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Weapon	By : uqui Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Voldemort Views: 105432 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 26
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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11/02/2012

Thank you to SuryaPrakash for the betaing. If there are mistakes, they are my fault.

Thank you also to everyone who reviewed. I love reviews, and I think I managed to answer them all this time so if you have questions, ask away!

Weapon LX Uncertainty is the Beginning

Remus looked up at the night sky as he tested the locks. The moon had not yet risen, but he gave a feral grin anticipating that tonight would be the last time he feared it. Gideon was with him, but the Death Eater werewolf was keeping his distance. While Remus had kept his word, Gideon was still a bit skittish about being with someone who he expected to turn him in. It had been a challenge to keep the Death Eater undetected, but Lupin was a man of his word and as soon as the full moon was over they would leave for the Gathering.

He would have liked either Sirius or Harry here. But there were both political and practical reasons they could not be. Well... Lupin smiled again, perhaps there were no political reasons, but the practical still held sway. While Remus had every confidence in the charm that had been cast, if anything did go wrong he would prefer for it to go wrong when both Sirius and Harry were well away from any damage he may cause. They would claim that they could help him, but Lupin knew better. If something went wrong then there would be nothing anyone could do but watch, and he would never willingly allow either of them to watch.

"Pack Leader?" Gideon called out to him softly.

"Yes?" Remus turned away from gazing at the stars, looking deep into the Shadows where Gideon was curled up.

The other werewolf looked uncertain for a moment. He was nervous about undergoing the change in an unfamiliar environment with company. He knew that Remus was a fellow werewolf and so couldn't be hurt by his werewolf form, but knowing did not dampen fear. And fear had been drummed into werewolves from the time they were known. The punishments handed out by the Ministry tended to be swift and final.

"Are you... do you really think that the charm will work?" Gideon asked in a rush.

"Ah," Remus murmured, understanding. He glanced towards the horizon where the moon would rise before he replied further. "I usually use a potion, Wolfsbane, to avoid losing my human mind, but the person who brews that for me is currently not in the right frame of mind so I haven't taken it."

Gideon looked both hopeful and depressed. "So you have never tried this charm?"

"No," Remus said with a smile, turning back to the Death Eater. "However, I have every faith that it will work. Remember, the charm is something that works on desire. I want to retain my human mind, therefore I shall. That's how this charm works."

"But what if you don't?"

"Then it won't matter. You and I will spend our time together as werewolves and in the morning we will leave for the Gathering."

The Death Eater werewolf looked down, thinking.

Lupin sighed. "Gideon," he said quietly. "It's not as good as you think, keeping your mind during the change. Keeping your mind just allows you to see how much damage you could do, how many people you could turn. In many ways it's easier just to give in to the animal because then you won't know. It's different when you actually know."

Gideon shook his head. "That would be fine, but as far as the Ministry is concerned, you are held responsible for your actions, whether you remember them or not, whether you had control or not. I've been in werewolf form on attack nights for the Dark Lord. I've bitten innocents. I don't know who or how many. I've forced myself not to care because I consoled myself with the knowledge that there was nothing I could do. But now you are telling me that it's wrong, that there were, there are alternatives? How am I meant to go on now?"

The elder werewolf took a deep breath and released it slowly. "I cannot help you with all of that Gideon. Even if you didn't know there was a potion, you chose to be a werewolf unchained and to allow the Dark Forces to herd you into attack. That is something you will have to deal with. What you know now is that there will be alternatives if the Werewolves take the offer that has been given to them, and what will matter from then on is if you allow yourself to be used as a weapon even with your human mind. The charm may depend on will but the Potion has none of that weakness. Then it really will be your choice.

"This offer does not stop us fighting Gideon. The power behind this offer wants our services in one battle and I rather suspect they will only want those who can keep their minds in werewolf form. Then Gideon, the choice to fight will be personal."

Remus would have said more but he felt a familiar twinge pass through his bones, a twinge that was echoed by Gideon as he stiffened. Moonrise.

"Are you ready?" Remus forestalled further conversation by asking the question.

Gideon gasped. Already the pain of transformation was effecting him. "No," he grated out the answer. "But I will be okay," he added, snarling as his teeth began to elongate.

Whether it was because Remus had been a werewolf longer, or because he was accustomed to maintaining himself, he wasn't affected as badly in the early stages. He looked towards the rising moon, focusing his thoughts on Sirius. He had found the easiest way of going through the transformation was to think of his friends and to remember the joyful surprise he had all those years ago when they had appeared by his side in their animagus forms to help him through everything.

Tonight though, Remus focused on how much more fun they could have had if he had of been able to keep his human mind. They had roamed the forest freely but they could have roamed with purpose, could have found every little secret within it. A soft smile graced his features as Lupin considered the possibilities. He didn't even feel his teeth lengthening into fangs or his bones shifting beneath his skin, some elongating, some contracting, as they forced his body into that of a wolf.

