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Moonlight Transformations	By : sboyle Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 2007 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Moonlight Transformations
- 1
Update 10/05/05: As per the new rules, I'm adding a disclaimer here. This story really needs an actual chapter update, but no such luck.
Disclaimer: Pursuant to copyright law, I acknowledge that I own none of the characters, concepts, or other related material in Harry Potter. I make no money from the writing of fan fiction based on the property of others.

�Hey, ow!�

Hermione rolled her eyes and finished probing the injury.

�Don�t be such a baby, Harry.� She opened an antiseptic swab and dabbed at the wound with it. He winced but kept his mouth shut as she put a bandage over it.

�How did you say this happened?� Hermione asked, looking at the blood on the swab.

�I bit myself shaving,� Harry said, averting his eyes. He pulled his shirt back on over his head.

She laughed at first, but then her expression sobered.

�Did Remus do this to you?� she whispered.

�Yeah.� Harry hung his head. �It was my fault, really. He didn�t want to risk it, so close to the full moon.�

�Does he know?�

�No.�

Hermione pursed her lips.

�How did it happen?� she asked, taking off her gloves.

�I�I think he bit me,� Harry said softly. He looked up at Hermione, shoulders hunched in shame.

�That would make sense with the shape of this wound,� Hermione said. �But let�s hope that�s not it.�

�How can I be sure?�

�Full moon the day after tomorrow,� she said, shrugging.

�Should I tell Remus?� Harry asked, running his hands through his hair.

�I would.�

�Tell Remus what?�

Remus came in from the next room, shaking snow from his shoulders. Harry and Hermione turned to look at him sheepishly.

�I know that guilty look anywhere,� Remus said. He was pale and ragged, as was usual for this time of month. �Come on, give.�

Hermione flashed a nervous smile and excused herself quickly.

�Well then,� Remus chuckled, sitting down next to Harry. �What was that all about?�

Harry put his arms around his lover and made a muffled noise. Remus hummed happily. They sat quietly for a moment before Remus pulled back.

�Quit avoiding the issue.�

�I wasn�t,� Harry protested.

�Oh?�

�Okay, okay.� Harry pulled his shirt back off and set it on the table.

�Now really, Harry. Not in the kitchen,� Remus said, smiling.

Harry stood up and turned around to show Remus the bandage on his back.

�What�s that?�

�Take the bandage off and see,� Harry said quietly.

Remus gently took the tape off and pulled back the gauze.

�Oh my god,� he breathed. �Harry, did I do that?�

�Yeah.� Harry put his shirt back on and leaned back against the wall. �It could just be a scratch, Moony.�

�No.� Remus put his head in his hands. �God, Harry, I�m so sorry.�

�No, hey, it�s probably nothing.� Harry knelt down in front of him and touched his arm. �Hey, look at me.�

Remus sighed and met his lover�s eye. Harry smiled at him.

�Harry, do you even comprehend how bad this is?� Remus d, ld, leaning his chin in his hand. Harry�s smile faded.

�Yeah, I do.�

�We can�t just leave him in there,� Ron muttered.

�He wanted to be sure,� Remus said. He lay limply on the couch, skin ashen and glistening with cold sweat. �I tried to get him to take the potion.�

Another blood-curdling howl split the air, and the heavy sound of a body striking the door made both men wince.

�He�s going to hurt himself.�

�And if we let him out, he�ll hurt us.� Remus� tone was matter-of-fact. �Tomorrow morning I�ll force him to drink the stuff.�

�It�s still a rotten way to spend the night.�

�I know.�

Ron looked at Remus ashamedly.

�Of course,� he said, hunching down in his seat. The Quidditch match on the telly held only the slightest interest for either man; Remus� eyes were unfocused and glassy, and Ron was listening to Harry�s attempts to batter down the door to the basement. Sirius had gotten it reinforced so Remus would have a place to go during his transformations, and now it made an ideal cage for Harry.

�Does it never end?�

Both looked up to see Severus enter. He had a sour look on his face, but in Ron�s experience he always had a sour look on his face. Remus let his gaze slide back to the television, too sick to even care.

�If he had just taken the potion I made��

Ron rolled his eyes.

�Sit down, Snape. Your team�s winning.�

It was an international match; France against Romania. Normally both teams were pretty equally mediocre, but the French were unused to playing in the freezing rain that was coming down hard on the Romanian home pitch. A timeout had been called to place anti-frostbite charms on everyone�s fingers and toes early in the game.

�Thank God for sunny Scotland,� Ron muttered. �Even our worst winter matches never looked like that.�

�Who knows, Weasley. It might have improved your game.�

Severus took the other chair, glancing sidelong at Remus on the couch before turning his attention to the game. The other man appeared to have fallen asleep.

�Look, I think he�s found it,� Ron said, as the camera panned upward to follow the Romanian Seeker as he dove down through the icy rain. �What a massacre.�

�Don�t count on it�he�s had a terrible season.� The pessimistic statement turned out to be valid; the Seeker halted as though confused, and flew lazily back to his previous vantage point.

Ron and Severus both startled as another strangled howl came from downstairs. Remus woke up so violently he fell off the couch, but bounced to his feet more quickly than Ron would have thought possible. He made a strange throaty sound, more like a bark than Ron wanted to admit. Severus tensed as though ready to flee. Remus shook himself all over and lay back down on the couch, sighing heavily.

�Definitely making him take that potion tomorrow,� he muttered, curling into a fetal position.

The other men turned their attention back to the game, occasionally glancing at Remus, who went back to sleep.

