surprised that he didn’t hesitate. He was surprised because he couldn’t have if
he’d wanted to. “I belong to you,” he whispered, and abandoned the nipple in
favour of Ron’s lips.
The kiss
they shared was calmer than the first ones on the bed; it was tender and
probing, testing out their newfound claims. As they broke off for air, Ron
arched off the bed yet again and hissed, “I need you inside me.”
“Want or
need?” Severus closed his eyes and kissed over his shoulder.
“Need,” Ron
said firmly.
Severus wasn’t
going to push any further because he knew what was pulsing through his own
veins was dangerously close to need as well. He released his hold on Ron and
looked around for his wand, but realised he’d dropped it on the floor watching
the chains. He reached instead for the bedside table’s drawer and drew out a
jar which was cool beneath his fingers.
He
unscrewed it and slid his fingers into the unnaturally cool gel-like substance,
coating them thoroughly. Ron, for some reason, preferred it when it was cold,
he got a kick from the sensation which Severus didn’t understand, but was
perfectly happy to indulge. He pressed one finger to the hot entrance and
smiled at the hiss which met him.
“I love it
when you use this stuff,” Ron confirmed for him, drawing his knees up and
dragging his hips off the bed for easier access.
Severus
spent a few minutes lazily fingering the tight hole before adding a second
finger. Ron was hissing further words of encouragement down the mattress and
every time he said ‘fuck’ and Severus’ own name, it was like a rush of extra
blood to Severus’ own erection.
Three
fingers deep inside his husband, Severus felt a surge of impatience flow
through him. But when need came into play, he also knew that meant his husband
needed it to be hard and fast. And Severus wasn’t going to hurt him through
shoddy preparation.
“Please
just get.in.me.” Ron growled, rising up in his
anxiety to be filled.
To shut up
him and appease him, Severus slid the fingers out to the tips, before ramming
them inward again to the spot he knew was lurking. The cry swallowed by the
room was another strain on his cock and Severus found himself panting all of a
sudden. He repeated the action, spreading the fingers out to complete his task.
He then withdrew
his fingers completely, leaving Ron whimpering at the elimination of the sensation
of being miraculously full. He loved being filled by Severus, whether by his
fingers, his dick, his tongue, anything. Ron never felt more alive than he did
at those moments.
So when
Severus nudged against him, in position before Ron realised he had moved, he
could almost have come with the delight at what was about to happen. He’d done
that before, too, and Severus had had to hide his flattered shock. Ron had
never told him he’d failed and that seeing him look so utterly thrilled and
surprised at his own bodily power nearly prompted another orgasm.
Ron
welcomed the shaft into his back passage by relaxing as much as he could, and
as soon as he felt the gentle nudge of balls upon balls he let his legs fold
over Severus’ and revelled at the touch of smooth hands on his hips.
Kneeling
down with his cock snugly buried, Severus was undoubtedly the one in control.
He angled to hit deep from the off and couldn’t hide his pleasure at the fact
that he soon had Ron panting, beyond rigid, and begging soft pleas for more.
“What do
you want?” Severus gripped the hips he held tighter, forcing them into the bed.
“Faster,”
Ron thought it best to stick to one word commands.
Severus
complied and pounded his hips back and forth in an unyielding rhythm which made
his thighs burn with the effort, but the hot tightness sheathing his erection
made it worthwhile.
“And I want
it harder,” Ron swallowed, head falling back as that need, too, was fulfilled.
With each
slam, Severus heard his own breath become far more ragged, felt his fingers
grip tighter on the skin which they would surely bruise. Ron didn’t seem to
care, he never did. He wouldn’t even care when he woke up the next morning with
purple splotches across his hips. Whatever they looked like would never be
miserable enough to negate the sheer ecstasy he experienced as he received
them.
“Oh fuck
yes,” Severus’ eyes drank in the sight of the wanton body beneath him, hands
gripping the sheets around them, stomach tensing with each thrust. “Come for
me,” he hissed, before curling down his spine and flicking his tongue in and
out of Ron’s navel.