For anyone observing, it would appear that two werewolves were changing into their animal form with the rise of the full moon, but for those who could see magic, one of the transformations was markedly different. Around Lupin's head was a band of light that was almost like a crown. Running down his neck from the back of it were six ribbons of light. Two ran over his shoulders and down his arms ending in bracelets around his wrists, another two traversed their way down his spine before flaring out with his hips and running down his legs to circle his ankles and the last two traced their way under his arms, crossing over his chest and running over his belly to disappear under his groin. They formed a human shape on the wolf he was becoming and as the transformation was complete, Remus raised his muzzle and howled in triumph!

There had been pain, but the charm had been far more effective than he dreamed possible... Or... Remus laughed, the sound odd from the wolf's throat... The more powerful the person casting the charm, the better it was and Lupin would lay down any money that Harry had been the one to cast it on him. Sirius would have done his best, but Prongs Junior was far more powerful and had more of a vested interest in ensuring the charm's efficacy. No matter how it happened though, he was completely in control of the wolf.

There came a snarl from beside him and Remus turned. Gideon was fully transformed as well and like most wolves, he had sensed the threat of another male and was attempting to assert his dominance. The response was instinctual, and Remus didn't even think about it as he snarled in reply, his ears pinning themselves back as he bared his teeth at the other werewolf. The fur on his neck raised and he dug his claws into the ground.

The werewolf Gideon seemed stunned and almost yelped as he recognised the superior wolf. Remus' snarl softened slightly as the other werewolf backed away, and lowered himself to the ground in submission. There was only one pack leader here.

Satisfied, Remus turned his attention inward. He could still feel the wolf within him and the instincts were strong and would help in controlling this form. What did he know about running on four legs for example? The wolf did and that information was unconsciously there for him to call upon, but control lay with his human mind.

Some people had a romantic notion that all a werewolf had to do to maintain control during their transformation was to accept the wolf and to bond with it or something like that. Remus snorted. Some people were idiots who had no idea what it really meant to be a werewolf. You could accept the wolf within you all you wanted, Fenrir was a brilliant example of acceptance, but that did not grant control. It was an animal. It had an animal's instincts and desires and those were simple; eat, survive, procreate. For werewolves that didn't mean sex, that meant bite which was why they were considered so dangerous. Even if you were a werewolf like Fenrir, with a human side that desired and embraced the wolf, that did not lead to any greater control. It was simple; a werewolf on the night of the full moon was an animal. Without WolfsBane potion there was no escaping that.

Though perhaps now there was.

Inwardly, Remus smiled. Even before he knew who the Shadow Lord was he had been convinced that the werewolves should follow that course of action. The effectiveness of the charm was just something he could use to convince the others. The Dark Lord was seductive and tempting, the Ministry was order but unlikely, and the Shadows were unknown, It was time to step out of the expected paths and to take the unknown route because that was the one that gave them true light at the end of the tunnel.

Harry awoke with a start. His breathing was heavy and the remains of a nightmare retreated into his subconscious. It had been a while since he had a nightmare and usually he could recall them without any problem. Years of dreaming about Voldemort meant that he could recall all the gory details, but this was different. This had faded quickly leaving him with the impression of fear.

He didn't like the feeling. It made him feel sick in the back of his throat. Harry tried to focus his attention on something else, drawing deep breaths as he sought to calm himself. He rolled over, cracking open the curtains on his four poster bed to look over towards one of the windows. Dawn was beginning to lighten the sky so it was almost time to get up. With a sigh, Harry shook the last of the nightmare away from him and swung his legs over. If sleep was escaping him then he should make a virtue of the fact he was awake and get up. He had a lot to do today, anyway.

Green eyes blinked in the thin grey light and he grabbed a towel as he headed towards the bathroom for a shower. :How did Remus go last night?: Harry asked the Shadows that were everywhere.

:Perfectly,: they replied. :Though he did work out that it was you who cast the charm,: they added with a slight laugh.

Red lips twitched with a smile. Remus was not stupid though he often didn't get a chance to show his full intelligence as circumstance seemed to conspire against him. :That doesn't matter,: Harry dismissed the matter. :Have you found Xuld or the others yet?:

The Shadows seemed to sigh. :We think so,: they said but they did not sound sure.

:Where?: Harry demanded, stepping under the hot water.

:Where do you think?: his servants sounded disgusted. :The Malfoy Mansion.:

:I take it Narcissa was the Malfoy who should have been watched?:

:Probably.:

Harry was silent for a while as he bathed, ducking his head under the spray to wash his hair. As he turned off the water he looked back towards the Shadow that was up in the corner of the ceiling. :You can get around most wizards or witches, so why can't you get through whatever defences the Malfoy Mansion has?:

The Shadows growled softly, but Harry could tell they were not annoyed at him. :She's a halfling,: they said.

