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It Was Supposed to be Over	By : nmos Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 4436 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything associated with HP/i do not make money from this.

Chapter List
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Chapter 1

Severus Snape lay on the floor of the Shrieking Shack, where he had been for almost two hours of agonizing pain, as Nagini's venom worked through his system. He could tell, though, that his misery would soon be coming to an end. He had known for a long time that he would die in the war, and was glad for a way out of his miserable excuse of a life. Years, months, weeks, days, hours seemed hopelessly long when there was nothing to fill them with but playing pawn for Dumbledore and the Dark Lord and, occasionally, reading on borrowed time.

There had been no point in trying to befriend a colleague or starting some research in potions when it would have only made it more difficult to accept his fate. So, he had made it incredibly easy to accept. He had made his life so miserable and empty that he had longed for death since before the Dark Lord had turned up under the turban of the DADA professor.

Loneliness could be an incredibly consuming feeling. After knowing the feeling of being casually touched on the shoulder, or smiled at, or cared about, it was hard to get used to going without affection. Snape thought he had read somewhere that human beings eventually go insane without physical contact with other humans and vaguely wondered how much longer he could have lasted.

Severus gritted his teeth and smiled against the pain that was now becoming numb: there was no use wondering that now; the one thing he had been looking forward to for longer than he even realized was quickly approaching. "Yes!" Severus croaked into the silence of the deserted house, as he breathed his last.

Suddenly everything was gone; the numbness, the gentle pressure of the nail from the floor board on his shoulder, the faint buzzing that he had started to imagine. All that was left was a strange warmth and darkness. "What is this place?" Snape wondered. He had never really known what to expect from death. He had assumed that he would not be in a cognitive state; that he would simply cease to be.

He certainly did not believe in any god or gods that would provide an afterlife of sorts for the souls of the dead and magic could only go so far. Even if he were in some sort of afterlife, shouldn't he be in hell? A chilling thought came over him. Maybe this was hell. Maybe he would continue to be alone in the dark for eternity. The emptiness, he mused, would certainly be worse than the Dante-esque picture of people swimming in seas of wrath, and pushing boulders up and down hills.

A pin-point of green light appeared in the distance. 'Curious,' thought Severus. Thinking over his options, he decided to head for the only thing different in the monotony of darkness.

__________

The war had ended a week ago and Hermione Granger had done nothing but attend funeral after funeral. While in hiding and hunting Horcruxes Hermione had longed for the time after the war. She had dreamt of proper showers, proper meals, sitting her N.E.W.T.s and getting started with her life, whatever that might entail. However, she had not fully thought through the losses and despair the war would bring.

Hermione had shut down after the last curse was sent. All of the pain that she had been carrying with her throughout the battle seemed to catch up with her and its magnitude overwhelmed her. Of course, Dumbledore's death before they had left should have forewarned her to how much each loss would hurt. But as soon as Dumbledore had died, there had at least been a purpose that was more important. They had to kill the Horcruxes. They had to make sure his death was not in vain. They had to keep going because there was no time to stop and feel.

Now, however, things were different. She had never before realized just how many minutes were packed into a week. She had only bathed once since the final battle. In the cold shower, she had scrubbed off every bit of dirt and dried blood until her skin was raw-looking and red. She had only eaten when Molly Weasley practically force-fed her chicken broth. Her mind had not once wandered from the horrors she had seen on the battlefield and the friends and good people that had been lost. N.E.W.T.s and starting life in the midst of so much death seemed ludicrous.

One thing she did know was that she couldn't sit around the Weasleys' house much longer radiating depression when their loss so outweighed hers. She should not have been the one that had to be comforted over the past week. Molly and Arthur should have been comforted for their loss of a son, the rest for the loss of a brother, a twin. She had to leave.

Tying back her now greasy hair, she gathered some of her belongings, made her trunk a more manageable size, and stuffed it in a pocket of her robes. There was one more funeral to go to, and then she would leave. She figured that she would move back home, although her parents weren't there anymore.