“Not yet,”
Ron groaned, bucking slightly to meet his thrust. “Not yet… want more… want you
first…”
Severus
returned upright and reached his hand to grip Ron’s erection, pumping it whilst
enjoying the view. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” the endearments tumbled from
his lips with his last ounce of verbal restrain. “I love you so much, I –oh
fuck it,” he pounded harder into the arse beneath him. “Don’t ever leave me
because I can’t live without you, this…” his thighs were burning a riot act for
their over-use, but the angle he was achieving was so heavenly, for both of
them, that he couldn’t stop.
Ron choked
on the next words he tried to say as his prostate was hit once and again in
quick succession, rendering him mute apart from the gasps. The fingers
massaging his erection were working him into a state of completion, gripping
the shaft, teasing the head, slowly, slowly sliding
his foreskin about in a way which should be made illegal.
“I’m going to…” he gasped, but was distracted by the high cry which tore out of
his husband, and he looked up to see Severus tilt his head back, eyes closed,
his body shuddering as Ron instantly felt the sticky heat within him.
Severus
agitatedly bit into his lip; the release had caught him by surprise and he felt
fifty kinds of confused as the burn wracked him, making his body shudder. He
pumped out into the small space and almost wanted to cry as the beautiful
tingling began to leave his shaft too quickly for his liking. Swallowing, he
realised he still had hold of a rock hard extremity, and squeezed, his thumb
rising to circle over the sensitive flesh, as though it would hold in the come
it aimed to draw out.
“Fuck!” the
desperate whisper dragged him out of the darkness and he looked at Ron, staring
down between them, watching as his orgasm left him in sticky, curiously
multiplied-in-volume clumps.
Severus
realised what he was looking at, what was streaming over his hand as Ron
continued to raise his hips on the bed.
“Oh god make it stop,” Ron panted nonsensically, even though he
wanted no such thing to happen, because it was simply amazing. “Oh God Severus…
I don’t.. I don’t get it… ah shit, Ohhhhhhhh.”
He actually cried out as his cock finally seemed sated.
He finally
stopped thrusting and coming, leaving both of them staring in shock at the
white ropes of come that seemed to have expelled everywhere. Severus’ throat was dry all of a sudden but he couldn’t
help but quell the excitement rising within him, an excitement he saw mirrored
within Ron’s shocked face, looking down at the mess.
“That was…”
Severus breathed, shifting backwards out of Ron. “That was something very
similar to how it used to be, Ron… before…”
“Don’t say
it,” Ron’s voice was choked. “Don’t.”
Severus
obeyed his plea and reached for Ron’s wand, which was the first thing he could
see. He clumsily vanished every last drop of mess away
and flopped down next to his husband, taking him up in aching arms and tangling
his aching legs with their counterparts. The chain on his wrist was giving off pleasant
warmth.
He pulled
Ron’s face into his shoulder and kissed his ear softly. Neither of them said
anything as their heartbeats began to slow, but despite the late hour, sleep
didn’t come to them as it usually would. Ron’s head was swimming with thoughts
and possibilities.
“What do
you think?” He whispered finally, pulling up so he could be nose-to-nose with
Severus.
“I honestly
don’t know what to think. I know what I’d like to hope…”
“But what
does it mean?” Ron frowned.
“If the
magic in the bracelets has repaired whatever damage the curse did to your balls
and what they can produce, then… your sperm count would be back up. And maybe fertile again.”
Both of
them thought back to the day when the hospital results had arrived proclaiming
what they’d both already known –that the little amount that came out of Ron
during sex wasn’t fertile and would probably never be, because his insides were
properly damaged. Scorched, more accurately.
“Might have
just been a one off,” Ron said quietly, refusing to let his imagination run
away with him.
“And it
might not have been,” Severus couldn’t deny his hope. If it was as they were
hoping, then it might not be such a far cry to imagine that he and Ron could
father a child made up of their own genes. But he wasn’t going to mention that
now. “We’ll not know until the next time, eh? Let’s just go to sleep.”