:A halfling?: Harry asked as the dried himself, rubbing the towel through his hair before wrapping it around his waist and heading back to the dorm.

:You have the potential to be a full tenshi, master but she is a halfling and we are annoyed at ourselves for not knowing this earlier. We would have never allowed her to gain such power if we had known.:

:You can't know everything,: Harry said comfortingly. :And you can't watch everyone all the time.:

:We are meant to watch the players better. We had no idea she was a halfling until she visited Ollivander.:

:And what does Ollivander have to do with this?: Harry pulled on his robes before heading down to the common room. As expected, it was empty and he shook the last of the water out of his hair as he savoured the quiet.

:The wandmaker is a tenshi, a full blooded one. He will not be involved because his job is to watch.:

:Watch?:

:His job is to watch wizards for the tenshi. Some like yourself can affect their world so they watch. They only act to protect their interests.:

:Ah,: Harry nodded as he exited the Fat Lady's portrait, intent on heading down to the Quidditch pitch. It was one of the few places in the school he felt comfortable. He knew that it was not safe but it was away from the hundreds of portraits that could watch his every move, his every expression. It shouldn't bother him, not when he had a spy in his mind, but it did and the solitude was comforting. Besides, this morning he had to arrange the Quidditch try outs. :So the tenshi are one of those groups who don't interfere so long as you leave them alone?:

:That is correct. They have no interest in this world, so long as this world is not a danger to them.:

:That doesn't make sense,: Harry objected as he summoned some parchment and began to write out a plan for the try outs. :Didn't you say that you were going to ask a tenshi to...: he trailed off. :Well, you know.:

The darkness around Harry seemed to quiver as the Shadows chuckled. :Individuals can be asked to do things,: they began explaining. :But for the tenshi to act as a whole, that would take a direct threat. They will watch you master, because you could be a direct threat to them but they will not pre-empt a strike. That goes against centuries of their history.:

Harry nodded as he considered. It sounded fine but in practice was it that simple? :I'm not sure how I feel about that,: he said. :I don't like the thought of a threat over my head, especially one that is not going to go away.:

:We know,: the Shadows sighed, :but for the moment there is nothing we can do. We are watching Ollivander and if the tenshi move, they will require his assistance so we will not be taken unaware again.:

:Okay,: the black haired boy conceded, :though if they learn about my animagus form, would they ask me to join?:

The Shadows were silent for a moment. :We don't think so, though... that is something we had not considered... With that form, you are more of a threat to them than any wizard could ever be. We will need to think on this,: the Shadow's said finally, their voice echoing with speculation.

:So long as I can see them coming, that will be enough,: Harry said firmly. :On a different topic though, where are we with Narcissa, and what does her being a halfling do for us? Will her full blooded parent interfere?: He asked, bringing the topic back to something they could act upon.

:It means we have to wait for her to show a weakness or an opening, then we crush her and her brat and if her parent objects, then we crush them as well.:

Harry laughed aloud. "That I can do," he said easily, folding the finished plans and pulling out his Firebolt. "I've got time for a quick fly before breakfast, don't I?"

:Yep,: the Shadows said happily. :We will watch Narcissa for a way past her, and we will watch Ollivander. If the tenshi think they can take you unaware, then they will find out exactly how much of a threat we are.:

Hermione sat in the Common Room, notes from the first days of class spread around her. She suspected Harry was already awake, but Ron wouldn't be up for a while which was fine with her. She needed to think.

Over summer she had told Ron that they needed to support Harry this year, no matter what... Which was all well and good but now she was beginning to see what 'no matter what' actually meant. She was a perceptive witch and she prided herself on being one of the most intelligent witches of their year level. She knew she had a penchant to rely on books a little too much, but she was a Muggle born, what else was she meant to do to find out information the Purebloods just thought was common place? And she knew that she was accused of blindly obeying authority, but again the authorities of the wizarding world were going to be what decided her future in this world and young she may be, but she knew they had long memories.

And that was why that "no matter what" was weighing heavily on her.

After seeing the way Harry handled himself during and after the train attack, she could see that his power had been developed over the summer, and his very quick explanation the other day about why he was taking every class just reinforced that. His results hadn't been announced but she knew they would be close to perfect. She'd been jealous for a moment before she remembered the pain that it cost for Harry to get his knowledge... She was still slightly jealous. Not enough to envy him but ... it was hard to know why but Hermione knew herself well enough to know that there was still a tiny bud of jealousy there. Who wouldn't feel that way? No matter how it had happened, Harry had all the knowledge of one of the greatest wizards of the time... Admittedly one of the greatest Dark Wizards but still it was a lot of knowledge.

Bemused, Hermione shook her head. This was not what she wanted to think about.

