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Love, Free as Air	By : Lomonaaeren Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 32703 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and I am not making any money from this story.

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Chapter Fifteen�Teaching the Way

�� Draco had thought that the rich
colors of the flowers, the deep shade, and the soft paths of the garden might
soothe him. This was the part of the physical house he had missed the most when
he was living with Potter. Grimmauld Place had no garden to speak of, and
Draco�s time had been consumed with things rather more important than planting.

�� But it didn�t matter how long he
stood under a tree, barely breathing, rocking back and forth on his feet as he
listened to the wind in the branches, or how long he stared into the heart of a
flower and tried to see only the blue. Different thoughts pressed on his brain
and pinched down like a wasp devouring a spider.

�� How
can they ask me to choose?

�� The one thing Draco knew was that he
could not have everything he needed or wanted. Time with Severus, someone to
tell him what to do, and making love with Severus again were on one side.
Spending time with Potter, trying to understand the confusing mixture of
gratitude and irritation and attraction that brewed in his stomach like
fireworks when he thought of Potter, and making decisions on his own without
pressure from Severus were on the other side.

�� I
reckon it doesn�t matter what I do, I�ll have pressure no matter what, Draco
thought, and sat down on a stone bench to sulk.

�� When he didn�t have an audience,
though, there was only so much sulking he could do. The impulse ran out and
left him memorizing the contours of a knot on the tree trunk in front of him,
despair and rage alternating with dread of humiliation.

�� Both
of them will try to force me to make decisions. Can I go with the one that
causes less pain?

�� Then he shook his head. That was the
way he had tried to live with Severus, snatching the crumbs of attention he
absolutely needed and leaving him alone the rest of the time, because most of
their encounters ended in pain. But he could live like that no longer, and it
didn�t matter who asked him to. He had to
have some freedom, some room to breathe, and time.

�� Maybe, he slowly decided, the best
way to do that was to go back and present that list of demands to Potter and
Severus, then live with whoever could promise him the most of it. He wouldn�t
get his decisions made or escape any other way.

�� When he stepped back into the
drawing room, he could immediately tell something was wrong. Severus and Potter
still occupied their seats, and they still had tea in their cups. No one had
touched the cup Draco had abandoned, in fact, though usually Severus was
finicky about cleaning up dishes the moment someone stopped using them. But the
air was full of a tense and secret excitement, and Potter and Severus avoided
each other�s eyes in a new way.

�� Draco stared. It almost seemed�it almost seemed�

�� That
was the way Severus and I looked at each other after the first time we kissed.
Or the way Potter avoided my eyes after the kiss I gave him.

�� But it was ridiculous, Draco
reassured himself as he made his way back to his seat. They were both here
because they were both attracted to or bound to him. There was no other tie they had in common, and therefore no
way that they could be sharing what he thought they had.

�� His spine still prickled as he
settled into his seat, though, and he clutched the teacup harder than he
should, nearly enough to put a crack down the side. He shoved it away after
that and took a deep breath. �Have you considered your answers to my
questions?� he asked.

�� I thought you were the one who had
to think,� Potter said, with a piercing glance at him.

�� Yes,� Draco said, sitting up. He
had forgotten how much glances like those irritated him. �I need freedom, room,
and time. I don�t need anyone shoving me to make decisions right away or
controlling my every move. Severus, do you think you can give me that?� He
turned around and tried his haughtiest stare. It was already different that
Severus had left the teacup where it was and hadn�t tried to force himself into
the mini-conversation between Draco and Potter. Perhaps this could work.

�� Severus considered him somberly, the
way he would an experimental potion that had collapsed for no known reason, and
then folded one hand on his knee. �Potter and I have been considering a
different solution,� he said.

�� Potter
and I. Draco had heard him use the phrase before, but never without a
sneer. He sat up, shoulders all but vibrating with the tension. Something was
very wrong here. Something had happened while he was gone. Had Potter and
Severus already begun to plan
something new behind his back, something that meant he wouldn�t have the chance
to do as he liked?

�� What?� he snapped, and then drew
his breath in and tried to look and act as calm as he could. He wasn�t going to
give Severus more room to cast accusations of being childish at him, and he
wanted to show Potter that he could stand up to his lover and that a decision
to come� back home was not a mistake. �I
mean, what have you been considering?� he asked, and he thought he was
incredibly kind and tolerant in tone.