Ron nodded
and swung off the bed to stand up, pulling back the covers and shaking out his
pillows to check for eight-legged intruders. Severus had long since stopped
passing comment on the bedtime ritual.
With the
lights off and wrapped tightly together again, Severus whispered, “I very much
liked my anniversary present, Ron.”
“Good,” Ron
laughed against the skin of his neck. “I’m glad. Cost me a fucking fortune.”
***
Severus
rose early, with the light, feeling rested despite his late night activities.
He crept out of their bedroom, carrying his clothes for after his shower, and
closed the door quietly behind him; leaving Ron sprawled ungracefully like a
starfish in their bed. Severus always wondered how Ron sensed he was gone to
automatically assume that position.
Once in the
spacious bathroom, he opened the window and looked out at the sunny May morning
which greeted him. He quickly turned on the shower and stepped in, closing his
eyes as the water dampened his hair. He reached for the shampoo and a glint on
his left wrist caught his eye and made him smile. The metal was so precious he
knew it wouldn’t tarnish in the water, would never snap from his body as the
links would never break under force. He surprised himself, as he lathered his
longer-than-ever hair, by dreamily considering all that the bond meant, rather
than hysterically reacting to it in the first instance he’d had in private
since the magic’s inception. He couldn’t deny that Ron’s thought of extra
protection comforted him.
If such an
incident on the bike were to happen again, the magic in the chain would repair
the vital parts of Ron before his life was threatened, as long as nothing
bigger than the magic trounced him first. Twisted
metal might count as bigger. Shaking the thought of his husband smeared
across tarmac from his head, Severus reached for the shower gel next and
smothered it across his body in wide, lathering circles as the scent rose up to
him. It was a warm, ambery scent, rich yet subtle at
the same time. It reminded him of the same potency of a beautifully roasted cup
of coffee.
He
swallowed at that and sped up, thinking of what would await him when he was
finished what he was planning. Ron had bought him the chain as an anniversary
present and Severus was left looking wanting in comparison. So he fully planned
to surprise him with breakfast in bed, an outrageously large and expensive bunch
of flowers and tickets to the next Cannons versus Harpies match. He’d had the
tickets for a week, he’d been going to impart them on the night of their
anniversary –but Severus could never understand his husband’s affection for the
useless team. He didn’t quite see how giving two tickets to a match, which
would likely only last half an hour whilst the chasers attempted solely not to
fall off their brooms, equated to a decent present. More like a pity offering. Severus snorted and turned off the
shower, reaching for a towel. They could argue forever about Quidditch, and how
Ron hated that Severus seemed to change his team for the start of each season,
though overall agreed with Ginny that the Holyhead Harpies were the best team
in the league.
Drying
himself thoroughly, Severus grinned at what Ron would say when Severus had insisted
on buying tickets for the middle of the ground and not at the Cannons end of
the pitch. He could almost hear the vitriol then and there. But as a Harpies
supporter, Severus wasn’t going to be stupid enough wander into the lion’s den
and find himself accidentally cheering when the
Cannons lost spectacularly. That was somewhat like suicide. They’d sit in the middle
and he’d walk out of the stadium alive.
The flowers
would be a test of sorts. Severus really couldn’t gauge how Ron would react to
them. He thought back to the one solitary flower he’d sent in his life and how
the recipient had been utterly thrilled. Remus
is pleased with everything though, perpetually happy to receive anything.
Severus
pulled his jumper over his head and groaned in realisation that he’d picked up
one of Ron’s instead. It was huge and baggy, hooded, far too young for him. But
at least it was black. Ron’s scent swirled around him and seeing as he was
alone, Severus allowed himself a moment of indulgence as he put the hood up
over his hair (dried by wand) and sank into the thick cotton, marvelling in
both the smell and the comforting warmth. He caught sight of himself in the
mirror and almost laughed at how ridiculous he looked, and shoved the hood back
down. His hair sat awkwardly on the bunched material at the nape of his neck
and he sighed, reaching for a hair band sat on the cistern.
You look like a knob when you tie
your hair back. Like mutton dressed up as lamb.