Eventually she would try to find them, but she had no idea where to start looking. Remus Lupin had kept the information of where her parents were hidden, and had told his wife, Tonks, so that in the event of his death someone would know. Lupin had most likely thought that Tonks would stay out of the battle for Teddy's sake. However, she had probably assumed the same of him. So Hermione would have to start from scratch and hope she could find them.

Hermione headed down stairs. The Weasleys and Harry were assembling in the front hall to leave for this last funeral. When Mr. Weasley saw her approach the group, he looked around at everyone.

"Well, we best get going now," Arthur sighed. The family grabbed hold of the baseball glove in Arthur's hand, and was transported to the gate outside Hogwarts. Hagrid was at the gate, letting people in. He smiled sadly at the group, and patted a few of them, at random, on the back as they headed through.

Severus Snape's funeral was last for a couple reasons. First, it had taken a while for the bureaucracy of the Ministry to accept Snape's innocence from the memories Harry had turned over to them. Second, and perhaps this was the saddest part, as the Ministry was just expected to have their heads up their asses, was that after the Ministry had accepted his innocence it had taken the rest of the week for someone to retrieve his body from the Shack and organize a small funeral. With the exception of the Weasleys, Harry, and Hermione, only the teaching staff was seated in the rows of benches arranged on the grounds.

After everyone was seated, Minerva said a few words about Snape's bravery and his monumental part in the downfall of Voldemort. No one really knew him well enough to say anything other than his accomplishments in the war. After Minerva retook her seat, everyone remained in silence, staring at the coffin as they thought about the man who none of them had appreciated in life. Hermione felt a pang of guilt as she recalled watching her professor die on the floor of the Shrieking Shack. Maybe there would have been one less funeral if she had thought to cast some healing spells or perhaps carry a bezoar. However, at the time she had only thought to conjure a vial to store his memories in. Really, they hadn't even had the decency to put him out of his misery. Who knows how long he had lain on the floor, paralyzed with pain, before finally dying.

Hermione suddenly felt sick.

__________

Eventually, everyone had gotten up from the benches and awkwardly conversed for a few minutes. Offering condolences seemed to be the way silences were filled these days. As the Weasleys started for the gate with Harry and Hermione behind, Hermione knew that it was time to leave. Turning to Harry, she touched his arm to get his attention.

"Harry, I need you to do me a favor. I'm going home. I know it's cowardly, but I need to be alone for a while. And eventually I'll also need to start looking for my parents. Could you let the Weasleys know that I'm very grateful for the comfort they've given me over the past week, and apologize that I couldn't tell them that I'm leaving to their faces?"

Harry nodded. "I understand, Mione. Be careful, and be in touch. Molly won't let you stay holed up in that house alone for too long."

"I know," she said, and gave a small, halfhearted smile at his comment. As she turned to walk in the opposite direction of the Weasleys she had a thought. The Weasleys were walking toward the gate of Hogwarts, but perhaps she could apparate home from Hogsmeade if she used the secret passage under the Whomping Willow. Sprinting in the direction of the old tree, which had also been a casualty of the war, she felt a wave of adrenaline wash over her. As she reached the passage way she held her hands out in front of her, both to brace her sudden stop and to touch the knot that would open the secret passage. After running all the way through to the end of the passage, she abruptly stopped. She had forgotten that this particular passage would take her to Hogsmeade via the Shrieking Shack.

Hermione looked up the stairs to the room in which she had watched Professor Snape die. Slowly, carefully, as if the Professor might still be in the room waiting to scold her and take away house points for disrupting him, she climbed the stairs and pushed open the door. There were still blood stains on the floor. The professor had probably been left there with his blood soaking the wood for too long for even magic to remove them.

Gingerly approaching the stains, Hermione knelt beside them and finally wept. She cried for the feeling of emptiness inside her; she cried for her missing parents; she cried for her parents' dead guardians; she cried for the Weasleys; but most of all she cried for the dead man that everyone had forgotten.

_______
AN: Hi. this is my first fan fic. but it's okay if you think it's horrible. just tell me what i should change, because i have no experience at all. you can also let me know if you don't think it's horrible :)

6/13 This is now being beta read by Carolib. so, thanks so much to her for helping me fix this chapter up.
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It Was Supposed to be Over