�� Me staying here to help you and
Snape,� Potter said. �To mediate between you and make sure that you have what
you need. And Snape��

�� Severus, I think you should call
me,� Severus interrupted.

�� Draco reeled back against the couch
and stared at them both. This was so far outside his ordinary experience that
his head ached, and he wasn�t sure how he should go about clearing it or
helping to decrease his confusion.

�� Severus,� Potter said with an
agreeable tilt of his head, �kissed me.�

�� Draco sat still, because there was
no other response to that declaration that he could make. Then he said, not
even recognizing his voice because it was so low and ugly, �You seem to attract
that sort of thing, don�t you?�

�� Yes,� Potter said. �At least this
time I was able to give a better answer, now that I�ve admitted I might want to
date a man.�

�� Draco rose to his feet. He was dizzy
with pain and panic, but determined not to show it. �I reckon I�d better leave,
then,� he said. �If you don�t mind. I
wish you every joy of each other, Severus. Potter.� He made a little bow. His
mother had once told him to be graceful no matter what he did, because Malfoys
always were.

�� Sit down before you fall down,�
Potter said. �You look as if you�re going to faint any moment, you know. What
Severus means is that we�d all try dating each other at once. You and him,
assuming you want to. He and I. Me and you.�

�� One of my requirements will be that
you learn better grammar, Potter,� Severus murmured, compressing his lips with
a dainty expression.

�� Draco shook his head, but he did
sink back into the chair. �You�re talking about a threesome,� he said. �You
could at least use the word.�

�� I didn�t really know the word,�
Potter said, which made Draco rapidly reconsider how much sexual experience he
really had. �But yes, I could. That�s what we�ll have if you�ll agree. But it
depends on your choice. I know that you wanted to come back to Sn�Severus, and
you can do that if you wish. But there�s no reason that you have to date me if
you find me too controlling, or too demanding, or too�I don�t know what other
reason there would be, but I�m sure there is one.�

�� Draco scowled. �You�re making it
sound as if it was solely my choice not to date you,� he muttered. �There are
other reasons, and you know what they are.�

�� Potter shook his head. �Not all of
them. What I�m trying to say is that we don�t want to force you into a
decision, but if you�ll agree to live in the house with both of us, at least
that way we would be in the same place with you.�

�� Draco scowled at him again, and then
scowled at Severus. �What were you thinking?�
he demanded. He reckoned he could understand if Potter had kissed Severus
first, at least if he posited some unnatural and subdued attraction, but there
was no reason under the sun that Severus ought to have kissed Potter. The man
Draco had known, or thought he knew, was too logical, careful, and controlled
to have done so. �What did you really want from him? Did you think he�d agree
to this?�

�� Severus�s eyes were carefully blank.
�I had no idea what would happen,� he said. �But your leaving made me see that
I cannot stay the same. I wanted to take a risk. If it failed, I would be no
worse off than before, and if it succeeded, it would change my life. Then I must be different. It would reduce the
chance that I would merely sink back into mindless routine if you chose to join
me again.�

�� Draco sighed. Severus�s logic did
have a sort of twisted sense, though his usual method was to leave his bridges
in place rather than light fires under them. �Why did you choose such a
Gryffindor way of doing that, though?�

�� Was that a Gryffindor way?� Severus
studied him with a keen gaze. �I thought of it simply as a way that would work.
I prefer not to give the names of Hogwarts Houses to courses of action. A Gryffindor
as well as a Slytherin can be cunning, and a Slytherin as well as a Gryffindor
can be brave.�

�� Great,
now he manages to make me sound like the unreasonable one.

�� Draco turned back to Potter. �You
must see that this can�t work,� he said, a little desperately. He had felt so
panicked and driven two hours ago that he had been sure he would walk back into
the house and Potter and Severus would both shake their heads at him
simultaneously. He had never imagined that he
would seem like the only sane one in a world of madmen. �You can�t stay
here with us.�

�� If you say no, I can�t,� Potter
said. �But Sn�Severus has invited me.�

�� Draco stared. He tried to imagine
how well Potter and Severus would get along, and couldn�t. He tried to imagine
this arrangement lasting more than three days without self-destructing, and
couldn�t. He tried to imagine making love to both Potter and Severus at once.