Sometime this year, they would be called upon to show that they would support Harry 'no matter what' and she wasn't entirely sure if she could do it.

They'd been back at school for less than a week but already she could see that Harry was not quite the boy... man she remembered. That 'no matter what' may lead to places she wasn't sure she was ready to travel. Last year she would have said that Harry would support the Ministry... no, that wasn't right either... He would support the Order of the Phoenix completely... This year she wasn't so sure. He obviously knew what path he was going to follow, no matter what his friends decided. He'd made that clear enough with the way he'd spoken to Ron. It was not up to them to decide.

Hermione sighed softly. She really needed more information. She wanted to follow Harry. He was her friend. He was one of her first friends... but she wasn't sure she could follow him without at least knowing which path he was on. Even if the destination was unknown, she wanted to know which path.

She nodded to herself, feeling calmer as she worked out what was bothering her. That was it. Harry was her friend. She hoped he would always be her friend and she would accompany him on his path but she wanted to know which path it was that they travelled. If it meant going against the Ministry, if it meant going against authority then that was okay, so long as she knew that.

:And if it means siding with the Dark Lord...?:

Hermione froze. She held herself so still her hair quivered.

That was not her voice.

Cautiously she looked around, not moving her head as she flicked her eyes over everything in the common room. There were a few Gryffindors who had come down, but they were engrossed in what they were doing. They hadn't whispered to her. She looked upwards, there was no one stuck to the ceiling though the shadows there did seem darker than she remembered, but that was probably the morning light. And she looked down but again no one was there and she could not sense anyone behind her.

So who had whispered the words?

She'd told Harry in their second year that hearing voices was something that was not considered good either in Muggle or wizarding society. That applied to her as well. There was no one in range that she could see who could have whispered to her. What did that leave?

Brown eyes closed as she considered. If there was no one she could see that left three options. The first was someone under an invisibility cloak, the second was a spell or charm or something that allowed the person to speak to her, like a patronus, and the third was that she really was hearing voices.

None of the other students had invisibility cloaks, they were simply too expensive and Harry only had his at school because he had everything of his at school. She didn't think it was Harry or even Ron under the cloak and why would they whisper such a thing to her... 'siding with the Dark Lord...' Not funny as a joke.

If it was a spell or a charm that wasn't the Patronus, she would have to research that. She'd always assumed that people used their patronus to convey messages to others because there was no other reliable charm and it guaranteed the message's authenticity. Though that did lead to a fourth option, perhaps the twins had invented something. Something that whispered would be up their alley, so to speak. She'd ask Ron about that later, and if necessary, make other inquiries while she researched for another charm which had similar affects because right at the moment, she wasn't prepared to accept she was hearing voices.

No matter what they were telling her.

But what if it's true? That thought was her own, and it lingered.

:Master,: the Shadows interrupted Harry.

The Shadow Lord continued writing as if there was nothing amiss. :What is it?: He asked silently.

:We think we may have screwed up,: they said softly.

:That's unusual. What happened?: If they thought they had mucked up then it was potentially the end of the world given how carefully his servants played the game usually, but perhaps it was only something small and could be fixed easily.

:We tried to give one of your friends a nudge.:

Harry almost chuckled. He knew which friend they referred to already. :And she noticed you?: He asked, pre-empting any further explanation.

:Yes,: they said morosely. :Though she is currently researching options as to what the 'voice that whispered to her' might be.:

:She isn't the brightest witch of our generation for nothing,: Harry told the Shadows kindly.

The Shadows gave off a feeling of mild annoyance. :We were noticing that,: they said somewhat snidely. Most wizards or witches just heard their voice and assumed it was their subconscious. That's how they had gotten away for so long with just pushing the players into position, with the players believing all the time that they were making their own decisions. It was rare that someone, Muggle or magical, was so in touch with themselves that they could immediately ascertain that it was not their subconscious. Obviously, over time some people got to that point, but by then most didn't care, they were too happy with the advice they were getting to give it up and usually came up with some other explanation to justify why they were listening to the Shadows.

:It's all right,: Harry assured them after a moment. :When she eventually comes to me, I'll just laugh and say that I was waiting for them to notice you guys and then we will have formal introductions. That should be okay and we can pass it off as you merely playing, trying to be noticed. You've made the suggestion now to her anyway, and that's not going to go away, no matter whom or what suggested it. Even if she doesn't consciously think about it, I know Hermione. She'll remember and all unknowingly; she'll be looking for evidence. For now, unless she truly comes to the conclusion that it was something else, hold off talking to her. Though perhaps be a bit more attentive around me?:

Darkness laughed, and Harry smiled at his servants. Even if it was only around his friends, who would eventually, hopefully be brought into his confidence, the Shadows were still masters of the game. Perhaps that was why victory was always theirs as there was no such thing as a battle that was not taken seriously.

Harry would do well to remember that for this year.

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