Severus
looked at himself in the mirror, and arranged his hair backward so that a few
strands purposefully fell around his ears, shielding them from view. He fixed
the band in place and sighed. His hair matched the length of Ron’s eldest
brother, who was now over thirty, but Severus would never understand how they
could look so different. He looked in the mirror and all he saw was an old man
in young man’s clothes with a stupidly adolescent hairstyle.
But Ron always says that I don’t
look forty. That I’m closer to thirty. So I should be
able to pull this off.
Sighing, he
made his way into the hallway and crept into his boots, and as he zipped them
up George padded out of the living room looking hopefully at the door.
“Yes, but only if you’re quiet,” Severus pointedly looked at the closed bedroom
door.
George
eagerly, but silently, bounded up to the hooks by the door and pawed at his
lead which hung there with a playfulness that made Severus laugh. He unhooked
it and clipped it onto the dog’s collar, letting it fall as he doubled back
into the kitchen in search of his wallet and keys. He located them both on the
island unit near the door and shoved them into his jeans, before looking round
and seeing George prancing excitedly by the door, holding the end of his own
lead in his mouth.
“Oh you
silly mutt,” Severus snorted, and reached down to tug it out from between his
teeth, nose wrinkling as the dog spit transferred to his fingers.
He tugged
open the door quietly and stepped out into the weak morning sunshine, George
immediately tugged on his lead, paws coming off the floor in his eagerness for
a walk.
Severus
didn’t really know how he’d been the one that ended up walking George the most.
Ron loved doing it, and he often volunteered, but somehow between them, Severus
and George found each other the best company for the job. Probably because Ron
got bored too quickly, and often turned back before George wanted to, causing a
battle of iron wills. Severus, on the other hand, was much more patient and
content to walk until the dog decided he’d had enough, satisfied to wander in
his own thoughts, or appreciate the view.
They walked
in silence; Severus noticed there was dew collecting on the toes of his boots
as he marched along the grass path to the road. Dear lord. You’ve been reading too many of Remus’ rubbish romance
novels. You would never have noticed something like that without them.
Severus
fought down his grin. Remus had dared him to make his way through a pile of
Jane Austen classics, knowing full well that Severus wouldn’t refuse the dare
but would hate every single minute of it. Full of flapping, silly girls (he at
least agreed with the father in Pride and Prejudice, if anything). So far the
books had done absolutely nothing for Severus except to assert the reasons
quite why he had ended up married to another man.
Another man
warm in bed, curled in their sheets, body heated and forever wanting. Severus
was tempted to turn around and dive straight back into it with him, as
beautiful as the day was. Retirement did bore him, however much as he enjoyed
it. He was used to being busy, always brewing, always performing duties, and he
found himself woefully without. So the house was always spotless, and they were
never without anything. He’d even taken to trying to learn Spanish as a welcome
reprieve from monotony, prompting them to book a hotel in Barcelona for September. Neither of them had
ever been and this time, their holiday would be one hundred percent alone
without any other Weasleys.
“Morning!”
Came a cheerful voice, and Severus jerked out of his reverie and looked up,
seeing one of the nearby local farmers strolling up the lane in his
wellingtons, a paper beneath his arm and a bottle of milk in his hand. “It’s a
good ‘un.”
Severus
smiled at him and nodded his agreement.
He wasn’t
quite sure he was ever going to get used to the friendly nature of the
villagers that lived with them. Where he’d grown up, nobody spoke in the
streets unless it was to shout and complain at one another. But here people
were always calling out greetings, barging into conversations in shops,
inviting others in for tea. Severus had made himself look a complete idiot on
the day they’d moved in by being so quiet and reserved, and if Ron hadn’t been
there to save the situation, Severus was sure that they’d never have ended up
so welcome.
Ron was a
hit with all the older ladies in the village. Severus loved to tease him and
call him the Old Lady Whisperer, which often earned him a smack round the head.
But Ron cheerfully collected the papers of those unable to make it to the shop
and ran other small shopping errands for them, always turning down their offers
of payment and only ever taking their tea. Severus wondered when the time had
passed that he would have snorted at the idea of a good deed simply for a good
deed’s sake.