�� That was disturbingly easy to see in
his mind�s eye.

�� I don�t know what to do,� he said.

�� Well, that�s no different from what
you felt a while ago, is it?� Potter asked encouragingly. �You need to make one
decision at a time. Do you want me to live here or not? That�s the first one.�

�� Draco closed his eyes. He couldn�t
imagine it, perhaps, but then again, he hadn�t been able to imagine that his
life with Severus would end like it had, either. Perhaps the best solution
would be simply to step off the cliff and live through what would come rather
than trying to anticipate it.

�� I want you to live here,� he said
mechanically. �Or, at least, I don�t want to oppose Severus�s invitation.�

�� He heard Potter stand up, but he
refused to open his eyes. He would be profoundly embarrassed by what he would
see in Potter�s face, he thought, and Potter should feel the same way.

�� Thank you,� Potter murmured, close
to his ear. �I know that this was hard for you to allow, and we pressed you
further than you wanted to be pressed, but you made the decision anyway, and
that�s the important thing.�

�� His hand fluttered across Draco�s jaw,
and his lips touched the skin behind Draco�s ear for a brief second. Draco
could feel his jaw dropping in astonishment. He hadn�t given permission for
Potter to do that! He hadn�t thought Potter, compassionate and considerate as
he was, would ever dare snatch a kiss without permission.

�� But he had, and now he was turning
to Severus and saying, �Where are those rooms that you said I could have? I�ll
need to go back to my house to fetch some things, of course, but I�ll be taking
them.�

�� Severus rustled towards the right
corridor and explained something to Potter, but Draco didn�t hear it. His
heartbeat had taken over instead. He licked his lips, stood still, and waited
until he was virtually sure that Potter had left the room, either to find the
rooms that Severus had given him�without Draco�s permission�or to find the
Apparition point.

�� Then he turned around and opened his
eyes. �Why did you do that?� he asked Severus. �The truth.�

*

�� Severus suffered a mild spasm of
irritation. The problem with sudden honesty was that no one seemed to believe
him, and he had to keep explaining his choice to change as well as the facts he
was trying to convey.

�� But he had made this choice himself,
since he could have been honest before, or simply treated Draco like a human
being from the beginning and avoided all this trouble.

�� Or
perhaps I could not have. It was not easy, even now, to admit he had done
something wrong, and he could do it now only because other people were with him
who could correct him in moments if he didn�t. If he had only blank parchment
in front of him and another letter to write, he would have edited in his mind
and probably never thought that �treating Draco like a human being� was the
solution.

�� I meant what I said,� he murmured
now. �I wish to have Potter around because it is different. And the memories
that he placed in your Pensieve convinced me. He thought kindly of me long
before he had any reason to do so. I could use someone who thinks kindly of
me.�

�� Draco�s face turned white, except for
a single spot of color in each cheek. Severus stared, and then realized the
implications of his words. He shook his head. �I am sure that you think more
kindly of me than I deserve,� he said, �but you also have reasons to that
Potter does not. His sympathy was unusual, and so it caught my attention.�

�� That has nothing to do with
thinking him attractive.� Draco�s voice was low and savage.

�� Does it not?� Severus asked. �Did
my knowledge of potions make matters any different for you? My voice? You told
me once that my voice was what drew you to me when you became an adult and thus
old enough to understand your own feelings.�

�� Draco�s cheeks went from white to
red. He turned his head. �But you were never attracted to Potter in the same
way.� he muttered.

�� Not the same way,� Severus said. �This is new for me, and may not work. But
I wished to try. I want Potter�s sympathy and understanding for myself, and his
body would not be a bad trade. And I want you.�

�� Why?� Draco turned his back to him.
�If you have Potter, and you just admitted that you fully intend to fuck him,
then why would you need me?�

�� Ah.
He wants praise. Severus was glad that the problem was so easy to diagnose,
since he was familiar with the impulse.