Everyone else stood back while Remus unbarred the door. It was daylight out, but most of the Order was still wary. Remus sighed and slipped in, closing the door behind him. Harry was asleep, and looked almost peaceful, except for the bruises and scratches all over him.

�Come on,� Remus grunted, pulling him into a sitting position. Harry blinked a few times.

�Oh, my head,� he groaned.

�es yes you right for not taking the potion,� Remus chided, smiling. �Now come on. I�ve brought you some clothes, and there�s breakfast waiting in the kitchen.�

He handed Harry the glass beaker and waited. His lover looked at the viscous potion and made a face.

�You�re drinking that even if I have to make you,� Remus said. Harry closed his eyes and downed the whole thing, coughing at the thickness and flavor of it.

�That�s disgusting,� he said.

�Only a little. You get used to it.� Remus hauled him to his feet and helped him dress, then let Harry lean on him as they went back out into the house.

�That�s reassuring.�

Molly was in the kitchen, but Molly was always in the kitchen, especially since the Burrow had been destroyed by Death Eaters the previous summer. She made as if to pile food in front of Harry, but Remus whispered something in her ear. Molly nodded, her face forming that motherly I�m-concerned-for-you expression, and brought him a plate of toast.

�For starters,� Remus murmured, pushing it in front of Harry. �It�ll settle your stomach, and you can try something more adventurous.�

Harry nibbled obediently at the toast, though he hardly looked enthusiastic about it.

�That was the most awful experience of my life.�

�Tell me about it.� Remus smiled warmly and tried in vain to smooth Harry�s unruly hair. He quietly watched Harry to make sure the young man ate something and drank plenty of fluids, then led him gently off to bed. When he made to leave his lover alone, Harry pulled at his robes and whimpered. Remus could not resist the sad green eyes, and he curled up under the duvet with Harry snuggled in against his chest.

The next two nights passed uneventfully for both werewolves, thanks to Snape�s concoction. They spent quite a lot of time sleeping off the side effects, nestled together like littermates from some hellish brood. Harry did not speak to Remus about what he had become, and Remus offered no comment. It was something that could not be explained in words; where once Harry had ached to know more about the transformation his lover feared and hated so much, now he knew.

Remus brooded silently over what he had done to Harry, drawing him into the nightmare that was his everyday life. At first the younger wizard did not notice this; Remus was always quiet and private. But one night Remus rebuffed his advances and left the safe haven of Number Twelve Grimmauld Place. He was out for hours, not returning until the light peeked over the hori
�Where were you?� Harry asked.

�Walking.�

�Why?�

�I was thinking,� Remus said. He crawled into bed, his back to Harry, and curled into a tight ball.

�You�re still mad at yourself.�

�Why shouldn�t I be?�

Harry sighed. He�d been so foolish. Remus knew his condition better than anyone; when he insisted to Harry that it was dangerous for them to have sex so close to the full moon, Harry should have listened. His youthful ardency had blinded him to the risks. Then again, Harry had always been blind to danger, especially when it threatened him alone. He had been lucky too many times. Some day that good fortune would run out.

�I wanted to do it that night. You tried to push me away. I didn�t care about the risks.�

�You were lucky, Harry,� Remus said, staring lifelessly at the faded wallpaper. �If it weren�t for that foul little vial I drink for a week before the full moon, I might have killed you.�

�I doubt that.� Harry touched Remus� back.

�What would you know of it?� Remus snarled. He rolled over and seized Harry�s hand. �I am a monster, Harry. Get that through your thick skull!�

He looked at his knuckles, whitening as he gripped Harry�s wrist, and carefully let go.

�And now I have done the thing I promised I would never do,� he said softly, closing his eyes. �I should never have let anything grow between us, Harry. All the facts told me that, but I listened to my heart and not my head.�

�It�s too late for that now,� Harry said, not unkindly. He brushed Remus� hair back out of his eyes, noting that the streaks of gray flashed silver in the light. Remus was thinner than he�d been when Harry first met him, back at Hogwarts. The years had not been kind to him, but Harry treasured every little scar and line.

�I know.� Remus sighed heavily and rubbed his eyes.

�You regret what we�ve had.� Harry asked, his tone more biting than he�d meant.

Remus looked at him and Harry immediately wanted to take it back. The pain in his lover�s eyes made Harry�s heart ache. This was Professor Lupin, who had befriended him at a time in his life when even Ron and Hermione did not understand what was happening in his heart. Remus, who�d comforted him when Sirius died, and shared his pain. Moony, his beloved. He was the only person who ignored what Harry was and saw him for who he was.

�Harry, I admit it was foolish of us.� He touched Harry�s cheek with a rough thumb, smiling sadly. �You are so very young.� Remus stared at him a moment, eyes memorizing his features as though they had never met. �I have many regrets in my life, Harry. That is not one of them.�

�I didn�t mean to say it that way,� Harry whispered.

�I know you didn�t, pet.�

Harry reached out and gently touched the dark circles under Remus� eyes.

�You look exhausted,� he said.

�I always look exhausted.�

�I guess that�s true.� Harry smiled. �Oh, god, am I going to start looking as bad as you now that I�m a werewolf?�

�What do you mean?� Remus asked, keeping a straight face. �It would be an improvement in your case.�

The meeting had been dragging on interminably; Harry and Ron were passing notes under the table, and were each separately kicked under the table by their respective mates. Finally, Dumbledore adjourned them, leaving the two young men to seek others� notes on what was said.

Harry would later wish he had paid closer attention.
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Moonlight Transformations