He’d
certainly never experienced many before he’d met Ron. But his husband had a big
heart, he was still learning quite how big. He’d had an inkling of just how big when they’d been walking from
the pub one day and found a girl, who couldn’t have been more than six, crying
because somebody had trodden on a slug she’d found interesting that morning.
Severus had watched with bemusement as Ron had got down on his knees and buried
the slug in the grass for her. She’d bounded off smiling by the end of the
encounter and Severus was left incredulous at Ron’s compassion, which seemed to
have blossomed out of him since leaving Hogwarts and his Prefect position
behind.
They
rounded the corner into the heart of the village, and George instantly yapped
at the ducks floating in the pond, making them ruffle their feathers
indignantly.
“Stop
terrorising them,” Severus sighed, reining him in a little. “A brutal aquatic
fowl murder in the middle of the road would simply slaughter our reputation.”
George
looked up at him and let his tongue loll out of his mouth.
“I don’t
care how tasty you think they’d be. Somewhat different from the shredded duck
from the Chinese, you’d be in for a massive shock-”
“Morning!”
Another cheery voice called, and he looked up to see Marjorie, the baker’s
wife, putting out the board in front of her shop. “And where on earth are you
off to at this time of the morning?”
“To see you, actually,” Severus said quietly with a smile. As well as their own
overt cheerfulness, he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to interact with them
without feeling like a total goon.
He hovered
in the doorway whilst George sniffed the air hopefully, smelling what the
bakery might have offer him if he looked sweet enough.
“The usual m’love?”
“If by the
usual you mean a loaf of bread and half of your croissant stock then yes,
please,” Severus replied, wishing his husband had less of an appetite –it made
them stand out even more than they already did.
But the
plump woman just laughed and picked up some tongs. “Not long out of the oven
these, so they’re lovely and fresh.”
“Best you’ll get without going to France,” Severus flattered her,
tugging George back where he’d crept over the threshold.
She grinned
at him and caught him craning his head to check to see if the tiny village
florist was open yet. The lights were on.
“Oh dear,
you boys haven’t had an argument, have you? Breakfast,
flowers? Don’t you know your scandal will be all over the village faster
than cider over the floor at the annual summer fling?” She asked.
And that had
been another thing. Severus knew the muggle world wasn’t as accepting as
homosexuality as the wizarding one, and he had expected a certain amount of
animosity, maybe even complete shunning. But it seemed not. The quiet folk of
the village just seemed to take it in their stride and welcomed them with open
arms, treating them like regulars in the pub from the off.
“No,”
Severus assured her. “An anniversary, actually.”
“Oh, congratulations!” She beamed. “How long have you been together?”
“Two
years,” Severus replied warily –they might be accepting, but he didn’t want to
push the limits.
“Don’t look
so scared,” she laughed, placing everything in a carrier bag and ringing up the
till. “Happiness is happiness, don’t you think? There’s fifteen years between
me and himself,” she jerked her head at the back room.
“Just a number and all that.”
Severus
paid and thanked her, taking the bag she brought over to him at the door,
before she dropped to her knees and produced a sausage roll on the flat of her
hand. George snarfed it in one
gulp. Takes
after his bloody father in his eating habits.
Back out on
the quiet road he waved at the owner of the newsagents and headed to the
florists, pushing the door open with a little tinkle.
“I’m
closed!” Came the call before the woman stood up with her hands full of gypsophalia. “Oh. I’m not closed for you,” she winked with
harmless flirt that reminded Severus an awful lot of Tonks. “What brings you
here?”
Severus
hated that he blushed. He really hated doing anything like this. “Last time I
checked people who came into florists wanted flowers,” he smiled.
She laughed
at his dry reply and set down what she was holding. “Ron doesn’t seem like the
flowers type of man?”
“Guess
we’ll find out. Can you make me the most sickeningly girly bunch of flowers you
can?” Severus snorted, shifting the bag from the bakers which George was trying
to paw his way into.
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