�� He rose to his feet and walked up
behind Draco, bowing his head so that he could breathe gently out on his ear.
Draco twitched and hunched his shoulders, but relaxed them in the next instant,
as though long-ingrained instinct was taking over from his conscious repulsion.
Severus smiled. Yes, he could still use his breath alone to seduce Draco. He
wondered what it would take to seduce Potter, and then put the notion out of
his mind for now. He should be concentrating on Draco alone.

�� Because you offer me things that he
cannot,� Severus said softly. �Greater knowledge. Greater familiarity with the
life I have led. Greater understanding that comes from having experienced the
same things yourself, rather than pure compassion. And a different kind of
beauty and sexual knowledge.� He rested his fingertips on Draco�s shoulder.
�Remember what and who I am. Is it strange for me to want everything I can
possess?�

�� Draco tilted his head back, his hair
brushing past his ears and falling to rest on Severus�s fingertips in the old
familiar way. Severus shivered, and then restrained himself by thinking that he
was not the only one who knew how to use his body as a tool in seduction.

�� I didn�t think about it that way.�
Draco turned his head to the side, his eyes liquid. �But�you realize that
Potter has never been with a man before? He just admitted to himself that he
was attracted to men. And he was attracted to me. How can you be sure that he�ll want to sleep with you when he
might not even find you handsome?�

�� Severus was startled into a crack of
laughter. �Draco. I know I am not handsome.
It is not facial beauty, nor bodily beauty, that earns me lovers. Unless
you lie awake at night dreaming of the way that my skin tightens around my
shoulders and the way that my knees pop when I rise from the bed.�

�� Draco�s face flamed, and Severus
paused, curious as to whether he had stumbled over a few of Draco�s secret
fantasies. But Draco simply cleared his throat and said, �What if Potter
doesn�t fantasize at all?�

�� Then this won�t work,� Severus
said. �But we do not know that yet.�

�� Draco shook his head, opened his
mouth, and then shut it again, twin lines appearing next to his mouth that said
he would never admit what he was thinking. But Severus kept his fingertips in
place and raised his eyebrows, and finally Draco bit his lip and admitted, �I
don�t know how you do it. You know that you could have made the wrong decision.
Yet you persist. How can you do that?
Why aren�t you afraid of failing and what other people will think of you for
it?�

�� Severus shook his head. �One cannot
preserve an attitude like this when testing experimental potions, Draco. If I
were afraid of failure, then I would never brew. In ordinary potions, I can
make mistakes when distracted,� he added, thinking of the Calming Draught that
he had ruined with brooding over Draco. �Now, granted, I make most of the
failures by myself, in my lab, with no one to report them. If I am mistaken in
the way that Potter might come to belong with us, then at least two other
people will know.� He met Draco�s gaze. �Potter�s Unbreakable Vow will prevent
him from talking about it, but you could.�

�� Draco�s eyes flared. Then he shut
them and turned his head away, but Severus could predict the route his mind was
running. He hadn�t thought of that particular power, and it had given him
another weapon in his arsenal, when for so long he had been helpless against
Severus, or at least felt that way.

�� Severus was glad that Draco wasn�t
looking at him, because he was not sure what his own face would have expressed.
He had emerged from six years of mindless routine, just like Draco, but he was
less sure about what would follow. He was making wild decisions, making changes
that might not work after a few minutes� thinking, instead of after long and cautious
experimentation and research. He was throwing everything he held at the wall
and hoping for a miraculous potion by sheer chance.

�� He did not know if it would work.
But he was committed to trying.

*

�� Harry glanced around the rooms that
Snape had directed him to, and felt his lips twitch. The walls were so dark
that it looked as though someone had cast a Permanent Night Charm and then
remembered to score it with lines indicating the divisions between the wooden
panels. The floor was covered with scrap paper; Harry decided that Draco might
have used this as a study once. The furniture consisted of a bed with sheets so
musty that Harry had started sneezing when he stepped through the door, a
wooden desk with a large crack down the middle of it, and a chair with one leg.

�� He Vanished the sheets, considered
the chair and decided to give it up as a bad job, and tried a few spells on the
crack in the desk. Nothing happened. Harry cocked an eyebrow and decided that
might as well go, too.

�� What
am I doing here?

�� Ron and Hermione would probably yell
that question at him. Wait, no, only Ron would. Hermione would pick up
half-a-dozen psychology books and by the end of the evening, she would be
master of all the disorders that might make someone move in with people he
didn�t know and try to live with them.

�� She
doesn�t know about Snape, or I might ask her for advice.

�� Harry sat down on the bed, with a
mental reminder to himself to check his arse for dust later, and tilted his
head back to study the ceiling. Cracking and leaking. At least this crack
responded to the Reparo he launched
at it.

�� I
don�t really know why I�m here. I don�t know what I feel for Snape or Draco,
other than the fact that I can�t stop thinking about Draco.

�� And now he wouldn�t be able to stop
thinking about Snape�or Severus, as Harry reckoned he really should call him,
based on the other man�s permission. He touched his lips and thought he still
felt the pressure of that tongue on them, though Severus had barely touched
him.

�� I
hope that Draco decides to let us live together. I want to explore this and see
what happens, although it might not be anything good.

�� He started to brood, and then heard
footsteps in the corridor outside his room. Harry stood up and put his head
around the door.

�� Draco stood there. He shone against
the dark walls in this part of the house like a beacon in the night, Harry
thought, and then shook his head to clear it. He had strange thoughts sometimes. He would have to struggle with them
until he corrected them.

�� Is something wrong?� Draco�s voice
was wary and snappish. Harry knew why. All he had seen was Harry shaking his
head. He didn�t know what the gesture was for. Perhaps it was meant to send him
away.

�� Nothing. Are you all right?� Harry
added, because he thought that would deter Draco from asking a question that he
had no idea how to answer.

�� Draco let himself be diverted,
though the way he narrowed his eyes and peered at Harry for a moment said he
wouldn�t be forgetting this. �Yes, fine. And I�ve decided that I want to stay
here with both you and Severus and see what happens.� Harry found his lips
moving in an echo of the words, so close were they to his own thoughts.
�Probably nothing good,� Draco finished, with a wise shake of his head.

�� Thank you,� Harry said. �And yes,
it might be nothing good, but this seems to be something we can do to address
all our needs and desires and wants all at once, or at least give them a chance
to emerge. Thank you,� he added a second time, because Draco didn�t seem to have
absorbed the words the first time.

�� You�re welcome.� Draco still seemed
half-puzzled.

�� Harry leaned forwards and kissed him
on the cheek, since he was the only one who hadn�t initiated a kiss yet. Draco
turned his head and opened his mouth, and Harry�s lips ended up half-brushing
his. Draco gasped, but said nothing, and stared at Harry when he smiled back
and said, �I�m going home to find some furniture.�

�� Draco was still standing there,
motionless, when Harry stepped past him and went down the stairs.

*

�� Rosalie Ayers: Thank you! I�m afraid
Draco might have displayed more reluctance than you wanted, but in the end, it
will lead him to getting everything he wants.

�� lryn: They aren�t lovers yet, but
Harry is coming around to the idea.

�� pittwitch: Thanks! That�s mostly
Chapter 16, because I wanted Draco to get a chance at a full reaction.

�� Clau: Harry doesn�t really know yet.
That�s why his attitude here is, �We�ll try it and see.� He probably thinks of
Snape more as an appendage to Draco right now.

�� RiverWhispers: Thank you! As Snape
explains here, one of the reasons he dared as much as he did is because he
fears going back to what he used to be. There�s less chance of that if Harry is
living there.

�� And if Harry can actually overcome
his reluctance and his caution, then things will start moving faster.

�� angelmuziq: Snape has literally no
one else who knows of his location or existence right now. It may be that one
of the other reasons he reached out was because he knew that Harry can�t betray
him because of the Vow.

�� DTDY; Thanks for reviewing.

�� Mia: Thanks so much! He�s much more
of a driving force now than he was. One of Harry�s good characteristics in this
story is that he releases the others from passivity.

�� W�lkchen: Harry won�t let Draco do just as he wants. Draco feels pressured
to make choices that he�s not ready to make yet, and that�s a major point of
contention in the next chapter. But I think all three of them have to learn at
once how to live with the other two.

�� Lady-Claw: Thank you for reviewing.

�� ILuvShikamaru: Sorry! The story will
only be about half that length.
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Love, Free as Air